


A Warrior and His Dealer

by CallmePhire



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Canon-Typical Violence, Cliffhangers, Dean hates feelings, Dean is In Over His Head, Dean is emotional, Everything was changed, Explicit Sexual Content, Hurt/Comfort, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, I mean slower than slow, I mean there's elements but it's kinda far off the here, Lots of it, MVP of the year, Multi, Nobody knows, Plot Driven, Poor Dean Winchester, Poor thing, Protective Bobby Singer, Protective Castiel, Recreational Drug Use, Sam is clueless, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Hatred, Slow Burn, Sorry Not Sorry, This gets pretty dark, Torture, Universe Adjacent, WOAH THERE, You'll Never See It Coming, canonish?, he's a saint, will the burn ever stop?
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-05
Updated: 2019-06-13
Packaged: 2019-08-19 13:03:25
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 13
Words: 48,577
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16535099
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CallmePhire/pseuds/CallmePhire
Summary: Mary died in that fire...John was torn to shreds about it. He did his research, got involved in the hunting life. He decided to keep his sons as far away from it as possible. But fate doesn't work like that now does it?





	1. We Don't Gotta Die so Soon

**Author's Note:**

> HELLLLLLLLLLLLLLO!!! Back at it AGAIN! I'm so happy I took the time to really work hard on this! I just got so inspired and the ideas poured out of me. As if says in the tags this is canonish. Sorta within the realm of the show but there were A TON of changes to fit the wacky ideas i had in mind! I really hope you guys enjoy this one! Please leave me comments and let me know what you think. This chapter is all about background, really setting the scene here. Enjoy xoxo!

  
Life for Dean Winchester was hard. He didn’t like life, not one bit. It was extremely difficult and never giving him a chance to breathe. Life was especially hard right now, with his parents being dead and only having a GED and a car to his name. The luckiest things to ever happen to him were in the form of the two people closest to him. His Uncle Bobby, who let him work in his shop and live in the apartment building he owned on their side of town. Of course Bobby being the grunting gentle soul that he was gave Dean the biggest apartment in the whole building, a spacious 3 bedroom apartment he could call his own. Dean fought against it, hard, telling Bobby he wanted to earn his keep and that all he could afford was the 1 bedroom. He was more than willing to let Sam have the bedroom and he’d take a couch in the living room. Not like he had many real friends to invite over, or any warm bodies he’d let into his space to keep him satisfied. Bobby got tired of arguing and forged Dean’s signature on the lease, the rent being much lower than the apartment was worth. So he paid the 1 bedroom price for the 3 bedroom space. Bobby justified it by stating ‘well technically you are only living in one bedroom’. Dean of course wanted to continue this battle, he wasn’t the type to back down, but then he considered the most important person in his life and how much he would enjoy that apartment and he caved. His brother Sam deserved the nice home that Dean never got until he was an adult. Sam was a senior in high school now with his sights set on Law school. The kid was the smartest person he knew, probably the smartest he’d ever know, so of course he supported his dream of being a lawyer. He supported everything Sam wanted, and the gesture was always returned, except for the things that Sam didn’t know about.  
Dean wasn’t a secretive person, per say, he just wasn’t an open book. He told Sam and Bobby only what he deemed necessary for them to know. Dean made pretty good money at the shop, and his other mechanic jobs he got on the side, but he needed more. He needed to help Sam with whatever he needed outside of scholarships. Sam wanted to get a side job, but Dean wasn’t having it. He knew Sam would be burnt out from studying alone, a part time job would completely destroy him. And he wasn’t going to just let that happened. So Dean picked up another side job, one he couldn’t tell anyone about since it was illegal.  
Dean was a drug dealer.  
Not anything big like a king pin cartel man, very small time. He started out with weed, but that wasn’t enough so he graduated to pills. Narcotics. People feigned for the stuff. The opioid crises in America was very good for business. Sure he knew they were most certainly gateway drugs to much harder things, but he wasn’t selling those so he felt a small bite of justification. He most certainly knew what he was doing wrong, but can you blame him? Probably.  
On this particular morning he was bugging Sam as he got ready for school. He’d switched out all his brother’s underwear for lacy women’s panties and set up a little scavenger hunt so he could find the one pair he would need so he could be on his way. Sam was frustrated beyond repair and Dean just followed him around the apartment cackling like a rabid hyena. He refused to give Sam any clues, so the young man had no choice but to play along. While to Sam, or any bystander would think Dean was being mean and childish, there actually was a decent reason for today’s antics. Dean knew Sam had mid-terms starting today and he wanted to distract him from his usual pre-test freak out. See if Sam was busy fuming about Dean’s banter than he wouldn’t be worrying about his exams as much. Sam did poorly when the pressure was too heavy, he made poor decisions. Dean was merely providing a distraction to take some of the pressure off.  
“Dean seriously—I can’t be late today! You’re a jerk for this!” Sam shouted picking up a sheet of torn paper containing yet another riddle to solve to be one step closer to find his stolen underwear.  
“Oh Sammy! You found the last clue!”  
“Jack is my best friend? What the hell is that Dean?”  
Dean followed after Sam who was now grunting while walking towards the kitchen. He reached up with ease into the cabinet above the sink where Dean kept all his precious alcohol. Behind an almost empty bottle of Jack Daniels was a white pair of boxer’s that could only belong to Sam himself. Dean chuckled and clapped congratulating his brother with a pat on the back. He watched Sam storm out of the kitchen to resume his morning routine. What he also didn’t know was that Dean had changed the alarm on his phone to ring a half hour earlier than normal. Dean always makes ample time for his shenanigans, no way would he make Sam late for school.  
* * * *  
Life for Dean Winchester was hard. So when Sam asked him if he had to work at the shop today Dean gave him a bullshit lie about working on some old ladies car. Dean watched as Sam slung his backpack over his shoulder and shut the apartment door behind him. He didn’t like lying to Sam because lying was wrong. Plain and simple. But lying was necessary in the hard life he lived.  
Waiting until he was sure Sam was out of the building he went to his liquor cabinet and poured two shots worth in his half drunken coffee. He needed to take the edge off before he got his day started. There always seemed to be an edge in need of taking off so Dean often found himself in a consistent state of being buzzed. Sure it wasn’t the healthiest way to live mentally or physically, but Dean was all about doing what he had to do. Of course he didn’t actually need the alcohol, but it helped.  
Dean had a morning ritual of his own that varied from Sam’s in small ways. He took a shower and brushed his teeth, fixed his hair then got dressed. Then he had to text his ‘boss’ to see if any drops needed to be made. If drug dealing was a blue collar job then Dean would be something like an assistant manager who always got employee of the month. His ‘boss’ was a shady man named Crowley. A rotten rich man to the core, but he was good to Dean. Some of the others around the same level as him threw him rotten looks every now and those he learned to brush off. Crowley always offered, Dean always declined, but he continued to offer nonetheless for a free try of his own. Dean wasn’t into drugs, sure he tried them in his troubled youth days, but he never made a habit of it. He didn’t like the feeling of being out of control. Sure alcohol was a vice, but it was his only, and he never felt not in control when he drank. He just cared less, and in his line of work that’s what he needed.  
Crowley was a very organized for a drug dealer. Everything had a set price so he knew he couldn’t ever be cheated without consequence for the offending party. The many regulars he had knew about these prices and they paid accordingly, they also knew the consequences that would follow should they not. The ones who didn’t know him already learned quickly what would happen to them if they tried. Once Dean had a guy try to bargain with him to lower the price cause he was in a pinch and he was ‘good for it’. Dean never understood why people tried to buy drugs they couldn’t pay for. If they were needed that badly then you better find a way to get the money necessary. Dean of course was way above giving into a sob story. He walked away from the guy without another word and immediately reported back to Crowley. The man had went on and on to his goons about people not being polite when being offered a service. He told Dean ‘anyone else gives you issues you come straight to me’. Dean never did see that guy again.  
Sure enough Crowley responded with a quickness and told Dean to meet him at the house. The house he spoke of was more like a headquarters than anything else. Crowley didn’t actually live there, but a few of his most faithful goons did. With a flask in his hand along with his keys, phone, and wallet Dean left the apartment building and was on his merry way.  
* * * *  
Existence for Castiel was peculiar. Castiel was a warrior of Heaven if you ever saw one. He followed every order without rebuttal or failure. One of the most upstanding angels in the Garrison. But he had a secret, he had a love for humans and desperately wanted to go to Earth. He of course hadn’t shared this with anyone, but the archangel Gabriel, his favorite of all his brothers, shared his love for humanity. They were such peculiar creatures, capable of so many things. They took their free will and ran with it in every path imaginable, whether it be good, evil, or something in between. It was remarkable to watch them from above, but he wanted nothing more than to be among them.  
He got his wish when he was sent on a mission to save a Dean Winchester from dying. It seemed mediocre at best, but he was thankful for the opportunity with gratitude. He was to find this Dean in a small town called Sioux Falls. He wasn’t given further information, just that he had to stop his impending death.  
“Gabriel. I’m going to Earth!” he exclaimed as he found his brother in the garden.  
“Good stuff Cassie. Better find a nice vessel. Someone healthy and attractive.”  
“Why is attractiveness important at all?”  
“Well obviously you don’t want to be ugly.” The archangel chuckled.  
* * * *  
Dean walked in the front door with the sternest expression he could manage. Weakness was something he couldn’t show here, they’d pick him apart in a second. He passed a few familiar faces and some he’d never seen before. He nodded in acknowledgement and pushed forward towards the kitchen where he heard Crowley growling on about someone being late on payment.  
“Should’ve went with my gut on this! I knew that piss stain Alvin would be a pain in my side the day I met him. Find him! Now!” and with that several goons pushed back in their chairs and silently left out the back door to bring Crowley what he wanted.  
“Crowley.”  
“And here’s my favorite!” he beamed with a spread of his arms. “Dean, always on time this one.” Crowley was now speaking to a man that sat at the far end of the table.  
The man was downright creepy looking. His skin was oily and he had a yellow stained smile painted across his face. He looked at Dean like he was his dinner for the evening. Dean had met quite a few of Crowley’s associates, they were all forms of shady and strange characters. This one was by far the creepiest of them all. He made Dean downright uneasy.  
“Dean I’d like you to meet Alastair. He’s an associate of mine based out of California.”  
Associate. Crowley ones referred to other’s as just that. Never friend, or buddy, not even a pal in the mix. He often wondered if Crowley even had friends or family. Everyone around him was in some shape or form, part of his business. Any other person on the planet besides the two in this room he’d feel a pang of pity for. It must’ve been a lonely life to not have anyone close to you. No one special to you. But as far as these two were concerned Dean assumed that being surrounded by drugs, danger, and money were enough for these two.  
“Nice to meet you.” Dean nodded and spoke flatly. Nothing about it was genuine about what he said.  
“Dean I have quite a big buy for you today. Just one. The small time ones I’ve already handed out. I wanted this done right.”  
This was the last thing Dean wanted. More responsibility and to be considered important. He didn’t want a career in this. It was his twisted version of a get rich quick scheme and he wanted to leave it at that.  
“What you got for me?” he asked.  
“See, see! That’s what he says every time. No one else does that. This guy does what I tell him to do and he does it well.”  
“I need me a guy like that.” Alastair licked his lips and looked Dean up and down.  
The disgusting gesture went unnoticed by Crowley, but Dean caught it and he was beyond grossed out. He took a step back and returned his full attention to Crowley.  
“Do you know where the La Aube is?”  
Dean knew that place a little too well. Better than he’d like to admit. It was a gay club just outside of town. Secretly it doubled as a brothel during the day. Of course Crowley would have connections there. It was too classic of a place for him not to stick his grubby fingers into. Dean only went there on the busiest nights, he wanted to remain just a plain face in the crowd, and he always wore a hat to pull down to help cover his face. He never went for the services they provided except for the bar. Never got any dances, despite all of the offers tossed his way. He merely went for the drinks that were always free and a nice sight to watch as he drowned himself in liquor. Benny was a bartender there and he gave him enough free drinks that Dean considered him a friend. Although they never talked outside of the club and probably never would he thought of him as a friend nonetheless.  
“Yeah I’ve heard of it.” Dean tossed nonchalantly.  
“Good. Well the owner is wanting to buy a large stock of several goodies. I need you to make the drop. Business hours are starting there now so take Harold with you. Safety in numbers and all that.” Crowley talked as he handed Dean a plain black messenger bag that was no doubt full of drugs.


	2. Pity Seeks, Pity Sucks

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heyyyyyyyyyyyyy! So I was planning on having a schedule of every Monday, but I couldn't wait to post the next one. I've been working diligently so I have all the way up to chapter 10 written and up to chapter 5 edited. I don't want to get overwhelmed with life and trying to post this at the same time so I've given myself ample time to work with. Some of you know the drill. Anything wild will be tagged in the notes. I give warnings cause I don't want to surprise anyone. None for this chapter though. As always thank you so much for stopping by and reading this. Leave comments and kudos please!!! Follow me on tumblr for more fan ugliness @fanofthephire! xoxo Happy Reading!

Life for Dean Winchester was hard. Not only was it strange to walk into a club while the sun was still high in the sky, but he was walking in with enough drugs to get him at least 25 years in prison. He was overwhelmed walking into the office. Harold stood at least two steps behind Dean at all times. He was hired muscle and took that title very serious. Dean tried to make common banter throughout the ride over there, but Harold wasn’t one for conversation. He was one of the seen and not heard types. After the third ‘hmmph’ he received in response Dean thought it better to just abandon it all together and stew in the awkward silence.

Behind the desk in front of them sat a man called Franklin. He wore a large pink, fur coat like it wasn’t already 70 degrees in here. Spring was upon them and the man was dressed like it was the dead of winter. His eyes looked hungry as Dean sat in the worn leather chair that sat in front of the desk. He sank down slowly in the uncomfortable chair, maintaining eye contact with the man. A smile wormed its way across his face as Dean leaned back trying to act casual. Harold remained in the corner but off to the side enough that Dean could still see him.

“You must be Dean.” The man reached over with a hand out for Dean to shake.

“Yes and I didn’t catch your name.” He lied leaning forward giving the man a stiff grip and shook once before withdrawing completely.

He didn’t like the look in the other man’s eyes, it was unnecessarily intense as if he was sizing Dean up. The man reached one hand over to the cell phone that sat on the desk and began tapping away at it finally breaking eye contact. Dean let go of a breath that he didn’t realize he was holding.

“My name is Franklin. It’s a pleasure to meet you. Mr. Crowley speaks very highly of you. I’ve heard nothing but good things.”

Dean really wanted to cut this whole interaction short. He hated when customers wanted to make this like an actual business deal. That added certain pleasantries to this that he’d rather not put forth the energy to do. To get his point across he reached down for the messenger bag and sat it on his lap without further discussion. This is what he was here for and this is what needed to get done.

Franklin laughed at Dean’s silent statement and let his eyes wander over him. “He wasn’t kidding when he said you were all about business.” He reached in the top draw of his desk pulling out a thick envelope containing payment. “You know there’s a nice position I could offer you here Dean.”

Dean reached for the envelope and once it touched his hand he immediately opened it and counted it. Seems like it was all there, but he still handed it to Harold to double check him. He looked at the solid man as he counted the money. Then and only then when he gave Dean the nod he needed did he sit the messenger bag on the desk for Franklin. The man watched all of this happen with a serene look on his face, with a tad bit of amusement mixed in. It was almost like he didn’t realize Dean’s silence was his way of turning down the offer. Dean had no interest in being a dancer, nor did he want to be a prostitute. He would never frown upon these job choices, honest work was honest work. He certainly felt he had no room to judge when nothing about this was honest or legal.

He stood and nodded at the man, thanking him for doing business with him and exited the room with Harold on his heels.

*                             *                             *                             *                             *

Dean slumped on the couch with a bottle of beer and a burger he picked up from his favorite diner, and a Dr. Sexy MD marathon was his idea of a lovely afternoon, and that’s exactly how his brother found him when he came home from school.

“Hey Dean.” He greeted briskly as he passed by his brother completely and went straight for his room.

Dean rolled his eyes and put his attention back on the show. He could hear a bunch of noise coming from Sam’s room and it was steadily getting louder until he was just plain annoyed that he paused the TV and went to go investigate. He swung the door open to find Sam’s normally messy room now resembling a war zone as he continued flinging things out of his closet. Clearly he was looking for a fire and hadn’t found it yet.

“Sammy what the hell man?” Dean’s hands were on his hips as he tried to look as stern as possible, though he was actually trying his hardest not to laugh at his brother’s pink face and scared expression. “Is there some emergency going on that I don’t know about?”

“Yes Dean there actually is,” he looked away from his brother and continued the deconstruction of his room. “I’ve got a date and I need to find something to wear.”

“A date hmm?”

Dean would never admit it, but he’s been waiting for this moment for a very long time. Throughout their lives they mainly lived with Bobby, only seeing their father for scattered times throughout the year. Even with Bobby around Dean was more of a father to Sam than a brother. He always made sure he ate on time, taught him all the things a parent should teach their kid, patched up his wounds when he got hurt, and made sure homework was done and chores were done. Dating was the one area where Dean could actually play the role of big brother with. He was downright excited for this, just as hype as Sam was nervous. He walked over to where Sam was now catapulting clothes from his dresser to where ever they’d choose to land behind him. Dean laid a firm hand on his brother’s shoulder trying to stop his madness and offer a helpful solution.

“Come to my room and tell me about this girl.”

“Her name’s Jess and she’s so freaking pretty Dean. Not like normal pretty or hot, but she’s just really beautiful. She’s really smart, we have AP Calc together and she’s like acing the class.”

“What made you want to ask her out?”

“Well we’ve been friends throughout high school, but I don’t know I just really want to take her to prom and I figured I could take her to dinner and ask her then. Everyone is doing those corny promposals and it’s really public and tacky to me. So I thought a private invitation would mean so much more ya know?”

“Real classy Sammy.” Dean turned to flash his brother a smile as he calmly rifled through his closet looking for a button up that would not only suite his brother, but fit him as well.

“So you think it’s a good idea right? I mean I’m not taking her anywhere fancy, but this seems like a much better way to do things. I mean the guys are getting out of hand at school, and a lot of them are getting turned down. Especially the ones doing the weird stunts. One guy got a mariachi band to march through the school behind him to ask some girl in my History class. He scared her half to death so of course she said no.”

“That’s actually pretty funny.” Dean chuckled as he pulled out a baby blue button up that would look perfect for Sam. He flung it at him and watched him catch it effortlessly. “Try this on.”

“What pants do I wear with it?” Sam asked while tearing his t-shirt over his head and shrugging the shirt on. 

“What about those nice black jeans I got you at the start of the year?”

“Right! I forgot about those. You’re a genius Dean.” He rushed out of the room with the open shirt flailing behind him.

“Course I am.” Dean’s grin was full of pride at his grown up little brother.

Dean resumed his place on the couch and continued his show, but only half of his attention was on it as the other half was watching Sammy float around the apartment trying to get ready for his date. At some point he was making a sandwich claiming he was hungry now and probably would be too nervous to eat later.

“Dean—I know it’s really important to you, but you’ve seen me drive and you even said that I do really well. I was wondering if you’d let me, maybe—“,Sam stopped short of his rambles as Dean pulled his car keys out of his pocket and dangled them in his direction.

Sam took them slowly and a smile wormed its way onto his face. He was more than overjoyed that Dean would trust him enough to borrow his prized Impala. Sam was just about the only person on the planet that he would trust his Baby with. He also knew that his brother knew the consequences should he hurt her in anyway.

“Bring her back to me the way you found her Sammy. Or there will be Hell to pay.”

*                             *                             *                             *

Existence for Castiel was peculiar. His landing was rough to say the least and he really didn’t have an idea as to where he was at this moment. Taking in his surroundings as he rose from the field he landed in, dusting off the dirt and leaves that littered the trench coat belonging to his new vessel. He shot for Sioux Falls, and he assumed this is where he was, but he had no clue how to find this Dean Winchester. He wasn’t given much information, just stipulated that he mustn’t fail. This human was now in his charge and he would be for as long as he needed to be. What was so important about this particular human that he needed to be watched after?

At this point it was beginning to get dark outside and Castiel was more than annoyed at the lack of information and guidance that his superiors should have offered. He was lost and alone, not that he minded being alone, it was more the lost part that bothered him. So he did all that he could do, and began walking. It took him a few steps to adjust to his vessel, but now going down a stretch of highway he was well acquainted with it. Gabriel stipulated that the vessel be attractive. He was more worried about the human being strong enough to hold him, but once he deemed him so he got the yes he needed and entered. He supposed this person was attractive enough, his eyes were a striking blue color that seemed to change in intensity depending on what kind of light he was in. The disheveled locks on his head were soft despite the wild appearance. The body itself was lean and muscular, this guy must’ve done some kind of exercise and made sure to take good care of himself. He was overall happy with the human he chose to inhabit and for now he’d have no complaints.

What he did have complaints for was the fact that he was still walking down this stretch of road and no clear direction to go. The one thing he did enjoy about this journey was he was able to view his Father’s prized creation up close. He could feel the wind flowing softly around him, the vibrant colors that shown in the sky as the sun set, the plants showing all shades of green and had so many different shapes and purposes. It all was truly beautiful, especially the creatures that got to live amongst the beauty. Sure heaven was really a sight to behold, but it was all business and orders up there, no real time to just sit back and enjoy merely existing. He had time to do that now, in his state of being lost, it was serene and he liked the peace it brought him inside. Sure there were very urgent expectations he had to meet, but here in this moment he just wanted to enjoy the seemingly endless stress of road and the nature around him.

Castiel was only torn from his lovely relaxation when a car pulled up beside where he was walking on the side of the road. He stopped and had a hand on his blade ready to engage should this be a threat. The person in the vehicle rolled down the passenger window and a small head full of red hair peered out at him. The person was smiling at him, could this person really be a threat if they were smiling? He could sense that they were human so they wouldn’t be able to do much anyway, he was a warrior of Heaven after all.

“Hey buddy are you lost?”

Oh. This was unexpected. Somehow this human knew that he was lost.

“Yes. I am trying to get to Sioux Falls.”

“What a coincidence.” The human laughed. “I’m going that way if you wanna hitch a ride.”

This…woman was offering to take him to his destination. He took his hand off his blade concluding that this woman was indeed not a threat, just attempting to help him on his way. He opened the door of the car and gingerly got into the seat. The woman’s face was pleasant. She seemed kind and compassionate, fully willing to help a perfect stranger.

“My name’s Charlie.” She offered a hand to him.

Castiel remembered this gesture from the last time he was on earth. It was quite a long time ago, but it seemed it was still a common thing to do when first meeting someone. He reached and clasped his large hand around her smaller one. Her hand was warm to the touch and the skin was so very soft. Castiel was very glad this is the first human he met on his quest. He hoped that this Dean Winchester was as pleasant as Charlie is.

“I am Castiel. Thank you for giving me a ride.”

“No problem. You had this look on your face and I couldn’t help myself.” She giggled.

Castiel creased his brows and head cocked to the side trying to figure out just what this look had been on his face. He was simply enjoying the scenery outside. He didn’t think he’d worn a distasteful expression.

“I’m sorry I don’t quite understand what you mean.”

“You looked lost.” She continued laughing. “But no matter, let’s get going shall we.”

She shifted a knob that sat in between them and was now driving down the road. Her hand reached a couple more knobs and the vehicle was now filled with soft music. Now this is one of the few things that angels and humans had in common. Though Heaven was all about everyone fulfilling their duty and purpose they did have certain joys, like music. Castiel found himself swaying ever so slightly to the song that was playing. Charlie noticed and smiled to herself, but didn’t want to ruin the moment by drawing attention to it.

Once they’d reached Sioux Falls Charlie had pulled into a gas station to fill up her vehicle and to drop him off. He said his thanks and as he was exiting the car she handed him a little card with her name and a several numbers on it.

“Never know when you might need it.”

Once she had pulled off leaving Castiel alone once again, he finally received word as to who Dean Winchester was.

*                             *                             *                             *

Life for Dean Winchester is exceptionally difficult. Some time ago, when Crowley first got the thought of Dean being his favorite, he entrusted some of his inventory to Dean to sell on his own. Dean of course keeps these items under serious lockdown so his little brother would never find them, and discover that Dean is exceptionally good at drug dealing. Because he doesn’t trust people very well he only deals alone to 3 customers. One being a guy he used to go to high school with. The guy is the same age as him and has a mullet for some reason, again Dean makes it a habit not to judge others so he never did ask what that was about. Ash, is a computer genius, a true wizard of technology if those existed, and he was a decent enough dude who just needed to occasional Xanax to keep things under wraps, his words, not Dean’s. There was Bryant, Dean didn’t know anything about the man except that he played guitar on the street for money and had a thing for Percs. Then there was some strange college kid, Harry, who was a part of some weird ghost internet show who just needed his Adderall.

Tonight the call came from Bryant. He was aware that he was into the harder stuff, track marks quite evident on the man’s forearms the rare times that Dean had seen them. Dean stepped into his room and shut and locked the door behind him in case Sam should come home suddenly from his date. He checked what stock he had and sure enough he had just enough to fulfill Bryant’s wishes. He stuffed the baggie in the pocket of his worn, brown leather jacket and tucked his gun into the back of his pants, carefully situating his plaid shirt over it to hide it. He rose from his squatting position and pulled out his phone confirming the meeting spot and that he was on his way.

It was a good thing they weren’t meeting too far since he didn’t have his car with him. The air outside was still thick from the heat of the day, but there was a cool breeze providing relief from the humidity. Sure it was too hot out for a leather jacket, but it all added to Dean’s rugged appearance, the façade he kept up to keep his reputation spotless. He was a drug dealer sure, but he was one not to be messed with. Those who were apart of the small underground world of it all knew who Dean worked for. It was a blessing wrapped with a cursed bow.

He was finally at his destination, mentally tearing himself away from his mundane thoughts, and made sure he was overly aware of his surroundings. They were meeting at a run-down corner store in a not so nice side of town. Dean knew nothing about the guy so he had no clue why he picked this particular meeting spot, but Dean never asked questions. That was his number one rule in all this, to never ask unnecessary questions. This was because questions led to answers, which led to more questions, which then led to attachments. What if Dean had asked about why they were meeting in this shady alleyway? The guy might jump face first into a sob story about his life, trying to gain sympathy from Dean, and that could lead to a whole host of issues in itself. Dean was a compassionate person, though his rough exterior and the hard way he carried himself said different, he was kind in all aspects of the word. Should a person truly be in need Dean wouldn’t resist doing all that he could to help, this was a part of him, ingrained into his DNA. And this is why he refused to ask even the minutest of questions, the only thing he allowed was the when and where a deal would go down, and if they had the funds to pay. Anything else was simply off limits.

He texted Bryant to let him know he had arrived, but Bryant was nowhere in sight. He waited another minute or so before what little patience he had was depleted and he dialed the man’s number. Putting the phone to his ear was a distraction he would later regret. As the monotone rings proceeded he failed to realize there were three men coming up behind him. He turned a second to late and his phone was smacked out of his hands and his arms were held to his back. His body reacted immediately, thrashing violently to try to get his limbs back under his control and out of the hands of two of his attackers. The third man went around to the front of him and punched him in the stomach, hard, before Dean could get his leg up to kick. He recognized the man immediately. Alvin, a squirmy worm who made a bad habit of getting high on his own supply. Crowley detested him and made sure he was aware of it. The dude always had a problem with Dean, but he never took it seriously. Now Dean was on the receiving end of his distain, each blow worse than the last.

He doubled over as a particularly nasty kick was delivered to his side. The two others let go of his arms and Dean collapsed to the ground. The fall shot pains through his knees all the way up to his thighs, but the attack only escalated from there. Flurries of various kicks, stomps, punches flew his way. Dean drew his arms up over his head and huddled his legs close to his torso until he laid in the tightest fetal position he could manage.

“Look at you! Fucking pathetic piece of shit!” one of the man spat.

“You think you’re so damn special cause the boss took a liking to you!” one of the other men hollered while he stomped a heavy, booted, foot into Dean’s hip.

“You waste of space! Trying to protect your pretty little face huh?!” Alvin yelled. “You must’ve let Crowley fuck that pretty face. Only explanation for why he likes you so much! You think you’re better than us huh?” he kicked Dean repeatedly in the thigh through his pathetic speech.

Dean was in agonizing pain at this point, not much but finally reaching death was on his mind. He was trembling as the blows had suddenly stopped. The men above him all huffed and puffed as if they were taking a break. Every nerve in Dean’s body hollered at him to get up and make a run for it, but he knew not all the adrenaline in the world would help him move off this dirty ground. That’s when Dean heard a loud whooshing sound. Like someone turned on one of those huge industrial fans, but the sound only lasted for a second of two. That’s when the screams started. He heard bones cracking and bloodied hollering, all three men had hit the pavement around him and none of them moved.

He then heard a single set of footsteps, slowly making their way to his huddled form. Against his better judgement he took a peek through the gap in his arms to see whether this person was a savior or a much stronger enemy. The sight before him was odd, a tall man in a full suite and a trench coat had approached him. The figure crouched before him with his head cocked to the side and his arms folded on his knees.

“Are you Dean Winchester?” a voice caught somewhere between a thunderstorm and a soft ocean wave erupted from the man’s lips.

“Who wants to know?”

“I need to know. Are you Dean Winchester?”

What the hell could Dean possibly lose at this point by simply confirming his name? He was hurt beyond measure and there was no way he could patch this up at home. He’d most definitely have to go to the hospital. Maybe mystery trench coat man could help him with that. That’s when Dean let his arms fall to the ground and discovered that mystery trench coat man was pretty damn hot. His bed head was oddly appealing, as if this was a good time for these thoughts.

“I am.”

“Good.” The man reached a single hand out and touched two fingers to Dean’s forehead.

All of a sudden Dean feels like he’d been plunged into clouds. Their warmth, loving and inviting, washing away all the pain he felt until he was numb. He feels clean all over until the hand was removed and the sensation begins to fade.

“What?” He starts to ask as he tries to sit up. He expects everything to ache and when it doesn’t he immediately begins to scoot away from the mystery trench coat guy. His movements are sloppy and he’s not moving very fast, but what else is he supposed to do when someone unknown hot guy healed him with two fingers?!

“Dean—there is no reason to be afraid. I’m not here to hurt you.”

Yeah if Dean had a damned dollar for every time he’s heard that he’d be living in a mansion on top of a hill being the poshest bastard ever, not that he really wanted that anyway. How does this guy know his name? Was he even a person? Dean was about to break his number one rule and he had all the reasons in the book to cast in his defense.


	3. Maybe I Should be the Hero

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey Hey! It's late where I am but I couldn't not post this. Until life inevitably gets to be too much I will definitely be posting on Mondays. No real warnings for this chapter. As always thanks for stopping by and reading this. Comments and kudos welcome! xoxo

To Dean’s surprise he is now sitting in his living room with mystery trench coat man. He all but sprints away from the couch and begins pacing the room as if that’ll somehow give him the answers he seeks. So this…..being, because Dean is pretty sure by now that this person is not human, has two different powers so far. He can heal and he can teleport. Dean is pretty fed up with calling him mystery trench coat man though so he starts his question rant with an obvious one.

“What is your name man?” He scrubs a hand over his face trying to ground him in the here and now.

“Castiel.”

“Ok that’s a lot going on there. What are you?”

“An angel of the Lord.”

“The Lord?!” Dean stops mid stride and spins facing the man sitting very comfortably in his living room. “Listen man. I don’t want any part of whatever government lab you escaped from so thank you for helping me out but I think you should go.”

*                             *                             *                             *

Existence for Castiel was peculiar. At this very moment he’s trying to figure out why Dean is pacing around the room like a mad man and shooting him side glances as if he did something wrong. He’s only following orders. But then it clicks. Dean has no idea what he is. He isn’t aware that the scope of creatures on this planet, in this universe, are so beyond what he knows.

Though Castiel wasn’t given much information on Dean and his purpose he did get some backstory on his father. John Winchester was a hunter. A man who took it upon himself to take down monsters and save people. He was known to embark on this journey, which was ultimately for revenge due to the murder of his wife. He was a good hunter, but not the best father. He left his sons with a close friend of his for most of their lives. John Winchester hunted everything under the sun. Demons, wendigo, gin, vampires, all manner of monster including ghosts, he kept a journal with the intention of leaving it to his sons. Castiel could tell Dean had not even peeked at that journal.

“Dean. Do you have your father’s journal?”

“How do you know about that?” Castiel watched Dean’s expression turn from stressed and borderline hysterical to guarded and defensive. He narrowed his eyes as they swept over him.

“I know a great deal of things Dean. And I’d be happy to tell you since they’re essential for your survival.”

“My what—listen man I need you to give me more information than that.”

“Concerning what exactly?”

“Who you are, where you come from? What you’re doing here, how the hell did we teleport here? I need to know all that and more.”

Dean wanted so badly to be freaking out more than this. He was confused sure, but he felt no real fear towards the creature sitting on his couch. He felt oddly safe with this being and that confused him the most. Dean walked away and went into his room in search of the journal that belonged to his father. John fucking Winchester. If you look at the definition of what a parent is he would be nowhere to be found. Nothing he did throughout Dean and Sam’s life could really be considered parenting. Most times he was gone on his ‘hunting’ trips and they were left at Bobby’s.

Memories flood his brain as he digs through the ratty box in the very back of his closet containing his father’s things. A jacket, a gun, some other odds and ends. Under all that he found what he was looking for, that thick, leather-bound journal that Dean had no clue what it contained. His father was a very closed off man. He never shared much about himself with his children, Dean guessed that’s why he ended up much the same. Closed to any and everything, to protect himself always. It was a toxic flaw of his character, but he didn’t see it necessary to be changed. He avoided a lot of hurt, and when he did get hurt, his good old repression skills always came to the rescue.

He crawled out of the closet and carried the journal back to the living room. Only to find the mysterious being called Castiel was no longer there.

*                             *                             *                             *

Life for Dean Winchester was demanding. He sat at the kitchen table with a full glass of whiskey and a pit in his heart. Hunched over the journal reading late into the night. His mind was reeling at what essentially was his Father’s diary. It talked of terrifying creatures, things worse than his nightmares. His father went up against these evil, foul beings all by his self for so many years. Some pages were even missing and those were the most troublesome parts to process.

He didn’t know what time it was, but it had to be late. He heard the front door opening gently, Sam, trying to sneak in. Soft footsteps were all that he heard until they stopped in the doorway of where he sat.

“Dean—um how come you’re still up?”

“Reading. How’d the date go?” he shut the cover of the journal and rose from his chair. It slid across the floor with a soft screech. It was the loudest sound Dean had heard in those hours he sat there alone.

“It was good. Jess is really awesome.” He flipped his hair out of his eyes and a soft smile played on his features. “Sorry I got in so late. She’s just really fun to be around.”

“So did she say yes?” Dean asked trying to keep this conversation going. He didn’t want his brother to ask about Dad’s journal. He would ask not only for an explanation of what sparked Dean’s interest to pull it out after all these years, but he would want to read it also. Dean couldn’t let him do that. He couldn’t explain what he didn’t know. Castiel was his only tether to finding out what all of this was. Why did he save Dean? The man needed confirmation of who Dean was before he healed them. Not the best display of good intentions if he had them. What if Dean had said no? Would he have left him there hurt and alone? It was just his luck that the being left before he had a chance to get all of his questions answered, or at least a way to contact him. Did angels have cell phones? Probably not.

He then realized that he hadn’t been listening to Sam talk all this time. A pang of guilt hit him as he refocused on Sam’s cheery retelling of his date. Apparently he and this Jess went for a walk after dinner. Sam was a hopeless romantic and he wasn’t afraid to show it. Sappy motherfucker, Dean laughed to himself.

“So when should we go shopping for your suit?” he asked clearing his throat before taking another drink of his cup.

“Well it’s in a couple weeks so we should probably go soon.” Sam answered slightly swaying on his feet. “You sure we should buy it? I mean we can just rent it for the night. It’ll be pretty expensive trying to buy it.”

When Sam got like this, worrying about finances, it always got Dean annoyed. Sure he wasn’t the richest guy in the world and they were mostly living paycheck to paycheck, due to Dean saving all his dirty money for Sam’s education. He was the big brother, the father, the guardian, so he would be the one to worry about money, not Sam. Dean hesitated before answering to get his irritation at a controllable level. Emotions were at an all-time high for him right now and blowing up on his brother was neither a good thing, or needed.

“No Sammy I want to buy you the suit. It’ll be your first actual suite right?” They hadn’t been able to afford a suite for Sam when his father had died, plus he was at the peak of his growth spurt and it would’ve fit one day and too tight the next.

“Yeah.” He bit at his bottom lip.

“So we’ll get you the suit for prom, and an extra shirt so you can wear it for graduation too.”

“Oh awesome. Good thinking Dean.”

“Alright get to bed. I got work in the morning so keep it down.”

Dean followed Sam back towards their bedrooms. He nodded his brother and bid him goodnight.

*                             *                             *                             *

Dean was just falling to sleep cuddled up with his pillow, not that he would admit it was cuddling because Dean Winchester doesn’t cuddle, he heard a whooshing. The sound was followed by silence. He didn’t move to see what it was he just kind of knew it was the angel returning. That’s a weird entrance, he thought.

“Dean, I know you’re awake.”

“Well you’re wrong. I’m sleeping and so should you.”

“Angels don’t sleep.”

“Then you can leave, I need my 4 hours.”

“We have much to discuss Dean.”

He finally turned over very much in irritation at the Heavenly intruder. “Why can’t it wait till morning?”

“Because you’re not safe unless you follow my instructions.”

“The hell you mean I’m not safe?!” he was trying to keep his voice down to avoid waking up Sam, but he was legitimately angry now. “I’ve got my brother sleeping across the hall.”

“That is precisely why you need to get up and do what I ask.”

“What’s coming?”

“So you read the journal? Good.”

“You gonna answer my questions?” Dean tossed his blanket and sheets off of him and rose from the bed. He looked down on himself and saw he was wearing only his boxers. Great, now the hot angel is gonna see me naked, he thought.

“You get your answers after you do as I say. Now you need to draw these symbols at every entry, “he pulled a sheet of paper with strange drawings on it and held it up to Dean, “And these on the walls.”

“Will these keep whatever is coming out?”

“Yes, and even if they get in they’ll be trapped in this.” He pointed to the strange circle drawing. “Do you know Latin?”

“I know it’s a dead language that no one speaks anymore. Why?”

“I’ll explain later.” Castiel turned and went out the bedroom. Dean followed him until they stopped in his kitchen.

On the table sat a bag containing what looked to be spray paint. Dean peered at Castiel like he had seven heads. He obviously didn’t know what it meant to be renting a place, he couldn’t just go spraying weird ancient pictures all over the place. Castiel noticed Dean’s hesitation and pulled one of the bottles out of the bag and handed it over to him. Sure enough Dean was a bit surprised to see the label read that the paint would only be visible with a black light. Well that makes things much better.

They got right to it, putting the symbols on the front door and the windows. Castiel explained that the symbols they drew on the floor in front of the door and under the carpet of the living room were devil’s traps. He nodded sharing that he did see something similar in his dad’s journal, although it hadn’t contained such a thorough explanation of what it meant.

Once the external rooms of the apartment were done, including the neglected third bedroom that they merely used for storage, Dean went in alone to do Sammy’s room. It would be weird to explain if he woke up while his brother was drawing strange things on his window and floor, but it would be much worse if some unknown man was there with him. When he had finished Dean half expected Castiel to be gone, but there he stood in the middle of the living room in all his brooding glory. The moonlight shining in from the dining room window splashed across the angel’s chest in just the right way the he truly did look heavenly. Dean swallowed around the lump forming in his throat trying to push the thoughts into a corner of his mind that he never went to. His repression closet, he was fond of calling it, where all unwanted thoughts and feelings go to collect dust and never see the light of day again. He opted to be in the present instead of conjuring a future that probably would never come to fruition.

“So can you answer all my questions now?”

“What would you like to know Dean?”

“For starters why are you here? I mean my whole life some serious crap similar to what happened tonight has happened before and heaven chooses now to send someone to save me? Why now?”

“I was sent here to protect you, as for the why I haven’t the slightest clue. What I do know is that some demons have found where you live and are keeping watch on you. Now whether they’re after you or your brother I’m not sure of yet.”

“How do you kill a demon?” Dean spoke as he headed towards the kitchen. Clearly he wasn’t going to get any sleep tonight so he definitely needed coffee for this. He reached for the pot of grounds and poured them into the filter. He got the pot and filled it with the tap, then poured it into the reservoir. Plugging the machine in and flipping the switch on, he then reached up in the cabinet getting out a random mug. He felt Castiel’s presence in the room but when he turned around he didn’t expect to find him standing so close. Dean could feel the lapels from the angel’s trench coat through his t-shirt and if he tilted his head just a hair forward their lips would be touching. Nerves and warmth spread through him as he backed up to the counter putting some much needed distance between them.

“You can find your answers in the journal. For now just worry about safety for the night.”

“Castiel, man, can you back up a bit? You’re in my personal space.”

He watched the angel sigh and take two steps back. A heap of air left his lungs and he was grateful for the distance, he made the right choice, the wrong would’ve been to listen to the nagging thoughts that still have yet to go to the closet.

“So since you’re here to protect me and my brother how am I supposed to get in contact with you? You got a phone number?”

“I don’t have a phone.”

“Well you need to get yourself one.”

“I don’t have money. Isn’t money required to purchase such things?”

“You flew your feathered ass all the way down here and they didn’t think to give you some currency?” Dean chuckled at the ridiculousness of the situation.

“You can simply pray to me Dean and I will come when you call.”

“Not exactly the praying type if you hadn’t noticed.” He turned to finish making his coffee pouring it into the mug along with a couple creamers he had lying on the counter. “I mean you found me at the tail end of a drug deal gone wrong.”

“Who were those men?”

Dean turned back around to find Castiel had taken a step and was a bit closer than he was before. This guy really had no concept of staying out of Dean’s bubble. He pushed that aside and told Cas of the events that happened prior. Of course he had questions, wondering why Dean was dealing drugs in the first place. That spiraled into a long explanation of how he wanted to give his brother the life he never got, he talked about their childhood, and despite it not being rough as it could’ve been if their father had taken them with him, it still was hard not being able to call Bobby’s house a space of their own. He wondered, internally, why he was sharing this with a perfect stranger, an angel, but a stranger nonetheless. The words kept flying and the tension he felt in the beginning of the conversation crumbled into dust. The angel was easy to talk to if you got past his intense stare that set on you the second you opened your mouth. He mainly listened, only commenting when the opportunity presented itself. If Dean was honest with himself, often time he wasn’t, he would say it felt good to unload all that baggage. It was only then that he realized somehow Castiel reached into his mind and opened the repression closet, letting all these things fly out. By then he had mentally shut the door and the conversation came to a halt.

“Well I’ve gotta work in the afternoon Castiel so I’ll talk to you soon I guess.” He rose from his chair and set his mug in the kitchen sink. “Wait if you don’t have any money then where are you staying?”

“Nowhere. There’s a field up the highway that I frequent.”

“So you’re broke and homeless? That’s no way to live man.”

Dean was now going to take it upon himself to take care of the angel. He had a habit of reaching his hand out to those in need. He’d never admit it, but he actually liked taking care of others. If Castiel was here to protect the Winchester boys than the least he could do was give him a place to stay.  He had to figure out a way to get Sam on board with his wild plan before anything could be set in stone.

“Alright. Go on ahead to your field and I’ll figure something out.” He said as he walked the angel to the door. It had to be at least 3 in the morning at this time and Dean was simply exhausted and very done with this day.

As he opened the front door to usher the angel out he simply whooshed away.

“Such a weird way to leave.”

*                             *                             *                             *

Sun splashed in his open window, rushing him to wake up from his slumber. The room was warm with spring air and he squinted at how bright it was. He was hot, and sweating all over, he scoffed as he threw the covers off of him. Taking his phone off the charger where it sat on his night stand, unlocking it to find a couple texts from Sam and a call from Bobby. He clicked on the missed call waiting for it to connect. Bobby’s voice rang through loud and grumbly as usual.

“Dean are you coming in today?”

“Yeah Bobby what time you need me to get there?” he coughed clearing his throat to rid himself of his post-sleep voice.

“You sleeping son? It’s one in the afternoon, get your lazy ass up!”

“I’m up Bobby.”

“You got one hour.”

Dean groaned as he hung up the call and got out of bed. Tuesdays were never his thing, they weren’t as bad as Monday but they weren’t close enough to Friday for him. Walking towards his bathroom shedding clothes as he went. He always liked the fact that he had his own bathroom. Not only for the privacy, but for the fact that he didn’t have to share it with his brother. Sam was a mess in every sense of the word, and he had enough product to rival any beauty store. All weird organic products that smelled more like plants than things that belonged in your hair. He slid the curtain aside, turning the nob and turning on the shower portion. He then adjusted the settings on the shower head, because how the water fell was important to Dean, good water pressure was everything when taking a shower. He waited the few seconds for the water to heat up how he liked it then he stepped under the scalding water and let it beat down on him. Sure the angel had healed him, but all in all Dean was still sore from just his everyday motions. The water did wonders for his muscles and he loved the feeling of being swallowed by the steam, as he watched it wrap around him and fill up the room.

He reached for his normal, generic body wash that smelled like apples and lathered up his wash cloth. Sam used to make fun of him for his soap choices, but he liked smelling faintly of fruit, it reminded him of pie and gave him a nice start to his day, not that he would share this with Sam. Or anyone else really, maybe Castiel if he asked…..and that’s when his mood began to dampen. Last night did something to him whether he admitted it or not.

He washed up quickly and turned the water off since his brain betrayed him and kind of killed the mood. He stepped out of the tub and toweled off walking into his room in search of what he should wear for the day. He decided on the red, plaid button up over a plain black v neck t-shirt and some dark wash jeans. He pulled on his work books and grabbed his keys, phone, and wallet and was out the door.

*                             *                             *                             *

Dean worked harder that day than he had in a long time. Working gave him something for his mind and body to do instead of thinking about all the other stuff swimming up in his head. He managed to spin up a whole story to tell Sam about why Castiel would be moving there. He’d tell him that Castiel was a buddy from high school that was going through a rough patch and needed a place to crash for a while until he got on his feet. Sam was a smart kid so he had to play this right. Moving too fast would send up all kinds of red flags, and he wasn’t prepared to tell his brother the truth when he didn’t even know that whole truth himself. All this supernatural crap had him on edge like no other, he felt like some boogie man would jumps out any second. How would he even defend himself against that? From what he read in the journal, bullets won’t drop everything. Some creatures required special bullets. Where does one even buy silver bullets?

“Dean you finished with that one?”

He heard the gruff and grumble from none other than Bobby. Crawling out from under the half dead Honda he was working on, bumping his feet against the legs that stood in front of him. Once on his feet he was met with a scrutinizing glare from his surrogate father. Bobby could tell something was up, Dean knew that, but thankfully it went unmentioned.

“Yeah I’m just about done.”

“Alright well finish that and you can head out for the day. What’s that your 4th car?”

“Heh.” He chuckled. “Yeah it is.”

“Busting your ass in here son good job.” Bobby clapped him on the shoulder and took his leave.

 

*                             *                             *                             *

Dean got a call from none other than Crowley. He’d said it was urgent, and when things are urgent you don’t have a choice but to show your face. So now he found himself sitting in Crowley’s shady trap house waiting for the man to make an appearance. A few of his usual ‘associates’ were seated in the living room watching some reality show and sipping beers and eating Chinese food. The scene looked friendly, which was by far the oddest thing he’d probably see.

Crowley finally emerged, descending stairs that Dean had never gone up, he was terrified about whatever had gone on up there. The Scottish man’s face was twisted in an evil frown, everyone in the room’s head now hang between their shoulders, too afraid to even look in his direction. Dean, however, looked Crowley directly in the eye, he was guilty of no wrongs and he wouldn’t act like he was. It was a habit that of course the man had noticed, he even made mention of it once. Saying Dean could do no wrong by him and he looked like it as well. A very true fact that had kept him safe in such a dangerous line of work. It wasn’t easy, but Dean was very good at hiding his fears, under a tarp that no one could find.

“Come with me Dean.” He motioned to the top of the stairs.

Dean felt his eye twitch at the invitation to go to unknown territories. He’d always assumed that upstairs was only for those who Crowley wanted to discuss things in private, things that no one else could know. He was just a lowly street dealer, nothing big to talk about, so he never thought he’d be taken into a _private_ talk with Crowley. It was all so daunting and unknown, fear wracked through him, but he still found himself following the man up those lonely stairs only few have traveled. He found it to look the complete opposite of what the house had looked like. The living room with its peeling paint and the kitchen with half its wallpaper missing, and tiles stained from years of neglect. This top floor, however, bright white walls, a chandelier hanging from the ceiling in the middle of the wall, new wood floors, it was like he walked into a different dimension. He followed Crowley into a room he had to unlock. The door had a freaking fingerprint scanner! Dean tried his hardest not to gasp at the sight. The door clunked open, though it was painted white, he’d assumed it was made of metal. This room alone was like a fortress. He felt very alarmed walking into the cushioned room, with its comfortable shiny brown leather seats, and the ginormous heavy wooden desk, the safe in the corner, the bright red walls, and the tall filing cabinet. Unsettled and overwhelmed didn’t even cover the half of it.

Crowley walked to the other side of the desk and took a seat in his expensive looking office chair. He pointed to the set of leather chairs, beckoning Dean to sit in one. He did, agonizingly slow, sitting his hands folded in his lap and his left leg bouncing. Crowley let out a big sigh, which usually was a sign that he would start yelling at the top of his lungs, but when the words came out low and matter-of-factly Dean was once again taken by surprise.

“Dean I have to apologize for what happened. I hadn’t anticipated those guys being so….aggressive with you.”

“Did they come back and tell you?”

“They did. And they died for it. Said someone had attacked them after they did what they did to you.”

Dean was sort of expecting this talk to happen. He hadn’t expected it to be in a luxury office space and he also didn’t expect the guys to _die_ for it. He didn’t take it lightly when Crowley stated there would be no trouble amongst his peoples, but with this he thought had gone a little too far for it to be on his behalf. His brain was all sorts of mush by now, forming sentences proving to be a difficult task.

“Why’d they have to die Crowley? I mean sure they roughed me up pretty bad but—“

“And yet here you sit in perfect condition.”

“Well…that’s a bit…complicated.”

“Save it Dean I’m aware of the angel.”

“The—“Dean was straight speechless, the mush of his brain swiped clean and leaving a blank, terrifying slate in its wake. What could he possibly make of this? Crowley, of all the dame people in all the world, he was aware of what Dean had experienced that night. Aware of what Dean was experiencing right now. It didn’t make sense and he didn’t have the sense to make it so. Life for Dean Winchester was hard and surprising it seems.


	4. Can you tell When You're Close?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello Hello! Here's another addition to this wacky story. I saw an interesting thing on the interwebs the other day. About fanfiction of course. Some one suggested making UA (Universe Adjacent) a thing. Honestly this story really fits that. It's got cannonish things to it so I'm gonna go with it! This story is officially Universe Adjacent and I'll tag it as such. No warnings for this chapter. Comments & kudos welcome! Hope you have a great week! xoxo

“What do you mean you _know_? I haven’t told anyone about last night?!” Dean was worried, his breath quickened instantly, his head a swirly mess. This was too much too fast, and he was about to go…

“I’m not explaining the why or the how—just keep in mind that _I’m on your side Dean_. Always on your side.”

“My side?” he was getting loud now and he didn’t even notice. Crowley quirked an eyebrow at the display but didn’t mention it.

“You can trust him. He’s good people. Keep him close.”

“So you know about the other stuff then?” he ran a shaky hand through his hair hoping it would get his brain in order. It didn’t so he kept at it until a spark of control fluttered through him in the midst of Crowley’s silence.

“I know many things Dean. That’s all I can share for now.” He reached for something on the floor that sat next to him behind the desk. Pulling up a hefty briefcase with a padlock on it, he sat it on the desk and slowly slid it in Dean’s direction. “Take this. It’ll be helpful. Whatever you don’t understand about it the angel can explain.”

“How am I supposed to ope—“and before he could finish the other man pulled a set of keys out of a draw. “Crowley—what is going on man?”

“I hate to sound like the protagonist aid in a poorly written action flick….but all will be explained in due time.  Just remember what I said.”

“You gotta give me something other than that. How did you know about him? Were you there?”

“I don’t have to do anything. Now be grateful and go home.”

Despite his obvious mental distress Dean had to remember who he was talking to. Sure Crowley was on his side, whatever the hell that meant, but he was still a very dangerous man who did very bad things. He took the case and mumbled his thanks and leaving the room.

*                             *                             *                             *

Existence for Castiel was exceptionally peculiar, on this day in particular. Dean had somehow found him in his field looking like the entire world was on his shoulders. From what he’d learned from his superiors in a way it was, but Dean wasn’t aware of that yet as far as he knew. Yet here he stood with drooping shoulders, and a hurt frown on his face. He’d given him a cell phone and told him he had a home at his place. They walked through the damp grass, it had rained today, and now they were sitting in his car on the way to his apartment.

He sat there listening to Dean tap on his steering wheel more than he did the music the man was tapping to. Dean had to be the most guarded human he had ever met. But it wasn’t his place to pry or console, he was merely supposed to keep the man alive, and educate him on his purpose throughout this whole ordeal. But he’d be a fool to lie and say he didn’t want to offer solace to the man.

Sitting in mainly silence they finally pulled up to the building where he lived. He only got out of the car once Dean had, and in that same urgent silence he followed him inside, up the elevator, and through the door.

“Now Sammy is gonna be home soon. So I need to tell you my plan.”

Dean’s voice sounded louder than it should have been. He was nervous. Scared. He looked directly at the man as he spoke, not turning away at all, doing his best to comfort him with no words.

“So the story is that you and I went to high school together. We weren’t close but we were pretty cool. We haven’t talked in years and you lost your house and job after you divorced your wife. You reached out to me about a month ago and I said you could take my spare bedroom in exchange for helping out with rent. You got a job at a gas station and—well that’s all I’ve come up with so far. You got all that?”

All the words rumbled out of Dean’s mouth in such a hurry, if it weren’t for his intense ability to pay attention than he wouldn’t have heard half of that. He nodded and committed the tale to memory. Dean turned away, obviously expecting Castiel to follow, so he did. Opening a door in the hallway a room with some boxes and thrown around things was displayed to him. Dean turned back around to say something but stopped midway for reasons Castiel would soon find out about.

“This—Cas come on we talked about this.”

Castiel cocked his head to the side in confusion, he wasn’t aware of what Dean was referring to, but when the other man took a step backwards he was quickly reminded. Personal space. He didn’t understand the strange human concept. Especially in this country, people did odd things during intimacy but were averse to standing close to one another. Humans truly were a peculiar species.

“Anyhow this will be your room. We’ll have to get you a bed or I can make you one. Do you have a preference on size?” Dean ran a hand through his hair.

“No I do not.”

“Alright well I’ll just put something together then. We probably should go shopping or something, so you can have real possessions.”

“I do not require much. What I have is fine.”

“Yeah I get that, but you gotta fit the story. Humans don’t just move around without their things, at least not in normal cases.”

“I was given money, so I can make the purchases you’re suggesting.”

“How much?” he took a pause. “If I may ask?”

He reached into the pockets of his vessel’s trench coat and pulled out the bundles of cash his superiors had given him.

“Wow! What the hell man?! You can’t just carry around that much money on you. What if you get mugged?”

“I can assure you that that would never happen.”

“Well we’re gonna add wallet to the list. Let’s get to shopping before Sam gets home.”

Dean brushed past him to exit the room and Castiel followed.

They went to the Impala and headed to the first plaza that Dean could think of. He’d went to Walmart and brought Castiel some clothes and random odds and ends he assumed he would need. Some things for hygiene, though he’d told Dean he wouldn’t need them. It was all part of the illusion he intended to create for his brother. He needed it to be as real as possible so Sam wouldn’t ask questions. He knew his brother all too well and questions always led to answers for him. He was a smart kid, smarter than Dean felt he could ever be. That’s why he got everything Castiel would need if he was human. Dean knew he’d be using it anyway so it wouldn’t go to waste.

Packing up everything they could in the Impala they headed back to the apartment and Dean got straight to work on cleaning out the extra room. A lot of it was useless garbage that he needed to get rid of anyway.

“Would you like my assistance Dean?” the angel spoke, ruining the silence of the room.

“Yeah—um just can you bag up all that stuff? I need to throw it away since garbage day is tomorrow.”

“Where should I put the full bags?”

“There’s a room in the basement where we put all the garbage. I’ll help you carry it down.” He pointed to the stuffed bags he’d already accumulated. “Those can go down. But we’ll take them in a few.”

Castiel walked over to the bags and disappeared in a gust of wind, only to return empty handed a few seconds later. He quirked an eyebrow at Dean upon his return. Stupid supernatural creature, standing there looking pretty pleased with himself. He shook his head of the thoughts and got back to his work. Castiel jumped in whenever necessary, taking the trash down and helping Dean bag things up. They finished pretty quickly and Dean sat his fists on his hips, quite satisfied by all they got done.

“Alright well Sam should be back soon so you better get out of here.” He handed Castiel his new cellphone and the instructions it came with. “I programmed my number in there. So you can text me if you need something. I’ll let you know you can head over. We should probably get you a car too.”

“I don’t have a need for a vehicle Dean.”

“You can’t just pop in and out like you been doing today. What am I gonna tell Sam? I’m friends with a teleporter?”

“I understand. I will find a way to get a vehicle.”

*                             *                             *                             *

Life for Castiel was peculiar. Dean had called him his friend. Castiel wasn’t sure why after all that he’d experienced today that was the one thing that stood out to him. He wasn’t sure if it was ok to form a friendship with the human in his charge, but he still found joy in the fact that Dean had considered him as such. Outside of his brothers in heaven he had never had a…friend. There weren’t many even in his family that he was particularly close to. He liked to be around a few individuals in his garrison, then there was Gabriel who he was close to. Other than that…he just did his missions like the good soldier he was. He’d been on earth for a short time, but he’d seen so much in it. Now he was walking through town trying to figure out the phone that Dean had given him. The papers told him where the power was, but other than that he had no clue what else to do but follow the prompts on the screen. Now it was asking for an Apple ID and he hadn’t the slightest clue why he needed to identify himself via a fruit. Bypassing the screen he clicked the little image of a phone and found a singular contact, Dean.

He wanted to go back and ask him to show him how to properly how to work the device, but with his brother coming home he couldn’t just go back and ask. He wondered why Dean was adamant about putting up a façade. Why wouldn’t he just tell his brother what was going on? Humans were a tedious and confusing species to him, but he intended on learning everything he could about them.

 

 


	5. Maybe you Might

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey now! Here's another chapter. No real warnings for this one. I got a burst of inspiration over my vacation and I'm pretty much halfway through writing this story. I'm so excited for you guys to read it. Gonna be a long one. Anyway comments and kudos welcome! enjoy! xoxo

  
Life for Dean Winchester was exciting. Not always in the happy traditional sense, sometimes the excitement was the farthest thing he wanted to be. He just wanted to live a quiet and simple life with his brother, where he could pay all his bills on time, have food on their table, and have some extra cash for a semblance of a social life. In order for him to get these things he had to make a lot of sacrifices, which found him in his current lifestyle of lying and dealing.

On this particular day though, life was exciting in the best ways. Here he is lounging on his couch in his ugliest boxers, and a t-shirt that was at least a decade old. He’s got a rare day off and he’s marothoning Dr. Sexy so of course this is the best day ever. Sam comes bursting in the apartment waving a paper in the air and babbling madly with a smile on his face.

“Sam what the actual fuck?” he hollers trying to make sense of his brother’s incoherent screams.

“Dean! I got into Stanford!”

Standford? All the way out in Cali? Dean hadn’t even known his brother applied to a school all the way out there. But he couldn’t let him see his disappointment. He wouldn’t guilt trip Sam into going to school somewhere closer, just because that’s what Dean wanted. He was selfish, but not that selfish to hinder his brother’s dreams.

“Woah! That’s awesome man!” he wrapped his brother in his arms with a fake smile on his face.

“Isn’t it? They have an awesome law program. They even want to give me a full ride!”

Full ride huh? Well there goes Dean’s wishes of supporting Sam. All that money, all those risks, and in the end Sam doesn’t even need him. He knew his brother would still need money for room and board and a little spending allowance so that he could have the full college experience. All the other kids would get stuff like what and Dean intended on providing that for his brother. He wanted nothing but normalcy for him.

“You’re too damn smart for your own good. We gotta celebrate!”

“Yeah I mean—what do you wanna do?” he asked, his smile as wide as ever. He hadn’t seen his brother this blatantly happy since his father had abandoned them on that 4th of July and Dean took him out to a field near Bobby’s house and set off those fireworks. Almost set the whole damn forest on fire, but hell it was a good time anyway.

“We can go out to dinner at that vegan spot you like so much.” Dean went to the refrigerator to get another much needed beer.

“You wanna go to a vegan spot?” Sam quirked an eyebrow at this.

“Tonight ain’t about what I want. It’s your night.” he popped the cap and took a long swig from the cool glass bottle. The slush it made in his mouth was grounding him. He had the worst coping mechanisms imaginable, but if it ain’t broke don’t fix it.  “But Sammy—I wanted to talk to you about something.”

“Alright shoot.” Sam sat down at their kitchen table. Placing his hands on the table in front of him and eyes trained on Dean.

His brother’s open and willing face made it hard to lie. Dean was sitting on the biggest secret possible and yet he still needed to lie. Sammy was smart, he could handle going to law school. To add all the supernatural crap that Dean was aware of now, on top of all what he needed to do with school would be too much. Sam needed to go to Stanford with a clear head, so he could accomplish his goals and achieve his dreams, the whole nine.

“I’ve got a friend from school. He recently got divorced and his wife took everything. He’s got his car and a few things to his name and he needs somewhere to stay until he can get back on his feet. We have an extra room and I told him I’d talk to you about it before I tell him yes.”

“Tell him yes.”

Just like that? It couldn’t be just that easy.

“I haven’t seen the guy in years, but I really do feel for him ya know? I just don’t want you to be uncomfortable with a practical stranger living here.”

“It’s fine with me Dean. I mean I’ll only be here until August and then I’ll be at school. If you trust this guy and you wanna help him then I’m fine with it.”

Nothing was ever this easy.

“You sure?” he pressed, because it was just ingrained in him to do so. He needed Sammy’s approval just as much, if not more, than he needed Dean’s.

“What’s the guy’s name?”

“Castiel. It’s a weird name and he’s kind of an awkward guy.”

*                             *                             *                             *

Awkward was an understatement. After the conversation with Sam, Dean called Castiel, the guy barely knew how to work the phone. Took him a few tries to figure out where to speak into and where to listen from. He chuckled at the angel’s frustration. It was entirely too cute, and Dean instantly regretted the thought and tossed it out of his mind. He told Castiel to arrive early afternoon the following day and Castiel told him he’d acquired a vehicle. He feared where the angel actually gotten it from, but decided to cross that bridge when he came to it.

Now he found himself sitting in some hippy dippy joint with Sam and his new girl, celebrating his acceptance to Stanford. They ordered their weird rabbit food, and Dean ordered the only thing that sounded good to him, mac and cheese. Sam thought it would be hilarious to inform him that vegans don’t eat actual cheese and that his dish was made with cashew cheese, after the waitress had taken their orders and left. If Jessica wasn’t there he’d have no shame or opposition to strangling his brother in public. This dish better be good if he was paying 12 damn dollars for it.

The night was going pretty well, Dean got to talking to Jessica about his Baby, apparently she was into classic cars. He watched the two of them talk and banter flirtatiously with each other while he sat back and enjoyed his mac and cheese that actually wasn’t half bad. But of course like everything in Dean Winchester’s life something always has to go wrong.

“You think Mom would’ve been proud of me?” Sam asked, bringing Dean’s good mood to a screeching halt.

He wasn’t mad, let not the frown on his face convey that he was angry because he wasn’t. He was hurt, upset, thrown off. He was upset that Sam even needed to ask something like that. He was hurt that his mother was gone before Sam even got to know her. Thrown off that this question was obviously digging a hole in Sam’s brain for so long that he chose a time such as this to ask it.

“Of course she would Sammy. She’d be real proud and beyond happy for you right now. Dad too.”

See Dean knew his mother, so he could speak for her. Sure he was 4 when she was whisked away from them in that fire, but he remembered her vividly. He remembered her tender smiles, and equally soft touches. He remembered the way her laugh took over the atmosphere in a room and filled him with impenetrable joy. He remembered her cooking, her smell, her singing. He remembered all the happy memories he had with her. He remembered how his Dad was before the fire too. He was an easy-going, loving father before the stern task-master he became after her death. If his mom had never died then he’d still be that man today, not the crazy talking, drunken fool that he was until his death.

For the rest of the night all of Dean’s thoughts were sour, be he’d rather die than show them on his face. Tonight was a celebration, regardless of the dark turn it took for only a few moments. Once dinner was done and Dean payed the hefty check they left and took Jessica home before they made their way back to the apartment. Dean waited until Sam was in his room for the night before he grabbed a new bottle of Jack and went to his own room, with one goal in mind. Forget it all until tomorrow.

*                             *                             *                             *

Life for Dean Winchester was surprisingly easy today. Too easy that he was now filled with paranoia and his brain littered with negative thoughts of what could possibly go wrong despite the light and easy motion of the day. He’d called Cas to head over once he finished work at the shop. He’d barely walked through his front door when the whooshing of wings fluttered to his right and there Cas was in all his accounting glory.

“Dude you gotta stop with the flying. Knocking is an essential human tool, and ya know walking.”

“I apologize Dean.” The angel quirked his head to the side.

“Luckily Sam wasn’t home. I know this is all new for you, just uh try to remember next time.”

“I’ve acquired a vehicle.”

“Alright well let’s get this show on the road.”

That had been somewhere around 3 hours ago. Now Dean was helping Castiel set up his new room. Sam got home about a half hour ago. Introductions went about as well as Dean hoped they would and now they worked in comfortable silence, save for Dean’s iPod playing music in the bathroom. Putting the finishing touches on the bed, Dean tried to not enjoy the domestic feeling of it too much. Sam was there and all their work was for a lie Dean felt necessary to embellish. Castiel wasn’t his friend, more like his supernatural keeper.

“Well I think we’re done.” He stepped back into the doorway and admired all of their work. “I’m gonna go grab a beer. Do you guys want one?”

Sam immediately agreed, but Castiel was a little hesitant before he nodded slowly. Dean suspected he did it purely for the sake of not standing out. He was trying to take this human thing seriously.  He leaves the two of them in the room reluctantly, it’s silly to want to avoid them being alone, but he can’t help it. He really doesn’t want Castiel slipping up and causing Sam to ask questions.

Once he has the 3 beers with their caps popped and in hand he scurries back to the room. He finds Sam enthusiastically telling Castiel about his acceptance to Stanford and all about why he wants to study law. It’s a bit ironic and sorta funny with Dean’s warped sense of humor that his brother is going to school for law using the money Dean acquired illegally to fund his way. He chuckles to himself as he hands out the glass bottles. If luck continues to be on his side than Sam will never find out where Dean got all the money for his room and board. Sam takes a swig as Dean does, Castiel mimics the motion and blinks quickly at the taste. It amuses him as the grimace forms on his face, maybe the angel has never had alcohol before. Devious plans form in Dean’s mind at that.

“Well glad you’re settled in Castiel. It’ll be nice to have some company outside of Dean.” Sam smiles and offers a lopsided smile to the angel.

“I’m glad to be here Sam. Adjusting hasn’t been easy. There’s so many things I have to learn.”

“We’re here to help with whatever you need.”

Dean nods his agreeance at the statement. He wants to help Castiel since he’s doing the same for them. Even though it’s due to orders up in Heaven he’s still going out of his way to respect Dean’s wishes of keeping Sam in the dark. Sam takes his leave and goes to his own room, pausing to clap a hand on Dean’s shoulder, no doubt he’s going to bury his head in his books.

Without Sam’s presence the silence of the room sets in. Dean’s iPod stopped playing a while ago, it probably died. But the lack of noise isn’t uncomfortable. Dean doesn’t know what to do from here. He figures he could probably try and give Castiel some more pointers on common human things, but he doesn’t know where to start.

“Let me show you how to work this phone.” He sits on the side of the full sized bed they set up for the angel.

He taps the space next to him, beckoning Castiel to join him. And when he does he sits too close, his thigh lining up perfectly next to Dean’s, their shoulders pressed together. The heat radiating from Castiel is astounding, he’s so damned warm. Dean’s first instinct is to put distance between them, but he doesn’t want to make the effort. He’s surprised that he likes them being so close. Swallowing down his wariness he goes about showing Castiel everything about the phone. It doesn’t take long and the angel is a quick learner. Dean finds himself laughing at Castiel’s confusion over recording a voicemail.

“Do I talk to the voice?”

“It’s just a greeting so whoever is calling can know that you missed their call.”

“What am I supposed to say?”

“Some people say sorry or something, I just say ‘it’s Dean you know what to do’.”

“What if they don’t know what to do?”

“Most people know how to leave a voicemail man.” He laughs outright.

He watches the angel fiddle around with the phone pressing the screen every so often until it prompts him to say his voicemail greeting.

“This is Castiel, I can’t come to the phone, the voice will tell you what to do.” He says in that painfully pleasant gravelly voice of his.

Dean waits until he’s done before he laughs again, quieter than he had prior. Who knew it would be so much fun to help an angel of the Lord record his voicemail greeting? Castiel cocks his head to the side and his gaze is trained on Dean as he’s trying to figure out why the man is laughing at him.

“I did what you told me to do.”

“I know, it’s just—nothing man you did good.”

And just like that the silence reappeared. Although it was much tenser than it previously was. Castiel’s gaze flickered all over Dean’s face, like he was looking for something that he couldn’t yet find and wouldn’t voice out loud. It makes Dean slightly uncomfortable to be analyzed to deeply. He shifts on the bed slightly, but he can’t pull his eyes away from the blue blaze that’s peering straight through him.

“So I’m gonna—um take Sammy shopping for his prom stuff. We’ll be back soon so you should stay here and—I don’t know, scour the internet or something.”

“What is on this internet?”

“The real question is what’s not on the internet.”

He takes his leave after that going straight for Sam’s room hoping he can take him out of there before he says or does something he’s going to regret under the gaze of that angel. Of course he finds his brother hunched over a thick open textbook and a pen in his hand.

“Hey Sammy. You busy?”

“Not really. What’s up Dean? Castiel settling in ok?”

“Yeah he’s good. But I was wondering if you wanted to go shopping for your prom stuff today.” Dean tried his best to sway the topic from their very interesting guest. He knew that the more they talked about Castiel, Sam would have way too many questions and Dean wouldn’t have a lie for them all.

*                             *                             *                             *

Shopping with Sam was a fucking nightmare! He was too damn indecisive for Dean’s lack of patience. What little patience he did have was being whittled away, bug chunks at a time. If his brother wasn’t worried about the cost he was worried about his hair clashing with the colors. If it wasn’t that he was worried about what Jessica would like. The color she had chosen for her dress was a deep olive color. Dean hadn’t seen the dress but she had given Sam a swatch of the fabric so that it would be easier for him to pick a matching shirt.

 At first his brother had thought a white suite would look good, until he came out of the dressing stall and Dean pretended to dry heave. They argued for a while over that for a while before Sam finally backed down and agreed to do gray. Now he was trying on his 5th jacket and pant combo, sauntering out of the stall like he owned Wall Street. Dean didn’t understand how or why they’d gone through this 5 times. He couldn’t tell the difference between any of the garments. All the fight had drained from his body and he just sat back glaring at Sam as he came in and out of the stall.

On his 6th trip Dean felt his phone ring in his pocket. He rolled his eyes looking at the screen and seeing Castiel’s name. He picked it up bracing himself for the angel to call him about something silly and due to his lack of knowledge for basic human things.

“Heya Castiel what’s up?” he sighed.

“There are demons outside of your apartment building Dean. Keep you and your brother away from here until I can deal with them.”

Dean’s head immediately snapped up at this, his eyes trained on the closed door where his brother was currently changing behind. His head began to spin and bile rose in his throat. There wasn’t enough air in here and he tried his best not to gasp out loud. He was panicking, at literally the worst time. Closing his eyes he took a few deeps breathes trying to settle himself. Sam was bound to come out of that room any second now and if he saw Dean in this state he would immediately tune into it and start his 3rd degree questioning. Dean’s lie que wasn’t prepared for something like this.

“What should we do?”

“Wherever you are stay there. I’ve already contacted others in my garrison so I will not be fighting alone. We will handle this.”

Dean suddenly felt an all too familiar emotion well up from his very core. Uselessness. Here was this angel risking his safety for the sake of him and his brother who were perfect strangers. Sure this was the angel’s mission or whatever, but he couldn’t help but feel like he should be of some help. Sure demons were dangerous, ravenous beings who were quite hard to kill, but he wanted, no needed to help. Purpose, Dean needed a purpose. Up until this point it had been to keep Sammy safe and give him the life he didn’t have. That job was slowly being torn from him and being taken over by a beautiful blue eyed being.

*                             *                             *                             *

Life for Dean Winchester was impossible. He was more than angry due to his earlier thoughts. He didn’t like feeling useless. It dug a hole through him and made a home inside him. Making its roots throughout him and replacing the veins of steel he’d built up over the years. He was supposed to be impenetrable at this point, and he wasn’t. Anger was one of the few feelings he felt he could express freely and he couldn’t even do that at this point. He didn’t want to send up any red flags for his brother to see.

Sam successfully found everything he needed for his special night, and Castiel had succeeded in getting rid of the demons. What the hell had Dean succeeded in?

Once they got back to the apartment Dean made sure to walk closely behind his brother, his eyes flickering at their surroundings. Sure Cas had said that all the demons were gone, but what if they missed one? They took the elevator instead of the stairs and Dean made sure he exited first. Taking no chances.

“Thanks for this Dean. I really appreciate you getting all this stuff for me.” he rubbed nervously at the back of his neck. “And for putting up with me.”

“Yeah well expect it to be returned when I make you guys take a billion pictures for me.”

“Dean—“

“Nope Sammy. Karma is a lovely lady.”

They parted ways soon after, Sam lugging all his bags to his room and Dean grabbing a trusty bottle of Jack and going to his. Passing by Castiel’s room he paused only a little even though he knew the angel was nowhere to be found. Once in his room he shut the door behind himself and stripped down to his boxers. He just popped the cap on his bottle ready to drown in it when his phone began to ring.

“Hey Crowley what’s up.”

“Dean, glad you could pick up. I’ve got a job for you.”


	6. The Faces up on the Wall

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey hey there! Here's another addition to the story. Warnings for some violence. Not nearly as gruesome as you may think. Side note: of course my brain kicked out some new ideas that I couldn't help but jot down. So many good things are happening here. As always thanks for reading! comments and kudos welcome welcome. Enjoy! xoxo

Life for Castiel was peculiar. He’d been seeking word from those positioned above him for quite some time and no further information had been given. In due time he was told. Due time? He hadn’t the slightest clue what that meant. He knew even less as to what he could do about it. Never in all the millenniums he’d existed had he ever been given a mission without so much as a reason why. It frustrated him to be sitting in the room that he and the humans in his charge had set up without a thing to do. He took a glance at his phone and a look out the window to see it was nearly 6 am and the sun was making its way through the clouds. Based on what Dean had shared with him about their schedules Sam would be up first and Dean usually followed.

His hope was that least the humans would give him something to do. It wasn’t so much that he couldn’t stand waiting, he was an infinitely patient being, he was made with this trait. His problem lied with the fact that he was also made to follow orders, to carry out the will of his Father. Not to wander aimlessly through life seeking a purpose like many humans did. He didn’t think he was above them, just different, engineered for a different reason then he and his brethren had been. Unlike most of his siblings Castiel didn’t mind those differences, it was what made humanity as fascinating as it is.

Sometime had past as he was wrapped up in his thoughts and he could hear movement throughout the apartment. The brothers had awakened and started their day. He got up from his seated position, and went to Dean’s room.

“Castiel what the hell man?!”

Dean was emerging from his bathroom, just have taken a shower if his damp skin and wet hair were anything to go by. His lower half wrapped in a towel.

“Hello Dean.”

“You can’t just walk in without knocking. Didn’t we talk about this?”

“I did and you didn’t respond.”

“Okay,” he sighed, “Why are you still wearing the accountant chic look? Did you try on any of the clothes I gave you?”

“I thought that was just a part of the act. I wasn’t aware that I was required to wear them.”

“Yeah man you gotta wear ‘em. Can you go change please? We gotta meet up with my boss anyway. You can’t come in dressed like that.”

“How should I be dressed?”

“Listen, let me get ready and I’ll come to your room once Sammy leaves out.”

Castiel listened to Dean’s request and went right back to sitting on the edge of his bed. It didn’t take as long as he assumed it would before he heard Sam yelling his goodbye’s and Dean coming into his room shortly after. The man walked until he was directly standing in front of him.

“Alright Castiel listen,” he took a deep breath before continuing, “I’m sure you already know if not then here it is. I’m a mechanic yes, but that’s just my day-to-day job, my 9-5, I’m a drug dealer on the side. The man I’m going to meet today is a basically my boss. He says he’s got a job for me and when that happens I’ve gotta go to his place and receive instructions.”

“Will I be coming with you?”

“With all these demons running around apparently trying to take us out I’d appreciate it if you did, but if you got important Heavenly things to do then by all means I won’t keep you.”

“My instructions were to watch over you, and by extension watch over your brother.”

“Then let’s get you dressed. You’ve gotta lose the suit.” Dean turned and began rummaging through the draws of the dresser he’d stored clothes in that he intended for Castiel to wear.

Castiel began removing his clothes. First the coat, then the jacket, tie, and shirt. Dean finally turned around just as he was about to go for the pants. He stared wide eyed, in shock maybe, Castiel wasn’t all too sure. He still wasn’t good with emotional cues of humans. In his hands, Dean held a bundle of clothes, Castiel took a few steps forward and took them since Dean seemed to be stuck where he stood.

“I’ll um—just go—while you dress. Let me know when you’re done and we can head out.”

Castiel was left alone once again as Dean made his hurried exit out of the room, the door shutting loudly behind him. He finished removing his clothes and replaced them with new ones. Once he finished he looked at his reflection in the mirror that Dean had hung on the back of the door. The shirt seemed to fit well and he liked that it was black, the jeans also a dark color, he was pleased with his appearance. Grabbing his wallet and cell phone, stuffing them in his pockets he left the room once again in search of Dean.

*                             *                             *                             *

Dean made sure to let Crowley know beforehand that the angel would be accompanying him on whatever job he had for him. The last thing he wants is for the man to be surprised and havoc break out. The man readily agreed and told him the angel would make the job that much easier for him. He didn’t want to think too much into that little tip, his mind had a habit of getting away from him lately.

They walked through the front door with its peeled white paint probably chock full of lead and God knows what else. Castiel was right behind him, a little too close for Dean’s comfortability, but now was not the time or the place to openly complain about personal space. Once inside a few heads turned with steely faces at the new intruder. There were less guys in the small living room than Dean was use to. It was such a small thing to notice, but Dean’s life and his father’s teaching had told him that noticing the small stuff can be the determining factor between life and death. All the faces were familiar to him, which was a relief in itself. Just then one of the usual goons descended the stares and motioned for them to follow him up them. They were led to the door with the fingerprint scanner and walked right through once it was opened.

There Crowley sat behind his large desk, in his fancy chair, wearing a suite similar to the one Dean had seen him in the other day. It was almost like he had never left. The state of the room was as pristine as it had been the last time, and Crowley made the same motion he had before for them to sit in the almost too comfortable chairs.

“Dean. Angel.” He nodded at the both of them with a smile on his face. He hands were folded on top of the desk like he was about to cut a deal with them. “I have a proposition for the two of you. I’m sure that this is well within both of your skill sets.”

“What are you?” Castiel’s voice rang through the room like a tidal wave. This was the first he’d spoken since they left the house and it startled Dean enough to twitch in his seat.

“Does it matter?” Crowley laughed and trained his eyes on Dean. “Dean I’m sure you’re aware now that your father was a hunter. He tracked down and killed the things that go bump in the night. He saved a lot of people in his time, and he trained you and your brother to do the same in his place. And this is the reason I called you here today Dean. I have an opportunity for you.”

The word opportunity rang two ways in Dean’s mind. On one end it could be really dark stuff, requiring Dean to risk his life to kill some kind of monster. He would do it, helping people was kind of his week spot, and that’s the one that scared him the most. On the other end it could be just another drug drop that maybe involved a little danger. He’d be lying if he was he didn’t hope for the later.

“What you got for me?”

“Always the good soldier hmm? I’ve gotten word—don’t ask me how—that a couple vampires are kidnapping and turning people in a town not too far from here. All I need you to do is kill them and retrieve the locked briefcase they have in their possession. You’ll be paid for this of course, much higher than your regular pay since you’ll be doing much more than you usually do. Since you have your feathered friend with you this shouldn’t be more than a walk in a park.”

“When do we leave?” he could feel Castiel’s eyes on him as he asked the question. A look that wondered why Dean didn’t ask more than that. He had more questions of course but the response had been automatic, he’d said yes so many times to so many bad things. Why not say yes to something that would actually help people?

Crowley gave Dean a manila folder containing all the information that he would need for this ‘opportunity’ and he intended to read it as soon as he was in the comfort of his home.

*                             *                             *                             *

“Dean what is he?” Castiel asked as soon as Dean locked the door behind them. Crowley didn’t do much talking after giving Dean the info and the meeting had ended quickly.

“I don’t have a clue man, I assumed he was a red blooded man like me.” Dean rubbed a hand over his face as he walked into his kitchen, no doubt in search of a bottle.

“Do you really intend to drink alcohol right now?”

“Yeah I am. Got a problem with that?”

“I thought we were going to go over the plan for this hunt.”

“And we will. Me drinking doesn’t change that.” Dean reached for a glass, sitting it on the counter before popping the top off his Jack and pouring three fingers in. “We’ve gotta get this all settled before Sammy comes home.”

They then sat at the kitchen table huddled over the file and John’s journal trying to come up with the best tactic on how to go about this. They had to be beyond smart about this due to the fact that only 4 of the vampires were confirmed to be in this camp, who knows how many others would be present on that night.

“According to Dad’s journal any more than 4 of these suckers is considered a nest. We’d need more manpower that we don’t have for a nest.”

“There may be only two of us physically, but I assure you I count for more than a man.”

Dean scoffed at Castiel’s smugness. Dude was being sassy since they got home. Normally he’d find that kind of attitude annoying and he’d be ready to punch a guy in the face for that, but with Castiel he found it kind of amusing. The guy went from adorable to sassy murderer in no time at all.

“Whatever you say man. Let’s wrap this up. Sam should be home soon. We should leave super early in the morning.”

“What will you tell your brother?”

“I’ve got that all figured out angel.” He winked. Such a flirty and involuntary motion on his part. He didn’t mean to do that, but it just came out. The angels sideways head told Dean that he hadn’t the slightest clue as to what Dean meant with that motion. “I’m gonna tell him I’m visiting Ellen, a family friend, we’ll be in her neck of the woods anyway so I could probably stop by. You’ll be in court battling your nasty divorce.”

“So he will not know that we’re together.”

“Now you’re catching on.” he grinned, a genuine smile that felt foreign on his features.

*                             *                             *                             *

Life for Dean Winchester might not be so bad right now after all. Sammy ate the lie up like it was a slice of pie fresh out the oven. A small part of him felt badly for lying to his brother when in reality he was doing something insanely dangerous, but it was overridden by the fact that the less Sam knew the safer he would be. In Dean’s mind it all made sense, like John had done he wanted to shield those closest to him about what really lurked around shadowy corners. Sam could live the peaceful successful life that he was meant to have and Dean would settle for nothing else.

Castiel had left earlier to do who knows what while Dean loaded up the Impala with his bag of clothes and toiletries and another bad of weaponry. He was physically ready but his mind was going a million miles a second with the strategies they’d discussed and all the possible ways this could go wrong. He’d thumbed through his Father’s journal several times and read all the entries involving the filthy blood suckers until if he closed his eyes he could recite the words right off the page. It helped that his father’s handwriting was pristine, that being one of the traits that Dean picked up and his brother didn’t.

Once he was all loaded up and ready to go he hopped in the car with one last text to Sam letting him know he was on his way. He’d sent another text to Castiel letting him know the same. The angel had agreed to meet him on his way through the 5 hour drive. He’d sent a final text to Jo letting her know he’d be out in their neck of the woods and would stop by and expecting free food and booze when he got there. He knew she’d be fuming and calling him all kinds of names outside of his own for his lack of communication all this time.

He drove for about two hours listening to a Zepplin mix tape he’d made back in high school before he heard a sound of flapping wings. Turning to investigate the noise wasn’t necessary since he was all but use to it by now.

“Hello Dean.” Came the gravelly voice filled with storms and promise.

“Hey Castiel.”

“We seem to be right on schedule. How are you feeling about this?”

Was the angel trying to make small talk right now? That seemed a bit out of character for his usual stoic ‘I’m an Angel of the Lord’ attitude that he clung to. Castiel had a way of keeping Dean on his emotional toes like no other. Yesterday he’d been all business like and now he was trying to have a casual conversation with him.

*                             *                             *                             *

Existence for Castiel was frustrating and peculiar. Castiel had had the weirdest thought the other day during his daily meditation and trying to receive word from the heavens. With the strange man Dean called boss giving him a task he had not refused, he had to make a choice. Either stop Dean from going or go with him. He was sent here to watch over this man and if he was going off to hunt monsters then he had no other option really, but to go with him. Castiel had had his fair share of vampire killing long ago on his last voyage to Earth so he was familiar and more than capable of taking them down, Dean however was human as well as new to this life. He wanted Dean to trust him, and rely on him as much as possible, but Dean was headstrong if nothing else and wouldn’t simply do things because Castiel said so. Forming a bond with him would be the only way to make Dean more amiable. While Dean was getting ready Castiel went to the local library, he was aware that these buildings were purposed to hold large amounts of human information so that if one should seek it they would find answers. In more modern of eras such as now many turned to the internet for such copious amounts of information, but Castiel wasn’t sure how to navigate it so he turned to a simpler solution.

Once he got there he received a text from Dean letting him know that he was about to start driving. That didn’t give him much of a time frame for his research purposes. Luckily Castiel was a very fast reader. He thought it would help him go faster if he reached out to an actual human for guidance as well as the literature. Charlie, the girl who gave him a ride his first day here, had said that if he needed help she was willing to offer her assistance. Now was a good time for that. It took him a while but he managed to send her a text.

You: Hello Charlie, this is Castiel the man you helped on the side of the highway not too long ago. I was wondering if you were still willing to help me with something.

She had replied almost instantly.

Charlie: yeah Castiel what can I do for you? I’m actually surprised to hear from you.

You: Is this a bad time? I have a new person in my life and I was wondering how I can adequately communicate with them to form trust.

Castiel had finally found a book about communication with the help of one of the librarians. It was a book about making friends and forming healthy relationships with those around you. It contained a great deal of tips and sample conversations that you can have with someone you’ve just met.

Charlie: Is this someone you like? Romantically?

You: I don’t think you can categorize this as romantic. I’m not sure what counts as romantic either. But I have to work with this person and they’re in my charge.

Charlie: So like a work thing. I see. Well try making small talk. And of course be yourself. That’s how you get people to trust you. Do you want to be friends with this person?

You: I assume from my research that things would be easier if we were friends so I suppose I do want a friendship.

Charlie: Good good. Friendships in my experience are much easier than professional ones. More room to be who you are. Try asking questions to know more about the person. And try taking a mental note on their body language.

You: I will do that. I must get going but thank you so much. You’ve been a great help.

Charlie: Sure thing. I’m invested in this now so keep me updated and feel free to ask me any questions you have. J ttyl

*                             *                             *                             *

“I’m feeling alright man. Just trying to keep to the plan as much as I can.” Dean answered.

Castiel was taking note of every little move that Dean made. He noticed his hands gripping the steering wheel particularly tight, the muscles in his face flexing as he clenched his teeth, there were even a few beads of sweat forming on his forehead. In addition to the book he’d read about communication he read about body language. Dean was showing all the signs of nervousness. He wanted to put the man at ease, let him know that there was nothing to be worried about. Not knowing how to put these thoughts into words he simply places a supportive hand on the man’s shoulder, hoping that all he wanted to say could be said with the touch.

It must’ve worked at least a little because Dean’s shoulders relaxed from their tense state and his hands loosened their grip. He felt a swell of what can only be pride at the fact that he had such a positive impact on the man. Castiel wasn’t too sure why he wanted to put the man at ease and make things better for him, he could only assume it was tied to his love for humanity despite the hateful things some of his brothers had to say about their kind. They had their faults of course, taking free will too far often times, but through all the bad there was still light to be found and Castiel could make peace with that.

“Your father trained you for things such as this, as well as mine did for me. We will succeed.” He did his best to offer verbal solace.

“Yeah I hear you.”

And with that silence fell on the car once again. Castiel didn’t know what else to say and he could sense that Dean was still a bit nervous. While he racked his brain for ways to help the man he hadn’t even noticed that they arrived. Dean pulled the car into a parking lot of a motel. He instructed Castiel to wait in the car until he returned with the key so they could unload the car and turn in for the night. Dean returned shortly and they did just that. Castiel watched as Dean took his jacket and shoes off before taking a sitting position on the bed with his legs stretched out in front of him.

“Castiel take off your coat and stay awhile.” Dean spoke as he reached for the remote to turn on the television.

“Only awhile?”

“It’s a saying.” He chuckled. “It means to relax. Take your coat off and shoes and lay down. That drive took longer than expected with all that construction traffic.”

Castiel did as Dean said and took the same position he did. He didn’t see the difference in between standing and sitting. He wasn’t tense so he saw no need to relax, but Dean wanted him to be comfortable so he would try his best to appear so. He took his phone to ask Charlie her thoughts on this. As he was typing away he could feel Dean’s eyes on him.

“Doing some fancy finger work over there. You texting your girlfriend?”

“If by girlfriend you mean a romantic partner than no. But she is a woman who I believe is my friend.”

“Making human friends? That’s good. Just make sure you can trust them before you go giving too much information.”

Dean seemed to be giving him advice, which could only mean that he currently had Castiel’s best interests at heart. By that he could only assume that Dean thought Castiel valued his opinion, which is what friends do right?

*                             *                             *                             *

Dean said what was on his mind before he even gave it some thought. Of course the angel didn’t have a girlfriend but he couldn’t help the little pang of jealousy that surfaced within him. He also didn’t want to dive too much into that. They watched tv for the better part of 3 hours. Only exchanging words when Castiel has a question about something in the show. Dean was only paying it minimal attention since his thoughts elsewhere. His mind was on the case and his father. He regretted so much of his past opinions of his dad. The long periods of time they’d spent at Bobby’s when John dropped them off Dean had spent his time being angry at the man. He thought his father didn’t want him and his brother and he constantly found himself wondering what they—he could’ve possibly done wrong to drive the man away. Knowing John was off trying to save people who had little chance of saving themselves changed Deans view of his father entirely. He’d wished he’d known all of this prior to his passing if only to let his dad know he was proud of him.

“Dean.” The angel spoke tearing him away from his cluttered thoughts. “It’s late now. You probably should get some sleep.”

“Yeah you’re right about that.” He said getting up from his bed.” I’m gonna take a shower. Do angels bathe?”

“No my grace keeps my vessel in a clean state.”

“Grace? Vessel?”

“My grace is what gives me my power and life force. The vessel is the body I’m housed in.”

“So you’re wearing a person? Like a meat suit? That’s kinda—messed up.” He frowned.

“Demons take possession of humans as well. They can just take over a body at any time. Angels need permission to enter. The man I’m inhabiting permitted me use of his body.”

“Oh—alright. I guess that’s a little better. So he’s like awake in there?” Dean wondered how the angel managed to find someone as gorgeous as the man he was wearing. If he’d found someone less attractive it would solve a lot of Dean’s inner issues with the angel.

“He’s still here yes. His soul is here. He’s not aware as you would think of it.” He took a long pause, his eyes squinted and his head cocked to the side in thought. “It’s probably similar to a comatose state. How sometimes the person can still hear people around them but they’re not conscious.”

“So can he hear what’s going on?”

“No he’s just aware that he’s not alone in this body.”

“Hmm what kind of dude are you in? I don’t think I could just let someone be me ya know?”

“It’s not for everyone. And being that I am a particularly high level of angel not everyone could house me. He’s a man with great faith. And a strong human.”

“He’s very trusting. I mean who knows what you could be doing with his body ya know? What if you were gonna wreak havoc on anyone you meet then hop out and dude has to go to jail.”

“Well that’s the difference between an Angel of the Lord and a demon Dean.” He sighed, clearly trying not to get upset.

Dean didn’t mean to offend the angel he was merely stating a point. Not everyone, no matter the species, was out to do good. He suspected though they were angels there had to be at least one in the bunch. Lucifer himself was once an angel. Castiel was clearly offended though and before he made it worse Dean decided to try and fix it. 

“Sorry about that man. I was just curious is all. I’m gonna go take that shower now.” And with that Dean grabbed some clothes and fled the scene.

*                             *                             *                             *

_He dreamt of soft hair and eyes like the ocean. Everything appeared to him in broken pieces from his subconscious. Soft touches, warm glances, hands that made him feel worth it. Strength held him up, determination grounded him, and sheer will kept him breathing. He was safe with this one. Words spoken too soft to hear what was being said, but he could feel the compassion within them. He could smell the encouragement, taste the belief this person had in him._

_Then he saw fire, consuming him, consuming the angel as he reached out his hand to pull Dean to safety. He’d risked his life for a human. Did Dean deserve it? The sacrifice? The effort? Out of all of those that needed help….what did Dean do to deserve it now? Who was he to be under Heaven’s watch? He was a boy who turned man too fast. He was a man with flaws longer than a politician’s list of sins. He felt he was a sin himself. A man build of anger, lust, pride, that stood tall even when he felt so small. He was ruled by emotions he’d never show, bogged down by thoughts he’d never release._

_Who was he to deserve to be saved?_

Dean woke gasping for air, feeling like he’d actually been in that fire. His eyes roaming the room quickly taking in his surroundings and making sure he was safe, it took a few seconds to realize there was a hand on his shoulder. His gaze slowly trailing up the arm the hand was attached to finding the trench coat angel with widen eyes looking back at him.

“You were having a nightmare. I felt it necessary to wake you up.” 

“Yeah—thanks.” And that was all Dean would say about that. He barely knew what the dream was about himself. He knew the angel and him were getting to know each other intimately and then everything went to shit. Even as he sat there the bad parts of the dream faded the more awake he became. He simply wanted to shake it off and go back to sleep.

“Do you require further assistance?”

“No I think I’m good.” Dean chuckled within himself. For someone who lacked a lot of basic human knowledge he had a perfect grasp on language. It was a little creepy that Castiel apparently watched Dean while he slept, but his mother’s words suddenly rang in his head. With that he was happy that the angel watched over him. He was grateful. Not only for waking him up from that twisted dream, but for also relaxing him enough that he eventually fell back asleep.

*                             *                             *                             *

Dean woke up pretty early the next morning. He peered at his phone once he dug it from its place under his pillow. It was 7am, about an hour earlier than he planned on rising, but it had it’s perks. He could take longer to get ready, taking his time and hope it calmed his nerves. He sat up stretching his arm above his head as his body felt he needed, a long and loud yawn leaving his lips. He felt surprisingly rested, probably due to the angel’s reassurance from last night, but he wasn’t going to think more on that. He rose from the bed he’d slept in feeling better than he had in awhile, taking a side glance at the angel to find him looking back at him. There he was sitting in the same position that he was last night.

“So angels don’t sleep?”

“I do not require it.”

“How do you rest then?”

“I feel fine Dean, if that’s what you’re wondering.”

Dean turned his glance on his bag of clothing, feeling his face heating up. Sure that’s what he’d meant to ask but he wasn’t just going to come out and say it. How on earth did the angel tune into him like that? Dean refused to be distracted at a time like this so he got dressed by himself in the bathroom, then loaded up the car with all weapons necessary and got in the car with the angel with a one track mind.

Neither of them spoke for the whole drive and Dean somehow lost control of his brain at some point. The more he tried to stop thinking about those striking blue eyes and how they could read him so well the more he actually thought about them. The human psyche was a bitch. He attempted to push his thoughts aside as they pulled up in front of the abandoned warehouse. Crowley had given them very specific directions for this case. They were to kill all of the vampires, save the humans, and grab a silver briefcase. Dean knew better than to question his boss and Castiel must’ve known too because they both had never asked about what exactly the briefcase was for. There were more pressing matters, like saving the humans from either being turned or killed for food.

Dean parked about a quarter mile down the road once he’d had the warehouse in sight. The journal had said that hunting blood suckers in the daylight was a wise choice as they were either sluggish or asleep at that time. With a few syringes in his pocket full of dead man’s blood provided by Crowley and a few guns on his person the two men exited the vehicle and began their walk towards the warehouse. The angel unsheathed a blade Dean didn’t even know he had. It had to be made of some shiny silver metal that probably didn’t exist on earth. It glistened and reflected the sun no matter how he held it. It appeared smoothe all around, it looked harmless if he was being honest, but he suspected it had capabilities beyond his simple understanding. It reminded him of the angel who held it. Just a gorgeous average joe that no one would assume housed a celestial being. Maybe that’s why Castiel chose him, he was powerful and could blend in really well.

Once they made it to the warehouse Dean’s plan was to sneak in the back while Castiel came through the front. Being that he was far more powerful should they come for him he could hold his own while Dean concentrated on the other humans and finding that briefcase. That was the plan after all, though Castiel had showed obvious hesitation on leaving Dean alone. They parted ways going to opposite sides of the abandoned building. Dean advanced towards his designated door keeping his footsteps quiet and gun in hand. He could practically hear his fast paced heart rate as he slowly turned the knob on the worn backdoor to find it open. That could mean two things; the vampires expected company and Crowley set them up, or they were dumber than he thought they were. He hoped with everything in him that it was the later.

Slinking through the doorway his first priority was to find the people. Walking down the halls with peeling paint he look for another door, any door that held people in need of help behind it. Keeping his eyes wide and his hearing sharp he didn’t hear any commotion. That was a blessing and a curse wrapped in one. Either they had the jump on these bloodsuckers and the element of surprise was on their side, or they were being watched. Dean’s paranoia was at an all-time high as he tried the knobs of several doors to find them locked or the rooms empty. It wasn’t until he came to a set of double doors did it subside.

Pushing through the doors slowly, he cringed as they creaked. He saw several cots lying carelessly around the room. Garbage was formed into several piles on the floor, and several sets of wide, terrified eyes peered at him. These were the people. The ones who needed to be saved.

“Who are you?” one of the women asked as she wrapped a protective arm around the little girl that sat next to her.

“I’m here to help you guys out. Human just like you. I need you guys to do me a solid and grab all your belongings and follow me out of here. My friend is trying to take out some of that vamps in the other room.

Some of them nodded and others had small smiles on their faces as a single silent tear trickled down their face. Once they’d gathered their things he lead them to through the same hallway he just traveled. It was still so quiet, but he didn’t want to think on that, now was the time to be focused on the task at hand. The door to the outside was there. Right freaking there.

That’s when the noise began.

Dean lunged towards the exit, putting his whole body into shoving the door open. The women began running, one by one escaping to freedom as Dean heard the growling and thumping feet of the vampires behind him. As the last girl made it out he put his body in front of the door and finally faced the vicious creatures. They appeared to be regular people except for the nasty extra row of teeth, long and pointy, positioned in front of their regular teeth.

He heard a door slam open several yards ahead of them. He hoped it was the angel, but he couldn’t take his eyes away from his adversary to check. One of the four was bold enough to come at him, he was fast but Dean was faster. Drawing his cocked and ready gun he shot it right between the eyes. He knew it wasn’t enough the kill the monster but it would hurt him and slow him down. He reached into his coat and pulled out his machete as the second one came at him, throwing his whole torso into the effort as the blade made contact with its neck and his head slid clean off. The 3rd and 4th turned to flee but where met with none other than the angel. He placed his hands on their foreheads and killed them with merely his touch. Their screams alone made Dean cringe, but he was captivated by how Castiel’s eyes glowed like 100watt lightbulbs as he ended them. The lifeless bodies fell to the ground and he saw their eyes were burned out of their heads. It was gruesome to say the least.

 A door behind the angel flew open and a girl came running out. 3 more of those creatures trailing close behind her. Dean’s first thought and instinct was to go to her. To help her. To save her. That’s why he’d completely forgotten the vampire he’d shot but didn’t kill. He was met with a bloodied face and baring teeth. Hands reach out and grabbed him by his jacket collar before lifting him and tossing him like a feather. He hit the wall with such force his whole body went numb and he could’ve sworn he heard something crack. He slid to the floor limp and in pain, barely had enough in him to keep his eyes open.

 _Gotta help Cas_ , was his last thought before he slipped into the darkness.


	7. This Feels like a Good Idea

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Allo! This is yet another on time addotion! I'm feeling pretty proud of myself for adhering to this schedule thing. There's actually no real warnings for this chapter. Just some build up to bigger and better (sadder) things. I hope you enjoy this one. As usual comments and kudos are welcome! Happy reading! xoxo

Life for Dean Winchester was exhausting. His bleary eyes felt heavy as he tried to open them. His efforts did him no good since as soon as he opened them his head started pounding. He found himself lying in the dark, on his back, on the comfortable motel bed. The last thing he recalled was getting flung like a ragdoll while trying to help the last hostage of those nasty vampires. He’d hoped she got away. He hoped the angel saved her and wiped those disgusting creatures from the face of this planet.

“Dean.” That stormy, familiar voice rang through the room as he tried to sit up in hopes of going to relieve his bladder.

“Yeah Cas.” He doesn’t know what sparked the conception of the nickname but it felt good on his tongue. He looked to his left to see the angel’s face illuminated by only the trickle of moonlight that slipped in through the curtain. He looked ethereal, even more than usual.

“How are you feeling?”

“I’ve got a headache, but I’m surprisingly alright.”

“Yes that’s a side effect of me healing you.”

“You—healed me? What happened?”

“When the vampire threw you he did it with a considerable amount of force. He cracked your skull, but I healed you.” He paused before sighing and continued, “I do apologize I touched you without your consent, but you weren’t coherent enough to give me permission so I did what I thought was best.”

“Consent?” Dean laughed despite his brain thumping inside his head. “If I’m beat up so bad I can’t answer you, you have full unlimited consent to help me out.”

“I’ll remember that.”

Silence hung in the air like a cloth thrown over old furniture, it was thick and heavy, but not daunting. Dean had to consciously avert his gaze from the angel’s steely one. That’s when he remembered he’d had to go to the bathroom and quickly made his exit. He took his time and in that time he’d taken a shower, washing off all the funk and blood that seemed to be everywhere. He needed this day to be over and tomorrow could began, so his head wouldn’t feel so heavy and his thoughts wouldn’t be so clouded. He thought about all those women, taken away from their homes, jobs, families. Someone out there was missing a mother, a daughter, a wife, a friend. He hoped with everything in him that they all found their way back to where they belonged.

Once he deemed himself clean enough he got out and dried off, slinging on a pair of sweatpants and an old t-shirt too ratty for public wear. Finally leaving the bathroom he found the angel in the same spot, not that he’d expected him to be any other way.

“She got out like the rest of them.” He said as if he read Dean’s mind. Now that he thought about it the angel probably could read his mind. Probably had x-ray vision and a whole arsenal of other abilities Dean didn’t know about.

“That’s good. I’m glad.” Dean didn’t say much else due to him wanting to put this whole fiasco behind him. Cas resorted to taking out his phone and texting this friend he’d told Dean nothing about. All he knew was that it was a woman, a human woman.

You: He’s resorted to shortening my name now. Do you think that’s a good thing?

Charlie: He’s given you a nickname I’m assuming. That’s a good and friendly sign! J

Castiel looked up from his phone to glance at Dean. He often found himself looking at the man often when he was in his presence, even when he wasn’t aware he was being looked at. Something about the man struck something in Castiel. He wasn’t sure what either of those things might be and he didn’t have a clue where to start identifying them. One thing he knew for sure was that his desire to protect this man went far beyond his mission. It was personal, a desire of his own. Angels weren’t supposed to have desires, it wasn’t forbidden per say just heavily frowned upon. Emotions, like desire, led to Falling. Angels were meant to be beings who were led, not ones who felt. Castiel couldn’t help his new bundles of desires, he also didn’t understand why they were seen as negative. Everything he felt was positive, though most of them revolved around Dean, they also had to do with his brother and Charlie. He liked these humans, they’d shown him an abundance of kindness since he’d arrived on Earth. As he did throughout his existence, as well as now, he failed to understand his brothers loathing of humankind.

*                             *                             *                             *

Dean woke up feeling pretty friggin rested. Maybe something about rooming with a celestial being had a positive effect on his sleeping patterns, whatever it was he felt damn good right now. He smiled at the angel before taking some clothes from his bag and changing in the bathroom. He was famished to say the least and needed to get to a diner as quick as possible.

“So hey I know you don’t need to eat or sleep but have you tried coffee yet?” Dean’s voice tossed him out of his musings. The man was trying to start a conversation with him, and he needed to respond.

“No I have not.”

“Ok then let’s go for it cause I’m in need of a boost.”

They drove in silence until Dean pulled into the parking lot of a diner. Castiel recognized the area letting him know they were close to the man’s apartment. He got out of the car with Dean and followed the man into the establishment. They were seated in a booth towards the back by a woman who spoke to Dean with such familiarity he couldn’t help but assume they were friends, or at the very least knew each other. They traded words and laughter and Castiel couldn’t help but want to be able to communicate with Dean in such an easy manner.

“So Cas, these are the different types of coffee they have.” Dean spoke as he flipped open the cover to the menu that had been placed in front of him and pointed to the beverage section. “It tells you what’s in it under each name. You probably have no clue what these are but just pick one. Do you like sweet or bitter things?”

Castiel had to think on that one. Everything just tasted like molecules to him and he had yet to find out something he’d enjoyed. His thoughts led him to think of Gabriel. The archangel was obsessed with all things sweet and sugary. He’d babble on for hours about all the candies and treats he’d tasted on his often visits to earth. Castiel would take that route in hopes that he’d find something he’d like.

“I’m not sure, but I’ll go with sweet.”

“Awesome. We’ll order you this sugary latte thing.”

The waitress who seated them returned shortly after Dean had figured out what he wanted to eat. He recited their order to her and she wrote it down before bouncing off to wherever she’d come from.

You: how do I make communication easier with him? I often find myself not knowing what to say.

Charlie: Small talk is horrible I know. Try asking him what he likes, hobbies, favorite foods, things like that.

Castiel decided to take Charlie’s advice and talk to Dean about his favorite things. He waited until the waitress showed up with their order before starting his inquiry. He didn’t want any interruptions should they discourage Dean from sharing.

“Dean what is your favorite food?”

“That’s hella random buddy, but I’d have to say pie and burgers.”

“Aren’t pies considered to be a dessert?”

“Don’t argue what’s real food when you don’t even eat.” He lifted his fork and pointed it at Castiel. “Pie is a food and a dessert. It gets two categories cause it’s that good.”

“I’ve never had pie.” He lifted his mug and gingerly took a sip of his drink. He let the warm substance sit in his mouth for a while before swallowing it to accurately gauge the taste. He found he enjoyed the sugary drink. It still tasted reminiscently like molecules but they were sugary and bitter all at the same time. It was good in comparison to other things he’d tried.

“Do you like it?” Dean tipped his head motioning to the mug in Castiel’s hand.

“Yes. It is quite good.”

“Well look at that.” He smiled. “The angel likes lattes.”

Castiel felt a tug at his lips due to Dean’s approval. He smiled for real for the first time ever.

*                             *                             *                             *

Dean pulled the car into his usual parking spot outside the building. He turned off the roaring engine and turned to the angel sitting by his side.

“Ok so I’m gonna go inside. Lay on the fake tale to Sammy. You gotta stay out here for a hour or so then you can come back with your own bag and keys. No teleporting, just come in the front door the old fashioned way.”

“I know this Dean. We’ve talked about this already.”

“Alright Sassy pants I’m just making sure you remembered the plan.”

“I’m capable of remembering many things.”

Dean didn’t bother dignifying that with an answer and got out of the car without another word. He threw the bags containing his weapons and other hunting gear in the trunk, taking the bag with his clothes inside with him. He was met with a cocktail of assaulting smells as soon as he opened the door. The fact that today was such an important day had slipped Dean’s mind completely until the foul scents of organic hair products and body wash jogged his memory.

Today was Sam’s prom.

Passing by the bathroom door Dean was now in a rush to figure out where the hell the only suit he owned was. He tossed his bag to the side and practically dove into his closet. Several shoe boxes were tucked in a corner on the top shelf. Dean cast a mischievous glance at them knowing that only one of them contained actual shoes and the rest was his physical porn stash he had kept from his youth. He grabbed the tattered white box and tossed it behind him onto the bed. At least he knew where his shoes where. He heard the shower turn off and it was only a matter of minutes before Sam would come bursting into his room and immediately noticing that Dean forgot about today. But Dean wouldn’t let that happen. He dug in the furthest left corner of his closet and found the suit hanging in a zippered bag where he had left it since his father’s funeral.

He remembered that day like it was yesterday. The Winchester boys all dressed up with nowhere happy to go. Dean was drunk that whole day, probably the entire week, but he covered up his stench with too much cologne and a sea of aftershave. His brother and Bobby had known all too well what Dean had done. Hell Sam had been around for half of Dean’s drunken time. He was a wreck, broken and lost, all mixed up inside. Not once did he cry. Not when his father died in front of him, not when they whisked off the body, and not when they lowered the black wooden casket in the ground. Not a single tear fell until the first anniversary, when Dean had enough liquid courage to actually go through the small amount of belongings his father had left behind.

 Stowing away the memories, he pulled it out of the bag and shook out each piece hoping that it hadn’t collected much dust over the time it hadn’t seen the light of day. When he and Sam went on that painful shopping trip he’d regretfully volunteered to be their driver for the night. Dean couldn’t afford to rent them a limo and what classier way to show up than in his Baby? She was a gorgeous piece of Dean’s hardest efforts and he wanted his little brother to ride in true style for his special night.

Dean pulled on his shirt and pants before Sam busted in his door. He was just about to button up the shirt when the whirlwind boy blew in looking for any sign that Dean had forgotten such an important night. He shot his brother a smirk that spoke volumes of ‘shows you know nothing Sam’.

“Dean—you’re—“

“Almost ready? Yes I am. You aren’t though. Better hurry. You don’t wanna keep Jess waiting.” He tried his best not to laugh at his brother who stood there damp in nothing but a towel wrapped around his waist.

“I thought you forgot.” He sighed.

“I’m hurt Sam.” He placed a hand over his midsection and curled over like he’d been actually hurt. “Oh ye of little faith brother.”

“Well it’s not like you’ve never forgotten things before.”

“Yeah well nothing big like this.”

“When you’re done do you think you could…help me tie my tie? I haven’t done it in so long I forgot.”

“Yeah I got you Sammy.”

His brother turned with a beaming smile on his face and shut the door behind him.

“I always got you.”

*                             *                             *                             *

Castiel took his time alone to visit the library again and read a book Charlie had suggested on body language. He texted her with the questions he had and read the entire thing in the hour Dean thought was suffice to keep his brother without suspicions. It was a good thing he did read it because the moment he walked into the apartment he found Dean sitting on the couch in the living room with a soda in his hand practically vibrating with nervousness. He greeted him and received a grunt in response to once he’d sat his bag in his bedroom he walked immediately out and sat next to Dean on the couch intending to find out what was wrong.

“Are you alright Dean?”

“Tonight is Sam’s prom and I don’t want to fuck it up.”

“Aren’t you just driving them to the event? How could you possibly…fuck it up?”

His questions were met with a set of wide eyes from Dean. He bent forward to sit his soda can on the coffee table where his feet were propped up on. He sat back and leveled Castiel with a look he could only assume was surprise, he’d never seen such an expression on the human and he wondered what other expressions he could pull from the man.

“An angel of the Lord using profanity? Isn’t that like…forbidden?” Dean laughed.

Castiel had to think on that for a moment before replying. Of all the rules, regulations, and procedures that were instilled in him throughout his existence he couldn’t recall anything along the lines of prohibiting him from using profanity. Sure using it was considered beneath him, but it was never outright said to be wrong.

“No I don’t think so.”

He wanted to know Dean, inside and out he wanted to know everything that encompassed the human’s being, yet another desire he found within himself. He still wasn’t sure why such a desire had the strength that it had and what spawned it in the first place, but it was there.  He knew what his desire was, that was the most important to him, he felt it was taking root within him so much that he had a name for it. Granted Charlie and the books he’d read helped him with that name, but he now knew what it was. He didn’t feel like he was Falling though, it didn’t make him feel any less like he had for the last several millennia, and he suspected it wouldn’t any time in the near future. Charlie had said that Dean would learn to trust him if he felt comfortable around him, speaking like him seemed like a good start. He wouldn’t use profanity for profanity’s sake, but it was an addition to his vocabulary he’d reach for every now and again.

“How do I look guys?” Sam stood with outstretched arms at the entrance of the living room. He was dressed in a dark gray suite with an olive green shirt and a gray tie to match his suite.

“Looking sharp little brother.” Dean stood from the couch with a smile on his face.

“You look very nice Sam.” Castiel tried offering a compliment as the book had said positive comments make you nice to be around. That earned him a glowing smile from the young man and it warmed Castiel to see that he caused it to happen. Dean also smiled at his words, appreciating the kindness he showed to his brother.

“Thanks Castiel.” his gaze flicked to his brother. “Jess just texted me and told me she’s ready so we should probably head out.

“Let me go grab my camera.” Dean smiled before running off in the direction of his bedroom.

“Dean.” Sam whined. “I didn’t even know you owned a camera dude.”

“Shows how much you know about me Sammy.” He came back with a small camera in his hand. “I’ll be back Cas.” He winked before they left out of the door leaving Castiel to his happy thoughts.

*                             *                             *                             *

Taking Sam to Jess’ place had been way more entertaining than he had hoped. Come to find out he’d met both of her parents before, doing work on their cars at Bobby’s shop. They felt much more comfortable leaving their daughters in the hands of the brother’s due to the familiarity. Dean could show he was responsible when he needed to be. Sure he didn’t always make the greatest decisions, but they were always laced with good intentions. With her parents and him combined they probably took about a hundred pictures of the young couple, much to the teen’s annoyance. A lot of laughter was exchanged before Sam and Jess teamed up, her pushing her parents back into the house and Sam pushing Dean towards the car. Dean wouldn’t be a very good big brother if he didn’t embarrass Sam at least 75% of the time.

He drove them to the school where the prom was held thanks to the giant gymnasium they built not too long after Dean himself had dropped out. Sam said they were going out with some friends afterwards, and Dean had given him a shortened version of ‘The Talk’ along with a couple of condoms for good measure. Sam may have rolled his eyes and grumbled about it, but he took them nonetheless.

Now Dean was on his way back home to his angel infested household. The thought made him chuckle. It wasn’t that he was excited to spend some time with the angel, but he was a pleasant guest and he was happy he wouldn’t have to mope in his lonesome.

He arrived to find Cas in the same spot he’d left him in with his eyes squinting at the tv and his head cocked in confusion. Dean had his eyes so trained on the angel that he didn’t take notice to what he was actually watching.

“If the pizza man truly loves this babysitter, why does he keep slapping her rear?” his words made Dean pause for a moment with an expression of his own confusion. “Perhaps she’s done something wrong?

“Cas—“he finally looked at the TV. “Are you watching porn?!” he wants to shield the angel from watching further as if he’s now protector of angel innocence, but he also wants to know how on earth this happened. After a beat of silence and no response from the angel he goes with option two. “Why and how are you watching porn? Did you buy this?”

“I did not purchase anything. I used this—bar with buttons to change what I was watching and this appeared.”

“First of all that’s called a remote. Secondly the name of what you’re watching pops up when you switch channels. This is called Pepperoni Pussy. That means porn Cas.”

“So if the program refers to genitalia then it is pornography?”

“You know what a pussy is, but not a remote?” Dean sighs and takes his leave for the kitchen. He reaches in the refrigerator for a beer and returns to Cas looking confused at his lap. “Great now he’s got a boner.” He mutters. “I’m gonna take it down for the night. Please make sure to turn off your porn when Sam comes home.”

All he gets is a grunt in response.

*                             *                             *                             * 

_Dean was covered in so much blood he just knew it had to be soaking into his skin at some point. He tried everything he could think of to avoid this happening. Everything he had learned did nothing for him. They were just too strong and he was powerless to stop them. So much death. So many people gone. The moon hung over head, not as bright as it should be. It hid behind the clouds no doubt hiding itself from Dean’s shame. The wind blew around him, the blood drying and caking on his skin. Whispers of the wind tell him he should’ve been stronger. Dead leaves crunching beneath his feet telling him he should’ve been faster. A wolf howling in the distance telling him it was useless. His heart ached and his limbs were heavy, but he couldn’t find it in him to give up just yet. He’d fight until his death. It seemed to be coming sooner than later and a dark piece of him wished for it. He deserved it after all._

Dean shot up in bed, his eyes taking a while to come into focus, and that alone sent him into a panic. Slowly he realized he was in his room and it had all been a dream. A terrible dream though nothing was real. His chest heaved with heavy breathes as he found he couldn’t get enough air. He felt himself tremble as if the air was cold, but it was actually quite warm in his room. He needed to breathe. He needed a drink. What he didn’t think he needed prior to it happening was Castiel busting in his door like he was saving Dean from a fire. His eyes flickered over the room and he checked the wardings by the window and under the rug before he sat on the edge of the bed by Dean’s legs. He was so close, so damn close Dean could smell him. He smelled like a winter’s rain. The kind of rain that happens after a night of snow and the sun comes to shed some warmth but the sky isn’t done pouring yet.

He looked at Dean’s face with his laser gaze. Like he was visually taking his vitals or something. The way that his eyes flickered over Dean’s face and torso he wouldn’t put it past the angel to have that ability and to use it when needed.

“Are you alright?” That stormy voice was like a cool silk sheet being tossed over Dean in the gentlest of ways.

“I’m ok—just a nightmare.”

Castiel simply nodded before he lunged forward wrapping both of his arms around Dean. That trench coat didn’t do his body justice. His arms were strong with the embrace, not tight enough to hurt, but enough that Dean could feel truly held. He was like the cooling balm you put on a burn. The pain is still there, but the throbbing heat of it is washed away as it seeps under your skin. Dean didn’t know how long they stayed wrapped around each other like that, but at some point he’d wrapped his own arms around the angel. At some point it got to be too much, and Dean knew he wasn’t worthy of the affections of this celestial being so he pulled away.

“Thanks Cas.” There goes that nickname again, but it feels so right so he goes with it.

“I read somewhere that hugging is a form of comfort. I felt that you needed it.”

“Yeah man I actually did kind of need that.” Dean chuckled but it lacked the normal warmth of his laugh. “Hey how did you even know something was wrong with me?”

“You yelled out.” The angel reached up a hand to wipe at Dean’s face. He didn’t realize he was crying until the smooth pads of Cas’ lean fingers swiped at his cheek. “You should go back to sleep. I will watch over you.”

Dean couldn’t lie, he found Cas watching him sleep to be a little creepy. He also couldn’t dodge the fact that he was a little relieved at the angel’s presence. It took him awhile after he closed his eyes, but when the sleep came it washed over him deeply. No more dreams came.

Castiel left out that Dean was in fact, yelling his name in his sleep.

_*                             *                             *                             *_

Dean was a little reluctant when he got a couple texts from Crowley, he hadn’t even asked Dean to come to the house, just sent him a couple links and instructions. He wanted to help people, the need to do so was growing the more he found out about the supernatural beings that lurked out in the world. He wasn’t given a case though, Crowley was giving him info on angels and demons that he probably wouldn’t have looked for on his own. Some of it he had known from his talk with Cas, about possession and the fact that demons don’t need permission. What he hadn’t known was the fact that angels and demons had a true form on their planes of existence. Demons of course were ugly twisted beings, their forms hard to comprehend with the human mind. But angels were apparently giants with wings and tails. Dean couldn’t help but wonder what Cas’ wings looked like. They were no doubt beautiful—wow that was surprising line of thought—he wondered if they were white and fluffy, or iridescent like peacocks, or maybe super earthy toned like a hawk.

He tucked his phone away since his break was over and got right back to work, like the good mechanic he was. He felt his phone buzz in his pocket with another text, but he didn’t look at it until he got back home.

*                             *                             *                             *

“Hey Sam you ever thought about getting a tattoo?” Dean stood in the doorway of his brother’s room where he was sitting at his desk hunched over a pile of books and paper.

“They’re cool. Why?”

“Well I was thinking we could get matching tattoos as your graduation present.”

“That’s really random Dean.” He laughed. “What do you wanna get?”

“I was thinking we could get the same one dad had. You know the star with the flames he got over his chest?”

Sure it sounded like Dean just wanted to do something nice with his brother as like a commemorative thing for their dad. Dean was actually reading his Dad’s journal again and found the meaning of that odd little tattoo he had. It was an anti-possession stamp so that no demons could have their way with them. He wanted his brother to be as protected as possible before he left for college. This was part of the preparation that kept his thoughts heavily occupied. His brother nodded and a small, sad smile crept onto his face. Dean returned the gesture and went to call up Charlie to get the number for the local shop that she had gotten some work done.

“Deaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan!!!” she screamed as the call finally connected.

“Hey Charles. How ya been?”

“How have I been!? Where the hell have you been? I feel like I haven’t seen your pretty face in ages.”

“Not sure this face is as pretty as you remember it to be.” He chuckled.

“Striking out with the guys and gals?”

“I haven’t even had time for all that. Been working non-stop, helping Sam with prom and registering for school. Even got a new—roommate that moved in.”

He thanked all the lucky stars in existence that he and Charlie hadn’t gone to high school together. He could keep up the façade that Cas was an old buddy from back in the day. He truly did miss having the fire filled red head around. He needed some wild spunk in his now gray life.

“What I actually called about was to ask you a question.”

“Don’t change topics, we will be talking about this roommate. But go ahead.”

“So I was looking to get me and Sam tattooed soon. A little graduation present for him. Think you can hook us up with your buddy?”

“Dean Winchester. I have wanted to hear those words for a very long time. Of course I can!”

“Well alright then.” He laughed outright. “Set it up and let me know.”

“Will do. Now back to this roommate.”


	8. You Got Me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello Hello! Hope you guys are having a great holiday season! Here's another update! There's quite a bit of violence in this. Not too gory but just thought you should know. Some feels in this one as well. As always thanks for reading. Comments and kudos are welcome. xoxo

Existence for Castiel was peculiar indeed. He’d gotten word from his superiors in Heaven and they gave him permission to continue on these hunts with Dean so long as he kept the human safe at all costs. He was even threatened with consequences should the man die in his charge. He didn’t know why they were so insistent when Castiel would, in fact, do anything in his power to keep him safe. He even thought about trying to persuade the man to give up the hunts all together, questioning why he was following this—creature, the Crowley fellow. It angered him that he couldn’t tell what the being was exactly. He must’ve had some kind of strong cloaking spell around him. With Dean taking orders from the creature he felt it necessary to find out what he was, for Dean’s safety and for his. That was a little lower on his to-do list for right now though, now he was watching Dean and his brother at a tattoo shop. Of course he was invisible, merely an unseen presence in the corner. He didn’t want to bother them by asking to go with them, plus it would probably raise some suspicions from Sam since he was supposed to be at work.

He convinced himself that he was just watching over the brothers, but really he was here to see the two of them in their element, so to speak. Dean seemed to interact with every person differently and he wondered if that was just a Dean thing or were all humans like that. With himself Dean seemed to be friendly enough, but weary in what he said to the angel. It could be a trust thing, and that’s what he chalked it up to be. They hadn’t been in each other’s presence long enough for the human to trust him. He didn’t fault Dean for that, they’d only known each other for such a short time. With Sam he seemed—paternal in the way he treated him. Both of their parents were no longer a part of their lives, even though there was a 4 year difference between them the difference in the dynamic was clear. Sam talked to Dean and showed a type of respect that Castiel would show his superiors, serve with little to no questioning. It wasn’t as rough and absolute as his following was, but the similarities were there.

Dean was getting his tattoo before Sam, probably to show his strength to his brother, to be an example to ease Sam’s nervousness. His face was hardened in an unreadable expression, one that the angel saw often. The tattoo artist placed the stencil on Dean’s pectoral and got his tools ready. Castiel immediately recognized the image as an anti-possession sigil. This was smart of Dean to get both of them protected in light of what was happening. He felt himself smiling at the human’s intelligence, he wouldn’t cease to amaze him.

*                             *                             *                             *

Dean just kept stabbing, anywhere he could reach. He didn’t care about the blood that splattered everywhere. On his face, on the floor, on his clothes, blood everywhere. He was at the end of his rope when he watched a woman who he didn’t even know, get her throat ripped out by the monster. He snapped, didn’t recall crossing the room and tackling the thing to the ground, but now he found himself  slipping his knife into it over and over, the being was unrecognizable now, but did that stop him? Certainly not. He was beyond angry, beyond hurt, this thing would pay for what it did beyond its death if he had any say in that. Since he now sat on its lifeless body, turning it to a bloody mess, he had all the say he wanted. Dammit he would get his say!

This all started when Dean was peacefully applying some Aquaphor on his tattoo, minding his own damn business when he got several texts pinging through from Crowley. He’d had another case for him. He knew he’d be taking the angel with him, Dean wouldn’t have it any other way at this point. The celestial being had come more in handy than Dean could ever ask for. He doubted the angel would even let him go without him. So he’d filled him in on the plan that formulated in his mind. Werewolves where nothing else if not ferocious and annoying. Crowley sent him some tips and tricks on how to take them out. Silver bullets that he’d given him in that heavy case. He was a bit hardened from the first case they’d went on. Determined more than ever to save some lives. He didn’t even mind that there was yet again another item that Crowley wanted them to retrieve while they were on the hunt.

He told Cas about his plan and the angel agreed immediately. He was more than grateful to the angel for coming along with him. Sam had even believed his bullshit lie about spending the weekend with some girl, he didn’t question Castiel’s need to be gone as well. They stayed in yet another hotel. It got a little awkward when they messed up his reservation, discovering there was only one bed. Castiel had said since he didn’t sleep, he would just hangout on the couch for the nights and let Dean have the bed. He couldn’t lie, he wanted to share the space with the stoic angel, but of course he wouldn’t dare voice that desire.

Once they arrived on scene everything was going well at first. They killed a few with no problem, Cas doing his weird smiting thing, and Dean shooting his gun like it was another limb to him, chopping them down with little effort. It was when they got to the last one, the one that decided to have a hostage. Dean tried to reason with it, tried to sweet talk his way into the thing letting her go, but there was no letting go. He watched as a clawed hand reached out, tears falling endlessly from the girl’s eyes up until her throat was torn through, blood gushing from the wound and her eyes rolling back as she choked on the plasma, life leaving her body.

And that’s where Dean found himself for a good minute, ripping into the body like all lives depended on it. The werewolf didn’t have to do that. Didn’t have to hurt that poor girl who just wanted to live her damn life. He suddenly felt a pair of strong hands drag him off the bloody pulp. His eyes finally came into focus and he’d seen the mess he created. He saw the dead body of the girl and he yelled out, trashing at the arms that pulled him away from the scene. He heard gravel filled words in his ear but he couldn’t make out what they were saying, but he could feel himself relaxing at the sounds slightly.

He felt himself being strapped into a car, he hoped it was his car. But who was driving if not him? The last thing he felt was a cool touch to his heated forehead and the little vision that he had faded to black.

*                             *                             *                             *

Life for Dean Winchester was getting increasingly annoying the more that time passed. He woke up his bed, no doubt being put here by Cas. The last thing he recalled was losing his shit when that werewolf killed that girl. He doesn’t remember the drive back, doesn’t remember changing his clothes, doesn’t recall being cleaned up or anything. He looked at the old Zeppelin shirt he was wearing, the fibers so thing from so much use that you could practically see through the thing. The sun was shining in through his window, the angel must’ve drove all night to get them back home.

Slowly he rose from his bed expecting to have the burning headache that he’d had the last time the angel did something to him, but the pain never came. He assumed he must be use to the magic touch now. He slinked over to the bathroom to brush his teeth, and while doing so he wondered at what point had he gotten hurt so bad that the angel needed to heal him. His mind hazy with memories of the day before, he really couldn’t recall anything. Either way he needed to thank the angel for his help. He left the bathroom and found his phone, fully charged on his nightstand. Goodness, for a celestial being who knew next to nothing about human things he certainly thought of everything yesterday. It was nearing noon Saturday, thankfully Dean wouldn’t have to go into work. Which meant trying to forget everything from the day prior was his main goal until he had to face adult life and responsibilities on Monday morning. He received a few texts from Crowley thanking him for delivering the item he asked for, a text from Sam letting him know he was hanging out with Jess for the day.

He left the room in search of the angel and found him quickly, sitting cross legged on his bed with a book in his hands. The angel looked up at him and immediately stashed the book behind him before Dean could read the title.

“Hello Dean.”

“Heya Cas.” He felt the corners of his mouth tugging upwards in a smile at the angel, with his ruffled hair and crooked tie. The sight of him becoming familiar and a source of comfort of Dean.

“How are you feeling?”

“I’m doing alright thanks to you. Did you heal me back there? Cause I don’t remember getting hurt.”

“No you didn’t require healing. You were in such a state of rage that I couldn’t reach you with words to calm you. I made you sleep.”

Dean didn’t know how to feel about that. Cas had the power to just knock him unconscious. His instincts were flashing warning signs and red flags all over his brain, but a part of him, the part that had a soft spot for the angel couldn’t seem to see that as a bad thing. Those ever blue eyes were getting to him. Half of him saying that would bite him in the ass later and the other half had the upmost faith in the being before him. It was unsettling how large that soft spot was getting, but for now he would roll with it in hopes that the trust wasn’t in vain.

“I’m sorry if that was wrong of me to do, but you were so angry, I thought sleep would make you feel better.”

“You don’t gotta apologize man, a bad part of me came out and I just—lost control. You drove the Impala all the way back here?”

“Yes I did.”

“Well normally I wouldn’t let anyone drive my Baby. You better not have put a scratch on her.” He pointed a warning finger at the angel.

His eyebrows raising at Dean’s chastising tone. “I showed the upmost kindness to your vehicle.”

“Either way thanks for yesterday man.” He laughed and left the room.

*                             *                             *                             *

Dean was feeling quite shitty for the remainder of the day. He was snapping at the two people he’d recently spent most of his time around. It was terrible of him to do so, but he had good reason for being upset. He was itching for a drink, looking for a fight, something to take his anger out on. He just kept seeing the face of that girl every time he closed his eyes. A haunting vision that wouldn’t let up. Of course he needed to go out to the seediest bar he knew of. Took him awhile to get to the bad side of town. He knew what he was seeking and refused to take his car with him down his slippery slope. He took the bus, leaving the apartment with not so much as a glance at his brother and the angel watching TV in the living room.  

Now he was sitting here on a barstool, his vision blurry, but not enough that he couldn’t see the worried side glances from the bartender that hadn’t yet cut him off. He wasn’t causing any problems so he must not have seen a reason to tell Dean to hit the pavement. He just sat there, staring at nothing, waiting for the drowning to commence. He was almost there, maybe 3 or four more glasses of whiskey would tip him over the edge. That’s what he craved after all, the void that drinking dragged him into. Where nothing mattered and nothing was remembered. The numbness in his limbs were a clear sign that he was almost there, when that same feeling traveled to his brain he knew he’d reached his goal.

He was losing time now. Opening his heavy eyelids finding himself in an alley with the slight cold of the night whipping around him. He was burning up at this point, probably sweating the brown liquid he’d ingested.

The next time he came to he was being pushed up against the wall and a guy was in his face, holding him up by the collar of his jacket. He was coherent enough to see the man’s eyes were blacked out. What a weird guy, he thought before a hand connected to his face. The pain rang through him, not as loud as it would be if he was sober, but he didn’t have it in him to fight back. Why should he be able to get out of this when that girl didn’t have the chance to get away? And there he was thinking about the very thing he was out here running from. He didn’t want to recall any of the previous day.

“You’ll do well to listen to me Dean Winchester. Back the hell off!” the man with the black eyes hollered. “Things are going well without your interference.”

The words barely registered with Dean. How the hell did this guy know his name? He wondered if maybe Cas could wipe his memory since he could make him fall asleep. What other mind scrambling things could the angel do to him? Another blow landed on his stomach, causing him to vomit all of its contents over the man, he yelled out in disgust. Dean was sad he wasted all that money only for it to be tossed back out of his mouth in the worst way, but it was kind of funny how upset it made the man who hit him. He almost laughed when the man suddenly cried out in pain. His face lit up as someone else stepped in. The man’s body crumpled to the ground, his eye sockets blackened and empty, his mouth hanging open. No doubt it was the angel.

Dean was up against the wall again. What was it with people shoving him roughly against walls lately? He’d never been so roughhoused before in his life. The angel was close, so close Dean’s eyes couldn’t focus on any one part of him.

“What is wrong with you?!” the angel reamed into him. “Do you wish to die?!”

Dean couldn’t answer him. Not because he didn’t want to. Not because of his drunken state. Because he really didn’t know the answer to that question. He heard a flap of wings and they were now in his bedroom. He was even gladder now that he didn’t take his car.

“Cas…”

“No!” he lowered his voice, but it still had the same intensity that it had before. Racking Dean to his core no less. “You don’t get to talk now! You will simply listen. I am here to protect you, to keep you from dying for whatever reason that may be. I cannot do that if you simply keep seeking out death.” He took a breath before continuing. “That _thing_ that attacked you was a demon. Take note of its black eyes. Even sober you’d stand little chance alone with one of those. I cannot tell you how to live your life, but I strongly advise you not to do something so blatantly stupid ever again.”

“I couldn’t save her Cas.” He could feel tears stinging at the corners of his eyes, the alcohol bringing out his true emotions. He refused to let them fall.

“What?” the angel’s head cocked to the side with his usual confused expression.

“She died and there was nothing I could do. I should’ve been faster.”

The angel’s faced changed instantly to one of understanding, finally getting what all of this was about.

“I too was saddened by the loss of that girl’s life. But that doesn’t excuse your behavior Dean. If you wish to continue to go on these hunts then keep that in mind. There will be people we will save and those we simply cannot.” He took a few steps towards Dean until he was a breath away. “Your father knew that, all the other hunters of the world know that, yet they still keep fighting. Why? Because there again, will be those they do save.”

*                             *                             *                             *

After making sure Dean was resting peacefully in his bed Castiel had double checked the warding throughout the apartment as he had done every night after the humans went to sleep. Once he deemed everything remained as he wanted he went off to his room to finish his books.

Some time went by and he was almost done when his phone buzzed next to him. He was receiving a call from Charlie. She had said that she was more of a text sender than a caller, only calling for emergency purposes. Knowing this Castiel didn’t hesitate to answer the call.

“Charlie hello.”

“Hey Castiel. Not sure why you’re the first person I’m calling but it just feels right. I think I need some help.”

Her voice sounded strained—like she was in pain. He was alarmed to say the least.

“Where are you?” the only important question right now. The others could be answered after he had ensured his friend’s safety.

“I’ll send you my location. Just please…hurry.”

The call ended and Castiel got a text right after. He could drive, but that would take too long. What if she needed medical assistance and taking her to a hospital would take too long as well? What if she was fatally wounded? He didn’t want to chance the life of the one friend he’d made outside of his mission. He looked at the little map in the text message and closed his eyes before he flew right out of the apartment to where he was needed.

“Castiel!” Charlie tried her best to smile cheerfully, but pain dampened her features drastically.

He had found her in some long abandoned cabin in the middle of the woods. She was laid out on a dusty couch with her jacket pressed up against her leg. Her skin lacked color, she must’ve been bleeding profusely. He immediately went to her and went to his knees on the floor next to the couch.

“This may startle you, I will explain after, and it may give you a headache.”

He touched two fingers to her forehead before she could open her mouth to reply. Feeling his grace brightening within him and sending energy into her. He could feel that her leg was torn open, a major artery gushing blood making her weak. His divine energy mended the wound, rapidly creating new skin cells, and replacing the blood that she’d lost. He noticed her color returning to her skin. When he was finished he drew back, sitting back on his heels and waited for the questions to begin pouring out. He also expected the fear to come out, he was not normal to her.

“Did you just—“she trailed off taking the bloodied jacket off of her thigh revealing it good as new.

She threw the ruined garment on the floor and lunged at Castiel with such force it knocked him flat on his back and her body laid atop of him. He thought it to be an attack until the arms wrapped tightly around his shoulders registered that she was actually hugging him.

“Um Charlie.”

“You healed me!” she shrieked. She pulled back enough that Castiel could see her whole face and fixed him with the brightest smile he’d ever seen. “I can’t believe this! What the hell are you?”

“You aren’t—afraid of me?”

“Afraid?! Why on Earth would I be scared of you!? You just saved my life!” she finally crawled off of him and sat in front of him with her legs crossed and her hands in her lap. “So what are you?”

“I am an Angel of the Lord.”

“That’s friggin’ cool! So you can just touch people and heal them?”

“It’s a little more complicated than that, but essentially yes.”

“Wait how did you get here so fast?”

“I flew.”

“You have wings too?!” she threw her hands up. “I’m best buds with an angel!”

“Best…buds?”

“Yes! We have to be best friends now! You’re officially the coolest person I know!”

“Well I’m glad you’re taking this so well. But I would appreciate it if you didn’t spread my existence around.”

“Of course of course. Your secret is safe with me.” she grinned again. “But what are you doing down here with us lowly humans anyway?”

“I do not view you as lowly in the slightest. I was sent here on a mission to protect someone. The man I’ve been telling you about.”

“Yeah definitely my coolest friend!” she hugged Castiel once again.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey Hey! Happy Holiday! Merry Christmas! Happy New Year! All of that! Sorry for posting later than usual, the holidays were a whirlwind for me. And tomorrow (new years eve) is in fact my birthday! So my gift to myself is finally posting the next chapter. There's a bit of violence in this one so be aware. it's towards the end of the chapter. As always thanks for reading! Comments and kudos welcomed! Have a great day! xoxo

Dean needed some human to human contact and Sam was nowhere to be found, probably out with Jess on a lazy Sunday afternoon. He wasn’t jealous or anything, not really, he’d just been around too many Supernatural creatures for his liking. Cas of course wasn’t included in that list. Though he was probably older than Dean could even fathom he didn’t seem as much. With his lack of pop culture, and even basic human knowledge, he was more like a baby in a trench coat then some all-knowing ancient being. This of course were his thoughts outside of the battle field, whenever they went on that hunt it was like Cas was something totally different. A force to be reckoned with.

Thinking of all the possible humans that were close enough to him to want to spend time with he immediately thought of Charlie and when he woke up that morning he invited her other for some game time. He missed his friend, and if her screaming told him anything she missed him too. Now he was cleaning up the living room, trying to make the place look presentable. He hid all his alcohol so Charlie wouldn’t yell at him for all that he drank. He even took the time to go to the grocery store and bought a bunch of stuff so they’d have homemade pizza for the day. He was exited for something for a change, time escaped him while he worked and next thing he knew she was knocking on the door.

“Charles!” he smiled and immediately embraced the small redhead in a hug.

“Let me see your ink!” she said as she dropped her jacket and bag on the couch. She kicked off her shoes and got comfy real quick.

Dean shook his head at her actions. Charlie was a fireball of positive energy, making any and every one love her if they were around her long enough. He pulled down the loose collar of his worn out t-shirt and showed her the tattoo on his chest. She smiled once she saw it and gave him a high five.

“Now Dean you know I love you. I’m here to have fun with you, but I’m also here to get the scoop on this roommate you refuse to tell me anything about.”

“What’s there to say really? You want a beer?” Dean tried in vain to deflect her original question.

“Yes, but don’t change the subject.” At least he could say he tried.

Coming back with two freshly uncapped bottles of cold beer he settled on the couch next to her. He kicked up his feet on the coffee table as he handed her, her beer and took a swig in hopes that it would help make this conversation a little easier. He’d told her the same fabricated story that he fed to Sam only adding the details about how attracted to the angel he was.

“Dean I have to say that smitten is a good look for you.” She smiled once he’d finished.

“I don’t have a clue what you’re talking about.”

“Look at you! Your skin is glowing, there’s no bags under your eyes. You are radiant.”

“I’ve got a crush on a guy I’ve practically just met. I’m not pregnant.” He knew he did look a little less dead than he usually looked. Castiel probably did a little more than heal him of the injuries he’d gotten the night they met. He felt more rested than he had in at least the last 5 years.

“Same thing.” She brushed him off. “When am I gonna meet this dreamy guy?”

“He’s off living his life. If he comes home tonight then you’ll meet him I guess.”

 Dean didn’t want to give more life to this crush than it needed by hoping in vain. Which meant that he couldn’t be excited about his best friend, hell his only friend, getting to meet the angel. Cas had told him that he had some business to take care of in heaven today so he wouldn’t be around much. After what happened last night he was glad that the angel wouldn’t be around. He was ashamed of how he acted last night. Sure he still wanted to forget and it all hurt, but Cas had been right. If he wanted to keep up this hunting thing then he needed to have tougher skin for this. It wouldn’t benefit anyone if he had a breakdown every time there was someone he couldn’t save.

With the conversation about the angel finally over they began their day at last. Dean put on the first Lord of the Rings movie and they watched while they ate the pizza he’d made. He’s seen the movie at least a dozen times but it really never got old to him. Once they finished that they started playing Smash Brothers. Charlie was kicking his ass. There was yelling, laughing, Dean even threw his controller in anger a couple times. It was all in good fun though, and Charlie always gave him the challenge he needed to keep playing. This was the most fun he’d had in at least a month. Of course it all came crashing down when he heard the sound of the door being unlocked.

In walks Castiel in all his graceful glory. He didn’t look to happy either. That was, until he looked at Dean and Charlie sitting on the couch controllers in hand about to start a new match. His ever blue eyes widened in surprise, an expression Dean had never seen on him, his face then breaking into a smile.

“Hello Charlie, Dean.” 

Charlie then turned to Dean wide a set of wide eyes of her own. “This is your new roommate?!” she laughed.

“Am I the only one who’s lost here?” he asked trying to piece together what exactly was happening in front of him.

“Wow Castiel. This is the second best thing to have happened to me all week.” She bounced off the couch giving the angel a quick hug.

Dean’s eyes flickered back and forth between them still lost in his confusion. Luckily Charlie decided to have some pity on him and explain the phenomenon he was now a part of.

“When Castiel fell to Earth I found him walking on the side of the road and decided to give him a ride out here. Since then we’ve been best buds.”

“So Charlie is that girl you’ve been texting constantly?” he asked turning his attention to Cas. “And fell? So you know what he is?”

“I had to heal her last night.” Castiel finally spoke up. “She was attacked by a demon and requested my help.”

“Did you know what he was before that?”

“No I really just wanted a ride to the hospital.”

“And you didn’t think to call me? What the fuck is going on here?” Dean ran his hands through his hair, a nervous habit that flared when he was trying to wrap his brain around something. He found himself doing that a lot lately.

“I know I know, but C comes before D in the alphabet and I was panicking.”

“Either way I’m just glad you’re ok.” He sighed. “Alright so you know what angels and demons are and you’ve met both. Doesn’t that freak you out a bit? Cause it seems like I’m the only one freaking out right now.” Dean drained the rest of his beer and decided the time for another one was right friggin’ now. He walked past the two of them and made a beeline for the fridge.

“Of course this all weird and knew to me Dean, but I’m not afraid of Castiel. He saved my life.”

“Yeah he has a habit of doing that.” He tossed a small smile at the angel.

“You’re my friends, both of you. I do not wish to see you perish.”

“See Dean? How could I be afraid of someone who doesn’t wish to see me perish?”

“Alright, alright. You guys are friends now and I’ll accept that.” He took his former seat on the couch. “But my rule still stands. Sam hears none of this. He’s been in the dark about this for his whole life, and things will stay that way as long as I have say in that.”

The two of them nodded their understanding. From there the night molds to its former light hearted mood, the only difference is now the angel is included. He tried really hard not to think about the warmth that settled within him at Cas calling him his friend. Sure it was his job to make sure Dean didn’t die, but he was glad that the angel enjoyed it enough to want to be more than a bodyguard to him.

Charlie took the time to teach the angel how to play the game and at first he’s absolutely horrid, but that changes faster than Dean had expected it to  and soon enough he’s kicked both of their asses. At some point Charlie went to get more beer and comes back with 3 bottles. Cas drank it without a complaint, not even a grimace at the taste. Dean smiles at the angel, making sure no one sees him. That’s my angel, he thinks.

*                             *                             *                             *

Dean woke up in the middle of the night to the sound of screams. They didn’t belong to him, that’s the first thing he’d realized. The second thing was that they’d come from his brothers room. He shot out of bed like he was on fire and ran out into the hall to see Cas headed in the same direction. They busted through Sam’s door to find him thrashing on the bed. He wasn’t physically hurt and there was nothing visible in his room. His brother laid there drenched in sweat with his eyes closed, his mouth hanging open. He looked like he was in pain. Dean wanted nothing more in than moment to take on whatever his brother was experiencing right now.

He moved forward to wake him only to feel his arm taken in a tight grip. Cas was holding him back and he’d be damned if anything held him back from helping Sam.

“Let me soothe him before we wake him up.”

He wanted to ask questions, he could feel the need to and the doubt itching under his skin. They didn’t have time for that right now and up until this point Cas had given him no real reason to doubt him. This was his brother though so a lot of rules and feelings were cut short. He nodded at the angel and watched closely as he touched the two fingers to Sam’s head, his thrashing stopping almost immediately.

“I’m simply feeding him peaceful thoughts, I assume being on a sandy beach is much more pleasant than whatever he’s experiencing right now.” He said removing his hand once Sam had settled. “He should sleep peacefully for the rest of the night. I can’t see directly what he’s seeing because he hasn’t given me permission to do so.”

“You can’t or you won’t?” Dean just had to ask. He wanted to know the extent of Cas’ mind melting powers.

“I don’t want to invade his privacy.”

Dean let go a sigh of relief before giving his brother another glance. He did look mighty peaceful, his chest simply rising and falling in his slumber. Dean clapped the angel on the shoulder before turning to leave the room and seeking his own peaceful sleep.

*                             *                             *                             *

Life for Dean Winchester wasn’t too bad for once. He woke up feeling pretty damned good for a Monday morning. Sam was up as well looking like his normal cheery self. That was until he sat Dean down at the kitchen table to tell him what he saw last night. They were eating breakfast in comfortable silence like they normally did when Sam wasn’t rushing off to the library before school and Dean didn’t have to go to work until 10.

“So I had the weirdest dream last night.”

“Oh yeah what happened?” Dean feigned ignorance pretty well, talking around a mouthful of eggs.

“There was some dude with yellow eyes in here and he tried to kill Castiel. It was really—realistic. He was torturing him and everything. It kind of upset me.”

Dean was out of his depths here. Sam obviously wanted to talk about how it made him feel. Dean wasn’t one for emotional conversation, but he also wasn’t big enough of a dick to deny his brother the chance to get his thoughts out in the open. If Sam needed to talk to get through this then he would listen.

“Are you gonna tell Cas?”

“I wasn’t planning on it. I mean he seems like a cool enough person, but I don’t really know him all that well to just come out saying ‘hey I had a dream you were tortured to death in Dean’s room’.”

“Yeah I get what you’re saying.” He sipped from his coffee mug. “I can kind of imagine his face if you told him something like that.” He felt a sudden laugh bubble out of him.

“Dean I’m being serious here.” He rolled his eyes. “It was just a dream, but it felt so real to me. The guy even said ‘I’m doing this for you Sam’. It was creepy as hell.”

That was pretty creepy, Sam was right about that. Dean made a mental note to definitely ask Cas about that later. With all the random supernatural shit that was popping off lately he couldn’t let anything slide by as mere coincidence. Charlie was involved in this crap and that was bad enough, but his brother? That was the end of the line that Dean was trying to avoid with everything in him. He had no doubts that his Dad died with the wish that his sons were none the wiser about all this.

“That is pretty wild Sam, but don’t lose your head over it. Just a weird dream.”

“It was, after all that I ended up walking on a beach with Jess and I don’t remember anything after that.”

So Cas’ weird Jedi mind trick had worked. Dean was glad for that, he knew there was importance in the little things. Who knows what Hell Sam would’ve seen had the dream continued on the dark route it was on. The rest of the morning went by as normal as it could’ve in the Winchester household. Sam finished getting ready for school, waving at Dean with a smiling face and went to catch the bus. Dean did his own thing before he left the house, he checked in Cas’ room to find the angel not there and he went to work with a heavier step than what’d he woken up with.

The day didn’t get any easier after that. Dean ended up soaked in car oil due to some faulty tubes, the discussion he had with Sam weighing more and more on his mind as the time rolled by. He was distracted, Bobby even made a comment on it and sent him home early because of it. His fuse was lit now and it was only a matter of time before things went bang.

When he got home he found the angel in the living room with his feet kicked up. He was actually wearing the lounge clothes he brought him, the sight simmering him down some. Cas looked like he didn’t have a care in the world as he watched some game show, he probably knew all the answers since the guy was like a billion years old. His hands were folded neatly in his lap like he was just waiting for Dean to get home, he only turned his head to look at the man, first taking in his dirty clothes then looking him straight in the eye.

“Hello Dean.”

“Hey Cas. We need to talk, but after I wash all this crap off of me.”

“I will be here.” He said as Dean walked further into the apartment.

After giving the angel a nod he went to his bedroom, throwing his soiled work clothes into the every growing laundry basket that he would have to get too later tonight. He took his time in the shower, lathering his skin thick with soap, actually washing his hair three times instead of the normal two. He wanted to be as clean as possible, and he also wanted to stall the inevitable conversation. Staying under the steady stream of hot water forever felt like a good idea until the water ran cold. That’s when he had to force himself out and dress in his most comfortable clothes.

Going back to the living room when he didn’t really want to was the hardest part, but after a couple deep breathes and dragging his hand through his hair a few times he was ready to face whatever this talk would bring. He found the angel still watching the same show and he sat next to him, grabbing the remote and shutting it off. The less distractions the better. He sat down and told the angel what Sam saw in his dream that night, how he felt about it, he even threw in some tidbits about how he felt about it. Cas listened with his usual laser focus, didn’t say a word until Dean was finished.

“Azazel is a demon Dean. He’s the only one I can think of with yellow eye, and he’s a vicious one at that.”

“Well why would Sam see something like that? He’s never been around any demons.”

“I wish I had an answer for you Dean, but I truly don’t know.”

For Dean that was disheartening to say the least. He needed answers and the angel couldn’t provide any for him. He didn’t take this lightly and was determined to keep the angel safe within this apartment. There was no way, with the sigils that any demon could get in here anyway. That much he knew for sure.

“Well there’s no way I’m letting you leave here without some protection.”

“Dean I assure you I will be alright. I would be able to sense a demon, especially one that powerful before he’d step foot in this building.”

“Even so, it’s either taking refuge in the penthouse or hanging with me until further notice.”

Dean’s fierceness to protect Cas didn’t go unnoticed by the angel. It made him quite pleased that though He didn’t really need it the human was determined to keep him safe. He nodded before retiring to his room to continue his reading.

*                             *                             *                             *

Its 4 in the morning. Pitch black outside. Here Dean is lying awake in his bed with his phone in his hand texting Charlie about his day. For some reason she is up as well, he doesn’t ask why since he’s glad he’s got someone to talk to. Of course the subject of Cas comes up. It was inevitable and unavoidable now that the red-head is aware of his crush on the angel. She thinks he should take the chance, the nose dive straight into telling him about his ever budding crush. The angel didn’t seem to experience emotion like a human did. Why would he? He’s a trillion old being from somewhere else entirely. Dude barely knew what a cell phone was until Dean taught him. How could he know the ins and outs of romantic feelings? Dean knew that Charlie meant well, but Dean thought it would be better to just form a friendship with the angel. That made more sense right?

Just as Dean was caught in the whirlwind of his own thoughts Cas burst through ahis door with an icy look on his face. He had that same blade he’d used on the werewolves in hand and he looked like he would kill anything that moved wrong without a second thought.

“Where’s the fire Cas?”

“Right here Dean.” An eerie voice sounded off near the bathroom door and he turned his head so fast from Cas he swore he gave himself whiplash.

There stood a man slightly shorter than Cas stood, probably had at least 40 years on Dean. He looked like your average senior citizen except for those nasty yellow eyes. They weren’t bright and sun-like as he assumed they would be, but like a milky pastel color that just made him uncomfortable. He knew better than to judge a book by its cover. If Cas said this demon was dangerous and vicious than he would take his word for it. As Cas made his way toward Dean’s side he jumped out of bed and put himself between the angel and demon.

“Oh look! An average joe is trying to protect a warrior of heaven. That’s almost cute.” He laughed.

“How the hell did you even get in here?” Dean roared.

“Dean you must learn that I’m smarter then to whoosh in without disarming your devil’s traps. I’m not a fool.”

“You must be a fool to come here at all!” a warm hand landed on his shoulder. The angel was trying to calm him down. How could he possibly calm down when some evil being just landed center stage in his bedroom? His mouth snapped shut so fast it hurt his jaw. Now was not the time for talking, but action. He turned for a second to grab the gun that he kept under his pillow since the night Castiel had saved him.

Once it was in hand he turned back to the adversary only for a flick of the demon’s wrist to knock it out of his hand and clattering to the floor on the other side of the room. With barely a second to react the angel was now in front of his pushing him back until he legs dug into the wood of the nightstand.

“Leave now demon!” Cas growled.

“I don’t think I will. I like it here.”

Cas made a move towards the demon and he was flung across the room like Dean’s gun. His body hit the wall on the other side of the bed with a nasty thunk. Crumpling to the floor for only a moment the angel was back on his feet and lunging towards the demon once again. The demon met him half way before pushing him with such force his body tore apart the other nightstand as he fell.

“I’m not here for you insects!” the demon yelled.

Dean heard a whoosh of wings before he saw yet another figure appear in the room. A short man with golden brown hair and glowing gold eyes stood proud. His shoulders rolled back and a blade just like Cas’ in his hand. Assuming he was an angel Dean felt the wash of relief that they’d received some help with this.

“Then you best get out of here.” The being smirked.

The demon turned his head to fix Dean with a hateful glare before his head whipped back and mouth open wide. A black, thick smoke flew out of his mouth, floating up and going through the ceiling. This was almost too much for Dean. It was one thing to deal with monsters throughout the world, but this was his home that he shared with the closest person to him. He felt violated in so many forms as he watched the lifeless body the demon had used, dropped to the floor.


	10. Nothing Unnoticed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A day late-yes, but it's a pretty long chapter so I hope that makes up for it! *crawls in hole* either way no real warnings for this one. Just a lot of explanations and set-up. Hope you enjoy it. Pleaasssse drop a comment or something. Let me know you're with me! Happy reading!

Life for Dean Winchester was becoming increasingly hard at the moment. The golden eyed angel rushed to Cas and helped him up. They hugged for a while, embracing each other with small smiles containing reprieve. Intruding feelings welled up within the man at the sight. He tried to lock it away before the green emotion got too much weight to it. Who was he to feel anything towards Cas being close with someone else? Who was he to feel anything at all? He’d barely known the angel a month and now was really the worse time for such petty feelings to come out to play. Priorities needed to be ordered, and on the top of the list upping the security in the apartment was one of them.

“Brother.” Cas voiced.

It’s slightly surprising how much that little word eased Dean’s view of their tight hug. So Cas considered this other dude to be his brother….not anything else. Good? And that’s all he allowed himself to think about that. He sat on his bed, head in his hands, and all the adrenaline draining from his body leaving him more than exhausted. He felt the bed dip next to him but he refused to look up. He felt that warm hand on his shoulder again and he wanted his entire being to be wrapped in that warmth.

“Are you alright Dean?”

“Am I alright?!” he finally looked up, looking directly into the angels laser gaze. “I wasn’t the one being flung across the room.”

“He didn’t do anything substantial to me.”

“Way to introduce a guy Cassie.” The other angel scoffed and interrupted. “What’s up Deano. I’m Gabriel.”

“Apologies Gabriel. Dean this is my brother. The archangel.”

“Archangel? That means you’re like super powerful right?”

“He is much more powerful than I am. I’m a seraph. Just a warrior.”

“Hey don’t talk about yourself like that Cassie. You’re not too shabby.” He sighed.

“Where have you been Gabriel? I’ve been trying to contact you for a while now.”

“I know, but I’m here now and that’s what matters. You know serious and dark stuff aren’t really my thing, but there’s some nasty things in play here. I came because I know this human is in your charge and you need to know this. Both of you.” He took a beat studying both of their faces before sighing again and continuing. “I’ll give you the abridged version. Azazel is the demon that killed your mother. While he was at it he infected Sam with his blood giving him some supernatural sparks.”

 “Woah woah.” Dean found himself standing now. Sitting was something you did to relax, something to calm yourself, he couldn’t possibly stay sitting now that he’d heard this little shitty nugget of news. Cas stood with him and placed a hand on the man’s shoulder, clearly having learned that a comforting touch was all Dean needed to get some mental clarity. Normally it did the trick, but not now, not with Sam fully inserted into this shithole disaster he’d found himself wrapped in with a bow. “So what are you saying?”

“Sam had had a dream last night about me dying by Azazel’s hand. Could that have been some sort of premonition?” Cas asked not letting Dean go.

“I’d bet a pretty penny on it. Seems like that his sparkly new powers coming out to play.”

Barreling through several emotions at the same time Dean didn’t even know what to do with himself right now. On one hand he wanted to toss the short angel out of the window for showing up with the worse news he’d ever received. He also wanted to hug the guy for cluing him in on something so important. So his mom’s death hadn’t been a mystery fire at all? Why would a demon go after her? Did it have to do with his Dad being a hunter?  That had to be it, a grudge that ended in revenge and ruined his family. Azazel was now the top spot on his new kill list.

“So what is going to happen to Sam?”

“Well from what the boys upstairs have gathered, there’s more kids out there like Sam. Varying in different powers, seems like Azazel is building some kind of child army. For who knows what. No one’s figured that out yet.”

“Great.” Dean scoffed in frustration. He’d long escaped Castiel’s grasp and was now pacing his room like his life depended on it. The two angel’s kept their gaze on him. Castiel looked stoic as usual, but Gabriel looked almost sad at Dean’s anxious state. How could be anything but anxious when his entire life was flipped upside down, inside out, and spread all over the floor?

“Listen Dean, I know this is a lot, but you need to hear about every ‘dream’ that your brother has. Your lives kind of depend on it right now.”

Dean turned to give the angel a snarky, sarcastic comeback when he noticed he was now licking an enormous lollipop that appeared from who knows where. _What the actual fuck?_ He thought. Cas gave Gabriel a mean side glance that could cut through steel, like his brother was the biggest embarrassment on the planet, and of course Dean was powerless to stop the small smirk that formed on his face.

*                             *                             *                             *

Time passed. With that Dean’s anxiety grew. Sam went on and graduated with no more ‘dreams’ occurring. It was a time of celebration and Dean would cut his own foot off before he let all the supernatural crap that was happening around him ruin this time for his family. He was proud of his brother to say the least. He’d gone on and done something Dean had never done, and that was making it through high school the right way (in his opinion thank you very much) and gotten accepted at Stanford. Dean would be a dirty liar if he said the thought of his kid brother being so far away didn’t scared the shit out of him, and he’d cut his other foot off before he’d let it show.

Dean was easily the loudest person in the auditorium when they called Sam’s name. Cas and Bobby sat on either side of him and clapped loudly and modestly despite his wild display of pride. Not an embarrassed atom in his being was present as he watched his brother walk across that stage and he hollered until his throat was sore. They threw a nice shindig of a bbq at Bobby’s after the graduation. Inviting the small group of friends that Dean had, Ellen and Jo from the Roadhouse, and Jess of course. Castiel was a silent, smiling presence throughout the festivities, and Dean was happy the angel was there, even if he was just protecting the two of them. A small piece of him hoped that Cas was there because he actually wanted to be there, but he tried his damndest not to think of that part. The angel certainly looked like he was having a good time, mingling with Bobby and laughing with Sam. He’d even tossed a few tender smiles Dean’s way and his heart just melted at that.

Despite all of that the silence from the other half of his world that surged so suddenly, casted a dark cloud over him. He was waiting for something to happen, itching for some new enemy to arise that he’d have to fight. That’s why outside of work he found himself searching everywhere for information about the evil that lurked in the night. His Father’s journal never too far away as he clacked at the keyboard of his laptop. He’d even gone out and brought his own journal, writing things down that’d he’d learned. He was surprised to find Azazel’s description in the old journal, but never his name. Clearly his Dad made great efforts to avenge his wife and made sure his sons were never attacked by the creature.

In his research he’d also found a shit ton of protection symbols to keep all kinds of evil at bay from his building. He’d never make the same mistake again and allow something evil to come there. He’d painted things in the black light paint at every doorway and any window that wasn’t within someone’s actual apartment. He carved symbols into the wood surrounding doorways, on stair banisters, on window sills. All precautions were taken, and it took him several weeks to do so.

Castiel on the other hand was back and forth between heaven and the apartment, trying to find out all that he could of what was at hand. Gabriel didn’t come around too often, and when he did it was just to come tease Dean.

Once instance in particular stood out in his mind for a couple of weeks after it had happened. Dean had just gotten out of a blazing shower, his muscles tight and tired after a hard day’s work. He walked out of his bathroom, skin and hair still damp and only a small towel wrapped around his waist, to find Gabriel sitting on his bed. Cross-legged with another damn lollipop in his hand and a smug smirk on his face. His eyes raked over Dean’s form way too intense for Dean’s comfort level. He almost fell on his ass he flinched so hard. As intrusive as Cas was, and his complete lack of understanding when it came to personal space, he’d never pulled a stunt like this.

“Gabe man what the fuck?!” he gasped trying to get his mental bearings straight.

“What’s going on with you and my little bro?” he asked completely disregarding Dean’s question.

Lick, lick. His pink tongue flicked against the flat end of the lollipop.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about man.”

“Oh but I think you do.” Lick, lick. “I’ve been watching you two.”

“I’m not sure what I’m supposed to say here.” He broke eye contact with the angel.

“You’ve got a thing for him don’t you Dean?”

His traitorous cheeks began to heat up. He couldn’t blame it on the heat of the shower, he’d been out long enough for his body to adjust to the temperature of the bedroom. Instead he chose to ignore the question and went to his dresser, looking for something to cover his practically naked body.

“I’ve seen the way you look at him when you think he’s not paying attention. Your eyes following his every move. That little smile the crawls onto your face when he’s talking to someone close to you. The little touches on his arms and shoulders.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Of course lying was his go-to. It had been for years. Deflect and discredit. Those moves got him out of a lot of heavy conversations, be it with his brother, one-night stands, the few short relationships he’d had.

“But you do though.”

Goodness could this dude be any more annoying!? Apparently he could because when Dean finally looked at him again he had a shit eating grin on his face that said he just knew Dean was full of it. With that he gathered his clothes and stalked off to the bathroom trying to keep his towel in place. He slammed the door behind him and got dressed in a huff. When he emerged from the room Gabriel, of course, was gone.

*                             *                             *                             *

A whole lot of nothing happened in the days that led up to Sam leaving for Stanford. It almost felt like things were back to normal. Almost meaning that Castiel was an interesting addition to the normal. On days where he wasn’t in heaven he hung out with Dean. A lot of that together time consisted of comfortable silence that got less and less awkward as time went by. Dean was undeniably comfortable around the angel, enough that a lot of unconscious touches were exchanged between the two. He’d only noticed how much they did after Gabriel made it known. That of course didn’t stop Dean from doing it, the actions came natural, and he just noticed he’d done them now. The angel brought him all sorts of warm feelings of comfort. Sure they weren’t always purely platonic feelings, but he was done trying to kill those off. They were invincible little threads that were growing with time. It was like trying to kill a gnat, you thought you had the sucker until it suddenly appears once again buzzing in your face. He couldn’t avoid the unavoidable so now he was just rolling with it.

 On the rare occasion that Bobby wasn’t available when someone needed something fixed in their apartment he’d asked Dean to do it. Castiel often accompanied him with these tasks, if only to discreetly add protection symbols in places that would be overlooked while Dean did the actual work. More often than not the owner of the apartment wouldn’t even be home when he came by, so he’d use Bobby’s master keys to let themselves in. Dean wasn’t particularly close to anyone in the building, but he was known by pretty much everyone and they had a friendly neighbor to neighbor relationship. They did every apartment they entered, but paid more attention to placement for those who had kids. Kids are notorious for getting into everything, and the last thing he needed was for Bobby to get a complaint about finding ancient carvings under their rug.

The dreaded day had finally arrived, on a scorching hot day in August, Sammy was leaving. His brother had so much stuff it couldn’t fit in the Impala, he wasn’t about to mess up his leather interior because his brother decided he’d take his whole life with him to school. They borrowed one of Bobby’s trucks and packed all the boxes in the back, and packed the middle seat of the cabin with snacks for their road trip. Dean would drive him there, stay for a night and another day before hitting the road again. Sam had tried to convince him to stay another night but he couldn’t do that. If he did he’d make the silly, unthoughtful decision to uproot his life and stay for good.

 Cas had made the decision to stay behind and hold down the fort, should anything happen while Dean was gone. He was more and more grateful to the angel with every little thing he’d done for the brothers. He felt Cas was going above and beyond his simple protection mission. For one he didn’t have to live with them to protect them, Dean did that for convenience sake at first and had grown to crave the angel’s presence in the apartment. He didn’t have to hang out with them as much as he did. He’d even helped Sam study for his final exams, and the SAT’s. Angel was pretty freaking smart too. He did so much that’d he’d become a part of Dean’s life, not so much as integrated as Sam, Bobby, and Charlie, but he pretty damned close.

So Dean and Sam went on their way with their road trip. It went as well as he expected it too, with laughs galore and heart to hearts. He was a bit weary about those but drudged through it because he wouldn’t be seeing his brother for a while. This was such a long trip that he couldn’t possibly make in his leisure. Nonetheless they had a great time and before they knew it they were pulling up to the campus entrance. The grass was greener than he’d ever seen it and parking was easy. It took them a couple of hours before they’d loaded all the boxes and bags into his suite once they’d found it.

“Wow Sammy you lucked out with this room.” Dean said as he pulled some crumpled shirts out of the box. Sam’s packing had no rhyme or reason to it. He just threw things in the cardboard and taped it up. He was much neater than his kid brother and took the time to shake out each garment and hung it neatly on the hangers and putting them in their rightful place in the closet.

“Yeah I know. I registered early enough to get the suite. I wouldn’t have minded so much sharing a room, but it’s nice to have my own space.”

They spent the bulk of the day setting up his room to how he liked it. Once the hard work was done Dean wanted nothing more than to kick back with a couple of beers and a movie or two, but with his brother being under 21 he had to adhere to the laws that stood outside of their apartment. Settling on his newly made up bed he fixed Dean with his ‘I wanna talk about something uncomfortable’ face.

“So Dean…don’t get tense or anything, but I gotta ask. What’s going on with you and Cas?”

Don’t get tense? Well that’s all he could do in that moment. If they’d been so close lately that even his kid brother noticed it then this was much father out of hand than Dean intended it to be.

“Not sure what you mean Sam.” He averted his gaze to the large stack of books taking up most of his brother’s desk space.

“Well…ok. Whatever is going on just know that I support you.”

And if that wasn’t daunting then Dean didn’t know what it was. He enjoyed to rest of his stay with his brother, spending time helping him sign up for classes and signing off on anything that needed to be signed since he was Sam’s brother but also his guardian. They parted with tight hugs and promises to check in as much as possible.

Dean found himself a little lost on the drive home, this would be the first time the Winchester brothers were apart for such a long period of time, and he found himself missing him already once he crossed the state line. The thoughts being pushed aside as they often were led to more stressful thoughts surrounding the subject of Cas. It was high time he reigned in his fiery crush on the angel. It seemed like a pointless desire, something he couldn’t afford right now. He was worried about Sam’s safety. It was hard to ward the suite, but he’d done it discreetly as he’d done their home. Symbols carved into the bed posts with a pocket knife, spray painted devil traps under the rug he convinced Sam he just had to have. Pulled out all his knowledge to keep his brother as safe as possible.

Luckily he made it home with minimal stops, walking into his apartment a little after 1am. He was downright exhausted. Muscles he didn’t even knew he had were aching. Crawling under the warm comforters of his bed and a memory foam mattress were all that were on his mind right now, that was until he got a glance of the angel sitting on his bed.

“Hello Dean.” A small smile played across his ever dry yet soft looking lips.

“Heya Cas. What’s going on?”

“I wanted to let you know that a few of my brother’s were sent to keep watch over Sam. Gabriel had requested a few that are close to him to go to the school as a favor to him.”

That dark, tense cloud that hung so close over Dean’s head was suddenly whisked away with just that one sentence. So friends of Cas were going to help protect his brother now? That eased such a giant chuck of his worry that he didn’t know what to do with himself. Happy news always had a way of casting a light amongst the darkness, no matter how small the spark seemed. He nodded and patted the angel on the shoulder giving his thanks before he went to the bathroom with fresh sleep clothes in his hands in search of the scorching warmth his shower would bring him. Sure he was still worried with his brother being so far away from him at the moment, but if these guys were personal friends, even if they were just Gabe’s, he felt that he could trust them. He’d still check on Sam every day when he could just to have the reassurance through their contact.

But of course when he gets out the shower and finally crawls under the soft comfort of his comforters and his memory foam mattress, Crowley calls him. As much as his tired body is screaming at him to ignore the call and fall pray to the sweet siren song of slumber he should answer it just off the strength that its Crowley. He expects that when he calls his call is answered. Dean’s heard stories passed around that guys get roughed up for ignoring the guy and he’s got enough going on and adding himself to Crowley’s shit list seems like a bad decision right now. He yanks the phone out from under his pillow and puts it to his ear.

“Dean.”

“Yeah man.” He clears his throat trying to get the exhaustion out of his voice.

“I know It is a late hour but what I have to say is important so wake up.” Dean is sure that he hears the rustling of him moving around in his warm cocoon so that he can sit up. He waits until the noise stops before he continues. “Now I know that your brother has gone off to school and I just needed to tell you that I’ve got some of my personal staff watching him, alongside whatever heavenly hosts your angel has sent. Sam is well guarded, so don’t worry your pretty little head about him. I need you to come to the house at 10am sharp. We have much to discuss.” And with that he hangs up the phone.

*                             *                             *                             *

It’s 9 am and Dean’s just woken up. He hadn’t expected to find the angel sitting at his feet when he wiped the sleep from his eyes but he is. Sitting there in his suit and trench coat looking like he’s about to close a deal with a very important client. His fluffy hair is in every direction it can possibly be and Dean wouldn’t make mention of it cause he likes it too much. Then he remembers that right before his head hit the pillow once again he’d texted Cas letting him know that they had to meet with Crowley this morning. His dry hand crawled out of the blankets to swipe over his hair one time before he made the effort to actually sit up.

“I’ve made coffee. You should get up now to avoid being late to your appointment.”

“You know how to work a coffee machine?” he wanted to get up, but he kept the blankets firmly folded in his lap with his hands on top of it. He’d only worn a t-shirt and his boxer briefs to sleep, completely forgoing any pants. His morning boner is risen and heavy and the well-dressed angel sitting on his bed wasn’t making it go down any time soon. Another thing to add to his list of ‘last thing Dean Winchester needs’ was letting the angel see it. He wasn’t budging from this spot until his room was an angel-free zone.

“I asked Charlie.”

“Of course you did.” Dean didn’t mind the two of them being friends. He rather liked that he had someone outside of the angel that he could talk about all this supernatural stuff with. Hell Charlie had started her own research and made it a point to feed Dean any new info she found that she thought would be useful to him. It was more so the fact that she knew of his feelings for Cas that bothered him. Knowing in his heart of hearts that Charlie would never betray his trust like that and let the info leak, he was still a little worried about how close they were getting. His paranoia was at an all time high and he had no place to start with rectifying the issue of the crush or the fact that Cas and Charlie were friends. “Go on out to the kitchen while I get dressed. It won’t take me long.”

The angel hummed in response and as soon as he was out the door Dean let out a sigh of relief. Tossing his bedding aside he got dressed fairly quickly. Taking extra care not to rustle his naughty bits too much in a effort of killing the problem all together. He went out of the room and into the kitchen to find Cas pouring the coffee into the mug then holding it out for him to take. One sip in and he realized this was the strongest cup of coffee he’s ever had. Immediately the caffeine thrummed through his veins and his body has humming with new energy.

“Damn Cas. This is strong as hell.” He took another ginger sip as the coffee was still piping hot. He ignored the heat in favor of the bitter warmth it provided him.

“Is that a bad thing?” he cocked his head to the side in his usual confusion gesture. Dean tried not to think of it as adorable and cute, but alas he’d failed.

“No it’s amazing. Good job.”

“Charlie said she would teach me how to make lattes the next time she came over. Is it alright if she comes after your meeting? She said she had a lunch date with a woman she’s seeing romantically.”

“Yeah she can come. We’ll probably have a lot to dissect after talking to Crowley.” He took another sip before asking a question that had been burning in his head for a while. “So you’re cool with Charlie dating someone of her own gender? Isn’t that like frowned upon or whatever?”

“Heaven does not care about sexual orientation. If that is what you’re asking.”

“So it’d be cool with a guy…liking you…romantically? Since you’re a guy.”

“I’m not a guy Dean. I am a celestial being. We are without gender. I simply chose a male vessel for reasons that have nothing to do with his gender. If I had found someone of another gender that could house me in the time that I was allotted to choose then I would have.”

“Cool cool.” He chastised himself for such a lame response, but what do you even say to that?

“Gender is a very human concept Dean. Physical makeup has little to do with it.”

“Well yeah I know that. Just was wondering is all.”

And with that Dean was more than done with his conversation. He spoke entirely without thinking his words through and if he knew anything about himself, which he in fact did, than he knew that doing so could take a turn for the worse. They finished their coffee and were on their way to Crowley’s. Sitting in comforting silence was slowly becoming their thing. So was Dean glancing at the angel when he wasn’t looking. Now was not a good time for that since he was driving, and he’d just blatantly ran a red light getting distracted by that wild dark hair, and piercing blue gaze.

They walked into the worn down house and were greeted with silence. Harold held the door open for them and with an outstretched, muscled arm he ushered them into the entryway. Not another person in sight. Not even Crowley. Dean assumed he was probably in the lofty bomb shelter he called an office. This immediately put him on edge, the heated crawl of anxiety rising within him. All of this spelled out bad news and he looked to the angel, hoping his face would convey his concern since he was without words and they were alone. It got him wondering if maybe he could communicate with the angel in his mind. It made sense right? That of all the cool things he’d seen Cas do so far that something like telepathy should be tossed into the mix. It was lame in comparison to the smiting two finger touch he could do, but why not have it.

Harold started walking towards the stairs beckoning with his head for Dean to follow, and of course the angel followed him. Each step taken earned him a gold star on his nervousness chart. He’d never seen the house empty like this. Throughout the entirety of him working for Crowley there was always at least someone other than Harold in the house. Sometimes Crowley himself didn’t have to be here, but someone always was. The emptiness just wasn’t sitting right with him. The hulking man raised a hand and knocked three quick hits on the heavy metal door. A few seconds, hell maybe even hours, Dean couldn’t tell, passed before Crowley opened the door. His brows were creased in the middle of his forehead. The small roundish man looked—worried. He’d never seen Crowley look anything outside of pompous and confident, or wrapped in rage. This did nothing to ease the panic attack that threatened to burst out of Dean’s chest.

“Come inside and sit. We have a lot to talk about.”

Dean did as he was told, sliding tensely into the chair hoping its comfortability would help him. It didn’t. What did help, however, was the angel standing behind him and laying a hand on his shoulder. Crowley regarded them with a suspicious glance, his eyes flicking back and forth between them before he sighed and looked down at his desk.

“Castiel there are two chairs here.”

“I’m well aware, but I’ve chosen to stand.”

Crowley rolled his eyes before turning his attention back to Dean. It was like he was looking for something in Dean’s expression, anything that would clue him in on what was going on in the man’s head. He schooled his expression as soon his right foot touched those steps. Emotion equaled weakness and he refused to show either of those.

“Let’s not beat around the bush here shall we? Dean, do you remember that very important thing I told you the morning after you met your angel?”

“That you’re on my side.”

“And do you believe that? I’ve got people as we speak—watching over your brother 24/7. Making sure he’s doing all the things he needs to do. Killing anything trying to get at him. Keeping Azazel as far away from him as possible.”

Dean wasn’t surprised any longer about the amount of stuff that Crowley knew at this point. He was more involved in all of this than the man would probably ever let on. Castiel on the other hand, said hand tightened where it still sat on Dean’s shoulder.

“How do you know about Azazel and his connection to Sam?” his voice came and shattered the low volume atmosphere this conversation was taking.

“I know a great deal of things Castiel but I believe I asked Dean a question.”

“Yeah Crowley I hear you, so get on with whatever this is.”

The man sighed and rolled his eyes before he spoke. “I’m a demon Dean.”

The next couple minutes consisted of the most physical exertion Dean’s had to put forth in weeks. As soon as Crowley’s sentence ended Cas went into battle mode. That long silver blade appeared in his hand out of nowhere and he was gunning straight for Crowley. Dean had to leap into action faster than he leapt into Rhonda Hurley’s bed all those years ago. He was trying to be an effective barrier between the raging celestial being and Crowley, but he wasn’t doing such a great job. His arms were spread wide and his legs were too as he crowded entirely into the angel’s space.

“Cas just wait a minute!” he yelled.

“He’s an agent of Hell Dean and he needs to be—“

“I get it Cas really I know, but he’s got people watching over Sam and I don’t have a reason not to at least hear him out.”

That’s what made Castiel finally stop…for the most part. He kept his blade firmly in his hand, the coldest gaze he’d ever seen trained on the man behind him. Dean placed his hands on the angel’s shoulders hoping the same touch would do for him what it did for himself. And about now was when he noticed just how close he and the angel were to each other. Close enough that he could smell his shampoo in his hair, and the smell of a fresh summer rain. A scent he could only assume was the angel’s natural fragrance.

“Before I get my throat slit I wanted to give you this. As a vote of confidence.”

Dean gave Cas one last pleading look before he turned back to Crowley, making sure the angel stayed put behind him. in Crowley’s hand sat what looked like a strange knife, and upon further inspection he found that speculation to be true. The hilt was ordinary wood with a flared base, the blade had jagged edges and on it’s surface were engraved characters.

“This is a knife that with a simple stabbing can kill a demon. No exorcism needed.” He took a pause. “I’m giving you this as I said, a vote of confidence. I’m truly on your side Dean.”

Dean eyed the knife for a moment. Not only could Cas probably rip the demon to shreds off sheer principle, but now he was giving Dean a weapon that could wipe him off the face of the Earth. Either Crowley had more confidence in Dean than he could ever have in himself, or he was plain stupid. He reached out his hand offering Dean the blade. Before Dean could even move a muscle Cas was in front of him taking the blade and inspecting it with his head tilted to the side. Of course his barricade tactic was foolish, Cas could’ve gotten away all along. So why hadn’t he?

He handed the knife to Dean without a word. Not so much as a glance in his direction. No his eyes were still glued to Crowley.

“Now that we’ve got that out the way, on to more depressing matters.” Crowley took his seat and Dean did the same. “So you’re aware that your dad is a hunter. Well a long time ago your mother had made a deal with a demon. This led to Azazel wanting to put his mark on your brother. You’re Dad made a deal with that same demon that led to him going to hell.”

“Whoa, whoa wait!” Dean shouted. “I feel like I’m missing a hell of a lot of this timeline. And aren’t you working with Azazel anyway? He was here that day before all this shit with down. When you sent me to La Aube.”

“The details aren’t important Dean what is important is that you and your brother are to be kept alive. Bad things happen if you in particular die. I’m merely a double agent here. I have my suspicions that Azazel already knows what side I’m on.”

“This isn’t making sense demon.” Castiel growled. “Dean is right. There’s a lot missing.”

 “I may be a demon, but I’m also a business man, I place my money on the stock that most likely to bear fruit, so to speak. My money is on you Dean.” He turned his attention to the angel. “You can fact check me with the boys upstairs. I’m sure they can tell you why Dean needs protecting.” He took a pause. “I’ve got places to go and hell to raise so I must get going. I just wanted to give you that and to remind you of where I stand. You’re the righteous man Dean and the apocalypse is upon us boys.”


	11. Cover to Cover

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Holy Crap! Yes I know I'm the trash beneath your feet. My muse for this story went on a bit of a vacation, but she's back now so I'm posting again yay! My work schedule is a little wonky at the moment but I will be posting every other Friday now. No real warnings for this chapter, just a little violence and a little blood, nothing graphic or anything. Anyways I hope you enjoy! Leave me a comment or something. xoxo

Dean and Castiel left Crowley’s with more questions than answers. So he was the righteous man? Whatever the hell that was supposed to mean. The thing that struck him the most wasn’t that a bunch of demons were trying to jumpstart the end of the world, it was that his Dad was in hell, being tortured for a deal he’d made. Crowley didn’t know what the deal was and that was the answer he wanted the most. So him and Sam somehow played such a big part in keeping the big blue marble afloat now? He didn’t know what to make of this pressure and he damn sure wasn’t as capable as Fate made him out to be. Cas told him he would seek out answers from upstairs. Maybe the Heavenly host would have more to offer than Crowley would. When he was finished with his little action movie speech and thrusted Dean into a protagonist role that he had never asked for the angel had looked like he reached an understanding. Like he knew what this righteous man business was all about. He would let him do his thing and come with answers for Dean later.  
Now he found himself working up a good sweat in Bobby’s salvage yard, looking for parts that would be of good use on future cars. The summer sun lingered in the sky for far longer than it should have been, his shirt clinging to him dripping with perspiration. He was suffering. Bobby might not want to admit it but the man is getting too old for such manual labor like this. So when he said he needed parts, Dean was more than happy to take on the task. He was getting a couple of ‘in good condition’ hoses from under the hood of an ancient Toyota when he decided he had enough. What was a couple more freckles earned under the sun? He whipped off his t-shirt and got back to work.   
This lasted for an undetermined amount of time, he’d gathered quite a few parts. Swiping the sweat from his forehead before it dripped in his eyes, the only things that stopped him was Bobby yelling, demanding that he come in the house, and the sun was starting to go down. Dean walked back to the place he discarded his shirt and shook it off all the dirt that gathered on it.   
“Yeah Yeah Bobby I’m coming!” he hollered walking towards the house.   
Once he was inside he went straight for the kitchen in search of something cold to drink. Most people would seek water on a hot day like this, but Dean would rather have a nice icy beer to quench him.   
Bobby knew what was up because as soon as he walked through the door frame he was offering the younger man a beer. That was until he looked at Dean’s chest and the bottle slipped from his hand only to crash to the floor.   
* * * *  
Life for Castiel was peculiar and getting more interesting the more time he had to spend on earth. Being at Sam’s college was like entering another dimension. The youth of today were nothing like they were a couple hundred years ago, on his last visit to Earth. He followed Sam throughout some of his day, making sure he was neither seen nor heard. From what he observed Sam was a good student. He attended all his classes, took notes, and paid attention during his lessons. Some of his peers seemed like they weren’t as engrossed in the curriculum as he was, but they all seemed to be working towards their goals. What shocked him the most were the gatherings they threw. Sam wasn’t one for these things, but he was persuaded by a few of his new friends. They called it the “college experience”, though to Castiel it seemed like Sam was being swept away to a den of iniquity. There were countless bottles of alcohol being poured and drunken, half naked people touching each other in a strange form of dance, the music was far too loud for such a small space. Though his friends were all smiling and having a goof time, Sam looked uncomfortable and like he wanted to leave. Castiel could agree with that sentiment. Even though he didn’t participate in any of this he still felt like he wanted to escape. He wondered if Dean would have a good time at this ‘party’. Would he enjoy people rubbing on him in sensual ways? Would he like to imbibe in obscene amounts of alcohol in a short period of time? Would he enjoy the music?   
He was torn from his thoughts of the man when Sam slipped out the backdoor of the building walking towards his own. That’s when Castiel felt it. The cold, disgusting feeling he got when a demon was near. He called out to his brothers sensing there were more than what he could handle. Mael and Asaiel appeared at his side with their blades in hand. That’s when the first demon decided to make its move. He turned to his right, drawing his blade and stabbed it under the ribcage. He always felt a tinge of sadness when he had to kill a demon wrapped in a human’s body, the person didn’t deserve to die like this, although it was necessary. Exorcising them was not ideal in battle due to it taking too long. The next one is a little more careful than the last, he circles around Castiel, waiting for his moment to strike. Thinking before acting is always the smart thing to do, but when your adversary is much faster and more agile than you are it is indeed futile. As soon as he made his move he was put down just as fast.  
More demons came after the initial 4 and it was getting more difficult to fight them all. As he stood his ground against two of them he hadn’t known there was a third behind him until one of Crowley’s had put it down. Mael began to move away from the main battle, amidst the chaos it was hard to tell what was what and she needed space. She was soon overwhelmed and as Castiel tried to get to her he was too late. She had been disarmed and her own weapon used against her. The glow of her grace seeped out of her open mouth and widened eyes. She fell in a lifeless heap, the shadows of her wings forever burned on the blacktop.   
Castiel was distracted by his fallen sibling, so much so that he hadn’t noticed a demon advancing towards him quickly. His focus snapped in place just in time that the blade only grazed his side. This was quickly becoming a losing fight, but he had to get through it. The Winchesters must not die.  
* * * *  
“Son—where did you get that symbol from?” Bobby grunted thrusting a finger towards Dean’s chest.  
Oh Shit!  
He’d forgotten all about the small tattoo on his chest. Not having it for long, and it being in a place that he didn’t look at outside of getting dressed and undressed he had simply forgot about it. Luckily his mind quickly provided a feasible lie for him. Surely Bobby could have seen his Dad’s tattoo. He could just give him the same story that he gave his brother when they got it.  
“It’s the same one Dad had.” He went to the kitchen closet to grab the mop and the broom to clean up the mess the older man made. “What’s with the freak out Bobby?” he laughed.  
As soon as the question was out of his mouth that’s when he realized. He wouldn’t get upset if he simply recognized the symbol as what John had on himself. The surprise had to come from knowing what the symbol meant, and seeing it on Dean added a thicker layer to the shock. Bobby did his best to reel it back thought. He grabbed the dust pan and the broom from Dean and began cleaning up the glass while he cleaned up the spilled beer. As much as both men clearly wanted to let this go and move on from it, Dean couldn’t just do that. He needed to know the truth.  
“You know what this means don’t you?” at first the other man avoided Dean’s gaze, looking anywhere but at him.   
“Why do you know what it means is the real question here?” he finally met Dean’s eyes and sighed. “Yeah I know what it means. Got one myself.” He bent and pulled up his pant leg showing the same star in flames on his ankle.   
“So you know about hunting? The supernatural? All those creepy crawlies of the night?”   
“Use to be a hunter—so yeah. That still don’t answer my question. How do you know?” he grabbed Dean a fresh bottle out of the fridge and sat at the table, beckoning him to do the same.  
“That’s a long ass story Bobby.”  
“I’m an old man, I got time.”  
So Dean did just that. Told the whole story cover to cover, with Cas showing up and saving his life, to Crowley and his still mysterious part in all this. He even shared the fact that the angel now lives in his house, he talked about the werewolf hunt they went on, the fact that Sam knew nothing and how he wanted to keep it that way. How Charlie knows about all this because she was the first human Cas had met when he dropped down from upstairs. Bobby didn’t say a word throughout it, just sipped on his beer and grunted every now and again. When he was done the song was long gone, and if it weren’t for the drink in his hand he was sure his throat would be dry from talking for so long.   
“Can’t believe you didn’t tell me about all this man. You just kept me in the dark this whole life.”  
“When your mom passed, your Dad was wrecked with grief, and overtaken by revenge. He didn’t want you boys to have any part in that. I agreed so I volunteered to watch after you boys. The life was getting a bit much for me, and I was getting older so I wanted to retire.”  
“So you left hunting so you could be responsible for two snot nosed kids that weren’t yours?” he snorted a laugh.  
“Hey.” Bobby snapped. “It was my pleasure to raise you boys. No one said it was easy, hell with the way you went through your teenage years it was a damned nightmare half the time. Don’t mean I didn’t enjoy it. Don’t mean I don’t consider you my sons.”  
“You could’ve told me though.” Dean was most definitely not pouting.   
“No I couldn’t. Your Dad’s decision to keep you out was a damned good one. I wasn’t going to disrespect his wishes for you two. Especially after his death.”   
They talked until it was late in the evening. Blowing through two 6-packs of beer. It was good to spend time with Bobby like this, he hadn’t done it in so long. They talked about all things hunting. Dean learned far more than what he could’ve gotten from the internet and his Dad’s journal alone. Bobby was a compendium of information, he had so many lore books it would take Dean a century to get through. At the end of the night Bobby sent him on his way with a few of his favorites and instruction to read them all. Cover to cover.  
* * * *  
Dean was wary from the beginning, letting Sam go to Stanford without him following. Sure he wanted his brother to go into adulthood gracefully, very much unlike he did. That didn’t mean he wasn’t riddled with worry. Dean was tossed into it against his will once their father had died. He remembers that day more vivid than any other day in his life. The doctors had called him early that morning, talking about the worsening of his condition. He immediately dropped everything and went to see him. There he laid in that hospital bed looking smaller and frailer than he had a few days prior. He barely recognized him as his father. A hard man built of steel had been reduced to so little, all of it was finally crashing down on Dean. His Father had struggled talking, telling him his usual lecture about watching over Sammy and keeping him safe, not letting him go dark side. Back then he had no clue what that even meant, just thought it was the sickness talking. The only difference between this and the countless other times his father had told him, this time he included that Dean should watch out for himself as well. That alone hit Dean harder than actually watching the man take his last breath. That he had been expecting, accepting it for months now. The admissions of ‘I love you’ and ‘I’m proud of you’ smacked Dean in the face like a sudden rain storm in a desert. He wasn’t the same after that day.  
Now Sam was miles and miles away with no clue of the type of protecting Dean had sent with him. He was worried beyond compare but fear had won the fight and he wouldn’t tell Sam about what’s in the dark. With that in mind he’d sent him. Blind and alone. With Crowley’s promise and Castiel’s friends he’d sent him. It’s been a month since Sam’s been gone now and they’ve been skyping every night since he’d dropped him off. He didn’t want to seem clingy and overbearing but he had always been that way with his brother. They were a constant in each other’s lives. No matter where they went or what they did it was the two of them. Now one of them was gone and Dean was doing everything he could to fill that hole.   
Even with the video calls and the near constant texting Cas makes it a point to pop in every other day to make sure Sam is alright. And he makes sure to tell Dean every detail. He’s so grateful to the angel. On the bad sire of this Cas’ actions are doing nothing to put out the fire being Dean’s every growing crush. Those eternal eyes staring at him as he shares the tales of Sam’s daily life, it causes an itch within   
Dean that he can never get relief for.  
And of course as he thinks about said angel he whooshes into the room right behind him. He turns and almost jumps a food off the ground and his sudden appearance. After the initial shock it’s replaced by an aching concern at the state Cas is in. His trench coat is hanging half off of him, his tie is missing and his shirt is bloody. Clearly he fought his way out of something. What that something was is his last concern, he needs to get his angel in better shape.  
He jumps into action, wrapping and arm around Castiel’s waist and ushering him into his bedroom. Sitting him down on the bed he reaches under it and pulls out a long, red plastic case full of first aid supplies.   
“Hello Dean.” The angel winced.   
“I’m gonna need to take all this off Cas.” He gingerly starts to remove the trench coat, finding a large spot of blood seeping through the shirt on his side.   
Why wasn’t the angel healing himself? Their run in with Alastair had barely phased him. He removed the shirt to see the long gash that stretched from his side almost to his belly button.  
“The hell happened?! And why can’t you heal yourself?” he tossed the ruined shirt behind him and started pulling heaps of gauze out of the kit.  
“An angel blade did this. I cannot heal it so easily. It will take time to close up.” Then angel leaned to his good side and put his arm behind him.  
Dean set about the task of patching the angel up. He wanted to know who did this so he could skin him alive. An angel blade? Was Cas being attacked by his own people. That would be super fucked out and Dean wanted to do whatever it took to rectify this.   
“There was some resistance, as I was watching over your brother.”   
Dean stopped all that he was doing, a piece of tape to hold the gauze in place, held between his shaking fingers.  
“Sam is fine I assure you.” He continued. “I don’t even think he was the target. The demons were going after the angels Gabriel has posted there.” He took a pause, his gaze turning towards the wall behind Dean. “One of my siblings unfortunately fell.”  
“I’m so sorry Cas.” He was relieved to hear about Sam being ok and with that he finished his task. He got up and went to his dresser, grabbing one of his old t-shirts he brought to Cas and helped him tug it on. He went to the angel’s room and grabbed a pair of sweatpants since his would be far too large for him.   
Once they were both ready for bed, he motioned for Cas to join him in his room. Pulling down the blankets and helping crawl under them before he got in by his side and pulled them up to their necks. Dean wasn’t good at comfort, not in words anyway. He suspected that Cas would be able to get the point without them, just reading into his actions. He turned away from the angel and snuggled close to him until his back hit his chest. He felt Cas snake an arm around his middle and pull him closer still. Though his heart was beating fast and he wanted nothing more than to turn around and kiss Cas’ sadness away, he settled for this. The soft sounds of their breathing were the only noises to be heard until Dean slipped into slumber with thoughts of going to Stanford tomorrow hanging off the edges of his mind.  
* * * *  
There was a girl.  
Sam rolled his eyes at himself because there always was a girl. This girl however was not the type he’d usually go for. She had dark hair unlike Jess. She was taller than Jess. She wore dark clothes unlike Jess. She was foul mouthed and full of attitude unlike Jess. She was the complete opposite of Jess and somehow he wanted her still. They had quite a few classes together this semester. Enough that they either had the same major or one very similar. She was witty, outspoken, sarcastic, and he had a feeling she didn’t like him very much.   
With that in mind he was very surprised to see her walking towards his dim light corner in the back of the library. He found this little golden spot at the start of the semester shortly after his brother brought him here. It was the quietest part of the already quiet library, he got most of his work done here since he couldn’t do much in the way of studying at his dorm. His suite-mates were always up to something and always felt the need to drag him along with them. Now here he was sitting there with Ruby Taffer making her way over.   
“Sam Winchester.” She smiled, flashing rows of perfect white teeth. “We have much to discuss.”


	12. Let's Avoid Perdition

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey Hey! Another chapter to add to this ride. Man I am struggling with this story. It has a mind of its own and it's fighting me so hard, but nonetheless I will carry on. Not too many warnings for this one, just some canon typical violence. As always happy reading! Leave a comment or something, let me know how I'm doing. xoxo

Life for Dean Winchester was increasingly annoying at the moment. Castiel just wouldn’t let it go. Dean was going to Stanford today whether he liked it or not. He’d already called Bobby and let him know what was going on and Charlie was coming to house sit for a little bit. She’d warded her place like he taught her too, but he’d feel much better if she was at his place since there was a literal Warrior of Heaven living there.   
He finished packing the Impala, much to Cas’ frustration, and was on his way after a flutter of wings announced the angel’s departure. As he drove to the sounds of Zepplin he thought about last night. Cas basically cuddled him to sleep. Dean had never done that with anyone. Not any of his long term relationships and certainly not his one night stands. That was a first for him and he was pretty sure the angel didn’t run around cuddling humans like that in his spare time. He liked it nonetheless, and it was getting pretty damn hard to ignore the feelings nagging at his ribcage. The end of the world was hanging over their heads and he was thinking about his romantic feelings for a celestial being eons over his age. This needed to be squashed he knew that but it just wouldn’t go beyond the walls of his mind.   
He sang along to the music as best as he could, though he was highly off key. Once he arrived unannounced to the school he immediately sauntered up to Sam’s suite, let in by one of his suitemates and didn’t even bother to knock on his brother’s door. That had been his first mistake because the sight before his eyes was one he’d rather not ever have to see…like ever. There his younger brother was shirtless with some dark haired girl with her shirt off as well. Awkward hands touching everywhere they could reach and their lips smacked together in a rather loud kiss. It looked like a death battle and the only weapon you had was your mouth. He stood there wide eyed for a few moments before he got himself together, noticing his presence still wasn’t known despite his pretty loud entrance. He cleared his throat at an obnoxious volume. They didn’t part until Sam opened one eye and saw Dean standing there, then and only then had he jumped away from the girl as if she spontaneously combusted. The girl noticed Sam’s horror and with no shame at all turned to face Dean and then slowly grabbed her shirt and put it on.   
“Dean!”  
“That is my name.” he deadpanned.   
“What are you—I mean I’m happy to see you—why didn’t you call?” his brother stammered searching pretty frantically for his own shirt.   
“I should probably get going anyway. I have class in a half hour.” The girl stood and grabbed her bag from the floor. “Nice to meet you big brother.” She patted Dean on the shoulder and exited the room.   
“It’s not what it looks like Dean.”  
“Oh I’m sure it is.”  
“No, no we were gonna study and then we started talking about---things, and then we just started—what you saw.”  
“It’s not that serious Sam, you’ve caught me in much more…interesting positions.”  
“Yeah.” He scoffed. “What are you doing here anyway?”   
“I can’t come visit my little brother?”  
“Well you could’ve called or texted or something.”  
“I’m sorry should I have checked with the big time lawyer’s assistant first?” he chuckled.   
“Luckily for you I don’t have much lined up this week.” Sam laughed at Dean’s bad excuse for a joke.  
“So what’s the story with miss dark hair?” he asked as he sat on the bed next to him.   
“Well we’re in a couple of classes together and I don’t know she just approached me in the library and we clicked. To be honest with you I thought she didn’t even like me.”  
Dean cringed as his next question came to mind but he just had to ask. “What happened with Jess?”  
“We just kind of broke it off. It was a mutual thing.” He answered with his head down. Dean felt instantly bad about dampening the mood. “We’re on opposite sides of the country ya know?”  
“Yeah, no I get it man. So what’s new? Besides a new girl what’s going on with you?”   
“I’ve only been here for a month and its felt like an eternity.”  
“Getting along with your suitemates ok?”  
“Yeah they’re great guys. They really take the whole ‘college experience’ thing seriously. I’ve been to more parties since I’ve been here than I’ve been in my whole life. These people go pretty hard.”  
And with that Sam went into detail about what’s been happening since he’d been here. Dean listened and only asked questions in between lulls and that just spurred his brother on more. It was getting pretty late when Sam cracked open the books to get some actual work done. Dean excused himself to go looking around the campus since they hadn’t done much of that when he helped Sam move in. He got as far as the library which was a 3 minute walk away when he noticed he may have been followed.   
He kept walking though, wanted to see if someone was really on his tail. Walking past one of the larger buildings, looked like it was the science building he ran into a patch of forest. His legs continued to carry him and his hand was on his blade stuck in the side of his pants as he heard the crunch of footsteps other than his. They were gaining on him, and there were an additional set that joined it. He turned to see two teens that couldn’t have been older than Sam. He wouldn’t have been on such high alert if they weren’t sporting blacked out eyes and foul grins on their faces.   
“Dean Winchester.” The blonde haired boy spoke first. “Now what are you doing all the way out here by your lonesome?”  
“Taking a stroll.” He pulled his blade out and widened his stance, ready for whatever happened next.   
“This is almost too easy.” The taller demon with dark skin and long dreads spoke. “Can’t get no better than this.”  
“Why don’t you fellas be on your way and I can continue my night walk hmm?” Dean did his best to have that cool, calm look on his face. Showing fear would do him no good right now.   
But a façade could only last so long and it broke when one of the demons moved too fast for him to catch it. He was now held roughly under his arms. The dread haired one stalked towards him, arm drawn back only to hit Dean in the middle so hard he swore he heard something crack. He doubled over and the blonde demon let him.   
Face front in the dirt now is how he laid. A rough kick to the side and he curled in on himself. The pain rang through him like a church bell on Christmas morning. A copper taste seeped in his mouth, his blood.   
“You’re not gonna continue shit Winchester. You’re gonna die here tonight. In the dirt, where you came from.”   
Dean was weak now, but he had enough energy to look up and see at least 4 more demons standing there. At least Sam is ok, he thought as consciousness was leaving him slowly. Another blow to his back and the pain caused him to snap back to reality.   
“No sleeping now Dean. I want you awake for this.” that earned the demon some laughs from his friends, and Dean felt humiliated. It would be his luck that he was getting jumped by a couple of Hell’s lackeys.  
“The only ones to die tonight will be you.”   
Dean used the last of his strength to peer up at that all too familiar voice. His vision was partially obscured due to it being half covered in dirt, the other in the fabric of a trench coat. He felt the warm touch of two fingers to the forehead and celestial energy pouring through him, putting him back together. Once the digits left him he heard the tell-tale noises of an angel in battle. Using his arms to push him up, once standing he saw that there were more demons than he’d originally thought. Some were fighting each other and he had to assume that those were the ones Crowley sent. He wasn’t concerned for them though, his thoughts lied with the ones that were fighting the angel. He was sure that Cas could do fine by himself, but Dean wasn’t one to just stand there and let him have all the action. No he was due to get his own hits in and he immediately went for the dread haired one.   
Blow for blow they matched for a while, that was until he threw a particular hard punch and thought he’d end Dean that way, but he dodged out the way just in time. His right hand shot out and plunged the blade right below the ribs. The demons screams were gargled and encased in the pain of his essence dying out. The wound and his eyes glowed like fire and as he removed the blade and stepped back the screams ceased and the demon fell in a lifeless heap. He felt a ping of pride that he didn’t have time to bask in as his next adversary lunged towards him. He sidestepped and once he was behind him he grabbed it by the collar and stabbed it in its back to the left of its spine. The same effect happened and he pushed the demon to the ground with more force than was necessary, but he was angry. His rage fueled him for the next couple of squabbles he had. Though he was pissed he felt good, killing these vile things and ridding the world of their nasty presence. He was on the high of it, adrenaline fulfilling its thrilling promises.   
All of that died out, however, when he looked to see the angel being held by two demons and being punched by a third. They were a ways away, and Dean pounced into action, running over to help the being in need. He saw the glint of the angel’s blade being held in the demons hand. It was gonna stab Cas, end this angel’s life right before Dean’s eyes. He wasn’t gonna let that happen. Not when he could do something about it. No matter what it took, and the consequences he’d have to endure for it. With that in mind his legs pumped harder than they ever have, right until they placed him between the angel and his blade.  
* * * *  
He awoke with a start. Looking down at his tattered clothes, his shirt ruined with spatters of blood and dirt. His leather jacket would for sure need a good wipe down. There was a particularly large spot of blood, not even completely dry on the lower left side of his abdomen. He was a hundred percent sure it was his, a hole there in the middle where a blade had undoubtedly gone through it, but the tanned skin behind it was unblemished. Looking up he saw two things. Demon warding sigils painted on all the walls of what looked to be a barn, and an angry angel pacing about the floor in front of the doors.   
Sitting up, the rustling noises caused the angel to look at him, all other movements stopped.   
“Dean.”   
He got up slowly as the angel made his way towards him. Always standing too close and never realizing what it did to Dean. Unlike earlier he let his fear show and he took a couple steps back only to have the angel move closer still. He also decided to let his concern show, a hand on the angels bicep as he looked him over.  
“Are you alright?” his voice betrayed him, he sounded scared and wrecked though he had tried to keep it even.   
“That’s your explanation for this?”  
“What?” he asked genuinely not knowing what Cas was talking about.   
“That was a stupid thing you did Dean.” He tore his arm away from the man’s grasp. “Why must you insist on being so foolish?” his voice was louder now.   
“Stupid?!” he was getting angry now. “You would’ve died if I didn’t step in!”   
“And another angel would’ve taken over my mission.”  
“No Cas I wasn’t letting you go out like that. I wouldn’t want another angel.” And dammit if that didn’t have more meanings than what it applied to right now.   
“Dean in the grand scheme of things my death means nothing. Your death sets things in motion and I cannot let that happen.”  
“I don’t give a shit about that. I care about you being stabbed to death for a mission you’re not even sure what it’s for! Sam’s fine and I need you to keep him that way.”  
It took him a second, but he realized he’d admitted something he buried so deep within himself he’d forgotten all about it. He felt it creep up on him. Like a violent virus spreading its poisonous DNA throughout him. Replacing every shred of reality he ever held onto. Warping his thoughts, wearing his mind thin. With weakened resolve his walls weren’t built for this. It was taking over, worming between the threads of his shield.   
“You don’t think you deserve to be saved.”   
And there it was, clearly a statement and not a question. Those blue ocean eyes gazed right through him. Past the rough outer shell he had wrapped himself in. The gas heated bang to ruin it all. He took a step back, the bare minimum movement was all he could do. Every string in each tendon spun and clenched so tight, ready to spring him as far away as possible. The fatal disconnect between his brain and body rendered him motionless.  
The angel was close now. So close to him, but he couldn’t move. How could he see right through him like that? His façade was strong, built over the years by the strength of his situations and his pride backing him. Now it was merely glass to this ethereal being. Dean did not do dependency outside of Sam. He’d only shown his true feelings with very few people. Whatever was thrown at him he could handle, and if he couldn’t he’d just keep pressing until he could. But this was all different, nearly everything was out of his control. Castiel, this angel, was asking for control and dependency. How could he ask Dean to be transparent and willing when he didn’t get that in return? It was unfair and honestly pissing him off. But he still couldn’t move, all the words filed in line just waiting to be tossed one by one out of his mouth and he couldn’t do that either.  
“You’re right.” A weak admission was all he could handle. The broken voice that leaked from him dropped with honesty he could not recognize.   
Castiel simply nodded and walked out of the barn.  
* * * *  
Life for Castiel was getting quite difficult at this point in time. He’d successfully killed all of the demons looking to kill Dean that night, but he failed in helping the man see that he was in fact worth saving. Even beyond the mission he felt it within himself to keep Dean and his brother from seeing their demise. He was too angry with Dean when he’d asked him that question, but he couldn’t help but ask. With the self-sacrificing actions at every turn he had to ask the man if that’s how he felt. It was a risk, him going to see his brother. Though he assured Dean countless times that his brother was fine, despite the fight he’d had ending in one of his brother’s lives being taken. Dean just had to see for himself, and that risk came with the consequences of last night. What really wounded Castiel was how sadly, and easily Dean gave his agreeance to the statement. Unshed tears in his eyes, slumped shoulders that were once wound tight with tension. He expected the man to get angry with him, to deny his claims. The fact that he didn’t solidified it even more. Dean truly believed he didn’t need to be saved  
Castiel was now on a new mission, albeit a selfish one. He needed to prove Dean wrong, and to do that he needed answers. He sought out a meeting with Uriel, the head of his garrison. He needed to know as much as he could about this apocalypse business, so that he could take whatever actions and precautions necessary for both the Winchesters benefit. They agreed to meet in the same barn he had taken Dean to the night before. He stood there in the middle of the floor studying the warding on the wall, making sure everything was still intact should he need it later.   
“Castiel.”   
He turned to see Uriel standing there with his arms folded and a smile on his face.   
“To what to I owe the pleasure?” he continued. “How are you brother?”  
“I need to know what’s at stake should either of the Winchesters die.”   
“Getting right down to it huh?” his smile grew wider. “You’re getting quite close to those mud monkeys.”  
“My mission is to protect them. How can I adequately do that if I don’t know what’s going on?”   
Castiel was well aware how Uriel viewed humans. Like many of his siblings he despised them. Saw them as low, disgusting creatures while Castiel saw them as anything but that. He also didn’t appreciate the usual insult he used being applied to Dean and Sam. He clenched his jaw to hold his tongue, he was still an agent of Heaven and a soldier didn’t talk down to his superiors.   
“There are larger things afoot Castiel, and you’d do best to do what you are told and nothing beyond that.”   
Uriel left him standing there in the barn, with more questions and no answers in his pockets.   
* * * *  
Life for Sam Winchester was getting more frustrating the more he met up with Ruby. She had so many things to tell him, much more than what he was originally led to believe. She wasn’t the once who was the root of the problem though, quite the opposite, she was the solution. Slowly and surely he learned more and more about the world that was really around him. Dean had spent the night, sleeping on his floor. They talked through the majority of the night even though Dean had a long drive back and Sam had class in the morning. It was so hard to act like everything was ok, like he wasn’t surrounded by people who haven’t told him the truth.  
Demons, he’d learned about first. How they worked where they came from, the fact that Ruby was one herself. He didn’t talk to her for a couple of days after that one. He was too afraid to face her, knowing that she was hitching a ride in some poor college girls body. Ruby was stubborn though, and refused to be ignored. She’d pushed her way back into his life, swearing and promising him that the girl’s body she was using was fine, and that the girl inside was fine as well.   
Creatures, he’d learned about some of those second. Vampires weren’t pale fantasy creatures like they were pictured in the movies. They looked like anyone else, until they brought their teeth out. He’d asked where the creatures go when they die. She didn’t have an answer for that.   
His abilities, she taught him those next. What he thought were nonsense dreams were actually small glimpses into the future. He didn’t like that too much. He didn’t want to receive a vision that he couldn’t stop from happening. Like when he’d seen Castiel get attacked in Dean’s bedroom. He never did know if that actually happened or not. He also could expel demons from a human. That one he liked. The practice he didn’t like so much. Ruby had said that it was essential that he learned these things. He’d be helping people, saving them from fates worse than death. She’d shown him how a dose of demon blood could accentuate his powers. He found that gross at first, but one taste of her and he was hooked. She was a mix of salty sweet, and he enjoyed drinking it. They practiced on their friend Brady, getting him possessed and having Sam cast the demon out. Ruby assured him that doing it with someone he cared about would work best, so he could get used to the feeling and be able to do it for a complete stranger. That had been stressful.   
Dean and John Winchester, she saved that for last. They were hunters of the supernatural. His Dad was known and feared, and Dean was following in his legacy. That was the reason John had been less than half there with them all these years, why they’d been given to Bobby to be raised. It angered him that all these years he’d spent resenting his father, when he could’ve died in this line of work. All the half confused babbles that his Dad would rattle off while the sickness was taking over his body. He’d thought it was just the mess that happened when someone got sick, no it was a man letting go of a life he’d hidden from his children. Somehow Dean was wrapped up in this as well, he was eager to learn about that. Ruby had told him not to tell Dean until he went home for Thanksgiving.   
When he had asked Ruby who was she working for, who sent her—she was silent about that.  
* * * *  
Castiel looked into the apartment. Made sure to keep his presence hidden. Dean was not doing so well right now. Though he wanted to reach out and make sure the man was alright he’d decided against it. Uriel’s behavior was expected, but something about the last thing he said rang sour to him. What bigger things could be afoot outside of the apocalypse? This whole mission was too hidden for his liking. In all the years he’d lived, all the things he’d seen and done, he’d never received such vague instructions. How was he supposed to protect someone who was so willing to lay down his life at the drop of a hat? While he was happy that the man cared for his existence so strongly that he was fine with forsaking his own safety to make sure that Cas remained on this plane, it was useless. Sure he wasn’t up to date with pop culture, and he didn’t understand most of Dean’s jokes, but he knew enough about humans to know that his words had cut the man deep. Deep enough to drive him to drink, which is what he was doing now of course.   
He watched the scene for quite a while. Every sip drove him deeper in his sadness. Once the bottle was finished and the man went to his upper cabinet to grab another one he couldn’t watch anymore. He needed to talk to Gabriel, answers were needed more than ever. So he would return to Dean prepared, ready to clean up any mess the man made.


	13. Not an actual chapter sorry

This work is on a bit of a hiatus. It's not abandoned but I've got some serious writers block with this baby. Apologies to everyone who was reading this work.


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